My sisters eat like their rich, I dont want to
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Originally Posted By: Firehawk409
Has anyone noticed he said he bought a friend over? So it's not 45 for ONE person.
No it was only me. Every time has been just me.
Originally Posted By: bigmike
Just eat before you go. Problem solved.
Great idea, I think ill do this. And when I go ill just say im not hungry I had already ate. Though it would look awkward going knowing i was heading to a dinner. They usually tell me well in advance, so and so dinner on so and so day and you want to pay me so and so amount.
Has anyone noticed he said he bought a friend over? So it's not 45 for ONE person.
No it was only me. Every time has been just me.
Originally Posted By: bigmike
Just eat before you go. Problem solved.
Great idea, I think ill do this. And when I go ill just say im not hungry I had already ate. Though it would look awkward going knowing i was heading to a dinner. They usually tell me well in advance, so and so dinner on so and so day and you want to pay me so and so amount.
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Originally Posted By: dave1251
jcwit, you took the words out of my mouth. But I would be a bit more rude than you. I would laugh at any family member that invited me to dinner and then expected me to pay for the food I ate. I am sorry even if a family member stays with me for a uninvited extended stay, I would not even dare to ask for food payment. Especially from a sibling.
Well thats exactly how I see it too, but unfortunately my sisters think different. And its not just dinners i have to pay for my food but nephews birthdays, etc....I pay for my food, my water and my cake. Chips, cookies, anything extra I eat they throw that into my total bill.
For my birthdays, the past few years, they invited and took me out to dinner. But I had to pay for my dinner, even the cake that my sister brought I had to give her $10 for my slice. She chose the cake from her expensive bakery, I didnt even get to choose what kind. Not kidding.
jcwit, you took the words out of my mouth. But I would be a bit more rude than you. I would laugh at any family member that invited me to dinner and then expected me to pay for the food I ate. I am sorry even if a family member stays with me for a uninvited extended stay, I would not even dare to ask for food payment. Especially from a sibling.
Well thats exactly how I see it too, but unfortunately my sisters think different. And its not just dinners i have to pay for my food but nephews birthdays, etc....I pay for my food, my water and my cake. Chips, cookies, anything extra I eat they throw that into my total bill.
For my birthdays, the past few years, they invited and took me out to dinner. But I had to pay for my dinner, even the cake that my sister brought I had to give her $10 for my slice. She chose the cake from her expensive bakery, I didnt even get to choose what kind. Not kidding.
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Originally Posted By: yonyon
Don't be afraid. Use the power of the guilt. They will see the error of their ways
...
or perish.
Um, never mind that or perish bit.
I will go your suggested route for next time and eat before I go. Since they let me know ahead of time, ill let her know that I wont be eating and ill just come visit. That way she wont be surprised all of a sudden and if anything wont have to buy extra food for me.
Im not trying to defend them but I do see where everyone has to pitch in. Since everyone else is bringing food and Im not and never allowed to, instead I give money...just too much money.
And no im not kidding when I said they invite me and take me out for dinner on my birthday and I pay my own bill.
Don't be afraid. Use the power of the guilt. They will see the error of their ways
...
or perish.
Um, never mind that or perish bit.
I will go your suggested route for next time and eat before I go. Since they let me know ahead of time, ill let her know that I wont be eating and ill just come visit. That way she wont be surprised all of a sudden and if anything wont have to buy extra food for me.
Im not trying to defend them but I do see where everyone has to pitch in. Since everyone else is bringing food and Im not and never allowed to, instead I give money...just too much money.
And no im not kidding when I said they invite me and take me out for dinner on my birthday and I pay my own bill.
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Originally Posted By: Carnoobie
Originally Posted By: dave1251
jcwit, you took the words out of my mouth. But I would be a bit more rude than you. I would laugh at any family member that invited me to dinner and then expected me to pay for the food I ate. I am sorry even if a family member stays with me for a uninvited extended stay, I would not even dare to ask for food payment. Especially from a sibling.
Well thats exactly how I see it too, but unfortunately my sisters think different. And its not just dinners i have to pay for my food but nephews birthdays, etc....I pay for my food, my water and my cake. Chips, cookies, anything extra I eat they throw that into my total bill.
For my birthdays, the past few years, they invited and took me out to dinner. But I had to pay for my dinner, even the cake that my sister brought I had to give her $10 for my slice. She chose the cake from her expensive bakery, I didnt even get to choose what kind. Not kidding.
That's crazy. Do they not go to other peoples' parties and see that this is not the norm? Is this a Canadian thing?
If I had to take a wild guess, I would say your sister blows every cent of her paycheck when she gets it. Some people have a fake it till you make it way of doing things. That's the only situation where I could see someone charging a family member for a meal, and even then it's messed up.
Originally Posted By: dave1251
jcwit, you took the words out of my mouth. But I would be a bit more rude than you. I would laugh at any family member that invited me to dinner and then expected me to pay for the food I ate. I am sorry even if a family member stays with me for a uninvited extended stay, I would not even dare to ask for food payment. Especially from a sibling.
