Help with my girlfriends ex

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Well.my opinion is if you aren't real worried ignore his nonsense. If you think its a real threat and he may do something tell the police you want them to patrol your area more and maybe consider restraining order if you personally feel threatened. If he actually confronts you try to have class and not cause a problem but don't take an abundance of bull either. Be assertive stand your ground and handle it with courage. He is probably not guna do anything but you know if he does
 
Your girlfriend knows him a lot better than you do. Is he a violent man? does he have a history of violence against her? Has he been in contact with her lately? There are a lot of details to know.

I would just watch my back, find out what he drives, have some protection handy and wait for the next move. Or turn him on to BITOG...that ought to keep him busy for awhile!
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Originally Posted By: Chris142
We do not live together. We have been dating almost 2 years so I'm not going to boot her just yet. This is the first time we have heard about him doing this. And as I said I'd notice a car following us everywhere except maybe on a busy street.

I'm going to keep a better watch on my tail but untill I see some strange activity I won't know any more. He was known for his tall tails.

I never had a problem with their past. He divorced her and I came along years later. It's not like I stole her from him.

I Used to know what he drove and I could I.D. him.


Ahhhh...two years, that does change things a bit...I guess I assumed you had just started seeing her...guess you are pretty invested at this point.

In that case, if you aren't going to leave her...I would first try to verify if the guy is in fact following you or her and if he is....I would have HER file a report with the police department. IME, they will take her claims of harrassment very seriously...you or I not so much. Of course, this may all be over nothing....good luck!
 
Originally Posted By: musicmanbass
So.... what do you carry? I really like the S&W M&P compacts, 9 or .40 should do just fine.
If he has been following us he has seen us go to the shooting range
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I have a .32ACp Colt 1903, A Mossbeg 500 Shotgun thats dead nuts accurate with 1oz slugs and a Remington 1100 that doesn't jam no matter how fast you pull the trigger.
 
Chris,
You so far have no more than a story from someone who may just like to shake up a jar of captured bees to see if they'll fight.
The ex may have been running his mouth, but I doubt that he'll really do anything.
Nonetheless, keep your awareness high until you're certain that the guy isn't really stalking you and your girl.
There are a few crazies out there, especially after they've had a few and have been challenged to act by buddies egging them on.
A fistfight is one thing, but a mad drunk with a gun is another.
Be confident, but wary.
 
Originally Posted By: SLCraig
Strange. Usually takes me only a year or so if I've been heartbroken before I stop caring what they are doing. 10 is absolutely ridiculous.


That is crazy indeed! When my ex wife and I split last December, she immediately started dating someone that we both knew, and I was ticked off to say the least! But it didn't take me long to get over my anger, just a few months, and during that time I never once thought about doing anything bad to either of them.

Now, whenever I see the guy with her, I can carry on a normal conversation with him and am not angry with him in the least. I realized that he makes her happy, and I simply wasn't as happy with her as I thought I was, she really wasn't my soulmate at all. So there is no need for me to be angry with either one of them, I've moved on with my life and so have they. Carrying a grudge does NOBODY any good at all. So for this guy to be ticked off 10 years later, that's just insane!
 
He cheated and divorced her and married someone else. If I were you I'd call this guy up and ask him why is he upset and why shouldn't you be dating his ex wife. If he is not being rational and is hostile, talk to his current wife (the woman he cheated on and later married) or file a restraining order.

Sometimes men with sour grapes just said things that doesn't make sense and would retract their statement later on if you give them a way to back off.

If you really love this woman and plan to marry her later, you may kick you self later by leaving just because of a hostile ex husband.
 
If it bothers you a lot, you could go find the man and see how he acts toward you and tell him someone told you that he may be mad at you or whatever. If that happened to me, I don't think I could sleep at night until I met with this man and got that off my chest.
 
Your all insane, this is from a friend story. It could not even be true and if it is so what? No reason to talk to the guy, its his problem, if there even is one, I highly doubt. He may not even be aware the story is out there. Wht flatter him with caring about his feeelings. You never seen a follower. Your all drama queens.
 
