Hey Chris, I have not taken the time to read all of the responses but I'm in the same situation you're in now. This may be a long winded one. Anyways I'm with a girl that I met through an ex girlfriend about 4 or 5 years ago. We started dating over a year ago and she's been divorced from her ex for almost 5 years now. Well she has 3 children with him. From the moment we started dating he tried pulling the same [censored] that your gf's ex hubby is doing. The problem is that the only bf she had (I'm her 2nd one since the divorce) let this guy get away with anything. He would say things and try and get in the middle and the bf just let it happen.
Now when we first started dating he would tell the boys that mommy can't see you because she's dating this guy and she won't spend time with you which was far from the truth. It got so bad that he had the children call her 20 times in a row, crying, one night. Well I told her to tell him the only time he is to talk to her is about when they are swaping out the children with one another. Well that ended the crying child sympathy plea for her to come back.
So now moving on....He started calling her, and got [censored] off because as soon as he would say so how are you doing, she would say "This has nothing to do with the children GOODBYE!" and after about three months he got the point there. Well we go to drop off the children one day at the end of that three months and he flips both of us off as we're leaving.
Then right after that he tells her they are still married in the eyes of god even after the marriage has been annulled, trust me I've seen the papers. Well I told her to let him know if he talks to her like that again, he knows where I live and instead of flipping people off in front of the children he needs to be a man. At this point he was refusing to give her the child support checks that were coming in the mail and was threatening to hide them so she couldn't get them. Well we told him go ahead so we can file charges and make things easier on everyone since he'd be locked away
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Things quieted down a bit for a few months until he started trying to talk to her again and she said "this isn't about the children BYE" cutting him off in mid sentence. So this stopped again for a little bit. Well recently he started claiming he was still her siblings brother in law. We put a stop to that real quick and so did her family as well.
Moral to the story. If you both act like you don't care and ignore things with a situation like this it will get better. At this point they are trying to get a rise out of you and if you don't give in and neither does she things will work themselves out
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