Well thats exactly how I see it too, but unfortunately my sisters think different. And its not just dinners i have to pay for my food but nephews birthdays, etc....I pay for my food, my water and my cake. Chips, cookies, anything extra I eat they throw that into my total bill.
For my birthdays, the past few years, they invited and took me out to dinner. But I had to pay for my dinner, even the cake that my sister brought I had to give her $10 for my slice. She chose the cake from her expensive bakery, I didnt even get to choose what kind. Not kidding.
That's crazy. Do they not go to other peoples' parties and see that this is not the norm? Is this a Canadian thing?
If I had to take a wild guess, I would say your sister blows every cent of her paycheck when she gets it. Some people have a fake it till you make it way of doing things. That's the only situation where I could see someone charging a family member for a meal, and even then it's messed up.
I would not go to these dinners if my family was charging me for it.
Kind of a half-measure, that is. If you were a Jew like me I'd say it would work (this is family after all) but could take years to teach them anything. Still, being as you're Canadian and all, which is like being Polish but without all the beautiful women, maybe a half-measure will work like a full one.
I still can't get past the charging a family member for a meal, that is seriously messed up.
Originally Posted By: Carnoobie
Originally Posted By: dave1251
jcwit, you took the words out of my mouth. But I would be a bit more rude than you. I would laugh at any family member that invited me to dinner and then expected me to pay for the food I ate. I am sorry even if a family member stays with me for a uninvited extended stay, I would not even dare to ask for food payment. Especially from a sibling.
Well thats exactly how I see it too, but unfortunately my sisters think different. And its not just dinners i have to pay for my food but nephews birthdays, etc....I pay for my food, my water and my cake. Chips, cookies, anything extra I eat they throw that into my total bill.
For my birthdays, the past few years, they invited and took me out to dinner. But I had to pay for my dinner, even the cake that my sister brought I had to give her $10 for my slice. She chose the cake from her expensive bakery, I didnt even get to choose what kind. Not kidding.
You know what? After reading this post, I am absolutely CONVINCED that one of these scenarios is true. Scenario number 1) You must be completely pulling everyone's leg here on Bitog and only start these ridiculous threads in order to see what folks here will solicit in response. Or....scenario number 2) You are totally incapable of making decisions that take the VERY slightest...tiniest...most miniscule bit of courage and prefer instead, to be a doormat.
There just isn't any other POSSIBLE reason.
One last question though....were you raised in a single parent household by your mother? It truly seems obvious that you've not had a normal male figure involved in your upbringing.
Originally Posted By: dave1251
jcwit, you took the words out of my mouth. But I would be a bit more rude than you. I would laugh at any family member that invited me to dinner and then expected me to pay for the food I ate. I am sorry even if a family member stays with me for a uninvited extended stay, I would not even dare to ask for food payment. Especially from a sibling.
Well thats exactly how I see it too, but unfortunately my sisters think different. And its not just dinners i have to pay for my food but nephews birthdays, etc....I pay for my food, my water and my cake. Chips, cookies, anything extra I eat they throw that into my total bill.
For my birthdays, the past few years, they invited and took me out to dinner. But I had to pay for my dinner, even the cake that my sister brought I had to give her $10 for my slice. She chose the cake from her expensive bakery, I didnt even get to choose what kind. Not kidding.
You know what? After reading this post, I am absolutely CONVINCED that one of these scenarios is true. Scenario number 1) You must be completely pulling everyone's leg here on Bitog and only start these ridiculous threads in order to see what folks here will solicit in response. Or....scenario number 2) You are totally incapable of making decisions that take the VERY slightest...tiniest...most miniscule bit of courage and prefer instead, to be a doormat.
There just isn't any other POSSIBLE reason.
One last question though....were you raised in a single parent household by your mother? It truly seems obvious that you've not had a normal male figure involved in your upbringing.
Originally Posted By: zrxkawboy
Originally Posted By: DuckRyder
I still can't get past the charging a family member for a meal, that is seriously messed up.
Yes, it is. But charging him for his own birthday dinner and cake? That's beyond messed up.
No...what is MESSED UP is the fact that he actually ALLOWS for this to happen. It makes one think of a jellyfish.....but without any stinging tentacles of course.
Originally Posted By: DuckRyder
I still can't get past the charging a family member for a meal, that is seriously messed up.
Yes, it is. But charging him for his own birthday dinner and cake? That's beyond messed up.
No...what is MESSED UP is the fact that he actually ALLOWS for this to happen. It makes one think of a jellyfish.....but without any stinging tentacles of course.
Im going out a limb, to say, that your sisters are big ol fat girls? Introduce them to Jenny Craig.
Originally Posted By: hattaresguy
I don't eat [censored] only real food. Either from a farm market, or Whole Foods is pretty good.
I refuse to even eat a piece of gum from Walmart.
I guess I'm crazy for eating food from the Walmart deli...
I don't eat [censored] only real food. Either from a farm market, or Whole Foods is pretty good.