Many years ago I became friends of a very pretty woman that lived with a man that beat her. We all worked in the same place. He was a fighter, would fight at the drop of a hat if he was drinking, which he did often. His girl needed help and I felt sorry for her. I used to see black & blue marks on her arms. When she smiled at me I felt powerless and unable to keep my nose out of it. I used to call her on the phone and once I told her of an advance he made to another female worker there. When he heard about it [she told him and threatened to leave him, IIRR], he called me and hollered at me on the phone, and then hung up, saying he was going to kick my butt or something like that. I could not work feeling that way. He scared the [censored] out of me. I got off of work for a few minutes and drove to his house to see him, we were working different shifts, and he acted like he was afraid of me. I think he thought I went there to kick HIS @$$, lol. I guess the guy had a guilty conscience from beating her.

He did get what was coming to him, her brothers roughed him up real good and he left her alone, and then they broke up.
 
It doesn't sound like it's worth even thinking about at this point. I wouldn't do anything different, and I'd be friendly if I encountered him.
 
I wouldn't be worried too much about it. I think it's a load anyways...


That, and I'm sure there are many places to dump a body out there..
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(If he messes with you)
 
Until I heard something directly from him, I'd act as there is no problem.

Sure, I'd be cautious and alert, maintain confidence, be armed, etc. But shouldn't you always be like that?
 
Originally Posted By: bigmike
Until I heard something directly from him, I'd act as there is no problem.

Sure, I'd be cautious and alert, maintain confidence, be armed, etc. But shouldn't you always be like that?
Thats my thinking too.
 
Hey Chris, I have not taken the time to read all of the responses but I'm in the same situation you're in now. This may be a long winded one. Anyways I'm with a girl that I met through an ex girlfriend about 4 or 5 years ago. We started dating over a year ago and she's been divorced from her ex for almost 5 years now. Well she has 3 children with him. From the moment we started dating he tried pulling the same [censored] that your gf's ex hubby is doing. The problem is that the only bf she had (I'm her 2nd one since the divorce) let this guy get away with anything. He would say things and try and get in the middle and the bf just let it happen.

Now when we first started dating he would tell the boys that mommy can't see you because she's dating this guy and she won't spend time with you which was far from the truth. It got so bad that he had the children call her 20 times in a row, crying, one night. Well I told her to tell him the only time he is to talk to her is about when they are swaping out the children with one another. Well that ended the crying child sympathy plea for her to come back.

So now moving on....He started calling her, and got [censored] off because as soon as he would say so how are you doing, she would say "This has nothing to do with the children GOODBYE!" and after about three months he got the point there. Well we go to drop off the children one day at the end of that three months and he flips both of us off as we're leaving.

Then right after that he tells her they are still married in the eyes of god even after the marriage has been annulled, trust me I've seen the papers. Well I told her to let him know if he talks to her like that again, he knows where I live and instead of flipping people off in front of the children he needs to be a man. At this point he was refusing to give her the child support checks that were coming in the mail and was threatening to hide them so she couldn't get them. Well we told him go ahead so we can file charges and make things easier on everyone since he'd be locked away
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Things quieted down a bit for a few months until he started trying to talk to her again and she said "this isn't about the children BYE" cutting him off in mid sentence. So this stopped again for a little bit. Well recently he started claiming he was still her siblings brother in law. We put a stop to that real quick and so did her family as well.

Moral to the story. If you both act like you don't care and ignore things with a situation like this it will get better. At this point they are trying to get a rise out of you and if you don't give in and neither does she things will work themselves out
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Originally Posted By: Brenden
Find a large long object that serves a double purpose, like my 36inch torque wrench, I keep it in the back seat for "checking the lug nuts."

I would find what the guy looks like, and keep an eye out...


LOL I do that with an axe handle, I left the price tag on it just in case.
 
If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Too much....she said, she heard, he said.....whatever. Don't worry about it until something actually happens.
 
Originally Posted By: morris
take him hunting.


Originally Posted By: fdcg27
take him sailing:)


Naw! Shovel and 55 Gallon drum works better!!
 
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