I refuse to even eat a piece of gum from Walmart.
I guess I'm crazy for eating food from the Walmart deli...
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Originally Posted By: DuckRyder
I still can't get past the charging a family member for a meal, that is seriously messed up.
+1 - I grew up in the southern US and never heard of anything like this; heck we would feed anyone and everyone. The two things I see are (as some stated):
#1 - They charge you instead of letting you bring a dish (if my dish was not good enough then too bad they would not have to eat it)--surely not all of the family have this incessant need to eat high-end food.
#2 - You seem to avoid conflict at all costs. Sometimes, conflict is needed to solve certain issues. There must be a way to discuss in a reasonable way with your sisters and come to an agreement. If not, then you are actually better off not going and arrange to see the kids at another time.
As a side note, it is very easy for me (or anyone else) to say what you **should** do because we are not in the middle of the situation--long distance advice is easy to give. Good luck!
I still can't get past the charging a family member for a meal, that is seriously messed up.
+1 - I grew up in the southern US and never heard of anything like this; heck we would feed anyone and everyone. The two things I see are (as some stated):
#1 - They charge you instead of letting you bring a dish (if my dish was not good enough then too bad they would not have to eat it)--surely not all of the family have this incessant need to eat high-end food.
#2 - You seem to avoid conflict at all costs. Sometimes, conflict is needed to solve certain issues. There must be a way to discuss in a reasonable way with your sisters and come to an agreement. If not, then you are actually better off not going and arrange to see the kids at another time.
As a side note, it is very easy for me (or anyone else) to say what you **should** do because we are not in the middle of the situation--long distance advice is easy to give. Good luck!
No one would dare do this messed up thing but Family!
Grow a spine and stand up to the domination. No one can stomp you down unless you roll over and let them. You need to speak up and tell those dominatrix's that you want a new deal.
Family is a great thing most of the time but this is just wrong.
Grow a spine and stand up to the domination. No one can stomp you down unless you roll over and let them. You need to speak up and tell those dominatrix's that you want a new deal.
Family is a great thing most of the time but this is just wrong.
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Originally Posted By: yonyon
or perish.
Big Plus One.
or perish.
Big Plus One.
Originally Posted By: 01rangerxl
You know what? After reading this post, I am absolutely CONVINCED that one of these scenarios is true. Scenario number 1) You must be completely pulling everyone's leg here on Bitog and only start these ridiculous threads in order to see what folks here will solicit in response. Or....scenario number 2) You are totally incapable of making decisions that take the VERY slightest...tiniest...most miniscule bit of courage and prefer instead, to be a doormat.
There just isn't any other POSSIBLE reason.
One last question though....were you raised in a single parent household by your mother? It truly seems obvious that you've not had a normal male figure involved in your upbringing.
Im not pulling anyones leg. Im telling it as it is, if you dont want to believe me, then fine, I cant force you. Do you not think there was a more shocked person at my birthday dinner than me? Trust me, I was a bit taken back by it when I had to pay my own dinner and cake.
And #2 is right, I sometimes dont know how to go about decisions so thats why i asked others. Now I have ideas on how to go about the next dinner.
The reason why I dont want to bring this up with them is cause I have 3 sisters, all older, all will gang up on me and Id have no one to back me up. And well lets just say, one I dont get a long with (we dont even talk), and the other 2 can be a bit rocky at times but we get along in general. A while back they said the reason for them charging me is cause Im an adult now and can pay my own way at all family gatherings. Life isnt free and they dont want me freeloading or relying on others. According to them, they said inviting me over to their place and charging me for the food I eat is no different than us going out to a restaurant and me paying my bill.
You know what? After reading this post, I am absolutely CONVINCED that one of these scenarios is true. Scenario number 1) You must be completely pulling everyone's leg here on Bitog and only start these ridiculous threads in order to see what folks here will solicit in response. Or....scenario number 2) You are totally incapable of making decisions that take the VERY slightest...tiniest...most miniscule bit of courage and prefer instead, to be a doormat.
There just isn't any other POSSIBLE reason.
One last question though....were you raised in a single parent household by your mother? It truly seems obvious that you've not had a normal male figure involved in your upbringing.
Im not pulling anyones leg. Im telling it as it is, if you dont want to believe me, then fine, I cant force you. Do you not think there was a more shocked person at my birthday dinner than me? Trust me, I was a bit taken back by it when I had to pay my own dinner and cake.
And #2 is right, I sometimes dont know how to go about decisions so thats why i asked others. Now I have ideas on how to go about the next dinner.
The reason why I dont want to bring this up with them is cause I have 3 sisters, all older, all will gang up on me and Id have no one to back me up. And well lets just say, one I dont get a long with (we dont even talk), and the other 2 can be a bit rocky at times but we get along in general. A while back they said the reason for them charging me is cause Im an adult now and can pay my own way at all family gatherings. Life isnt free and they dont want me freeloading or relying on others. According to them, they said inviting me over to their place and charging me for the food I eat is no different than us going out to a restaurant and me paying my bill.
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