supton, I think if you and your wife drive the two Toyotas you're considering back-to-back, the choice will jump out at you. Ten minutes each will probably do the trick.
And if you drive, say, the a Camry LE within a few minutes of driving the only Corolla available with a manual transmission, the SE, I think you'll find that the Corolla will feel smaller (for obvious reasons; it is smaller) and more nimble (because it weighs several hundred poinds less) than the Camry LE. Also, given one of your stated priorities -- namely, a car with 17" wheels and tires -- only the Camry LE has them. The manual transmission Corolla SE comes equipped with 18" alloys (pretty good looking ones, too). With regard to cost, you'll find the Camry's MSRP is roughly $2k more than the Corolla SE's ($25k+$1k shipping vs. $23k+$1k shipping), but almost certainly the Camry will be discounted more, and thus the two cars will probably end up being similarly priced "OTD," if for no other reason that Corolla SE with a manual transmission may command a surcharge depending on the dealer, because that model is somewhat harder to find and buyers in their 20s are willing to pay more for one.
As for which one will last longer and cost less to own in the long run, my money's on the Camry lasting a week longer and costing $100 more to own than the Corolla over a ten-year period. Why, you ask? Because the larger 2.5-liter engine in the Camry will be doing less work than the 2-liter 163-hp engine in the Corolla. (The Camry barely ticks over 1k rpm at 60 mph.) The Camry's transmission, on the other hand, will be more expensive to service. (Doubt that? Check the cost of the Camry's transmission fluid; not cheap. The Camry's transmission also has a complex service procedure.)
There you have it. My hunch is you're going to opt for the Camry. Your wife, on the other hand, is going to prefer driving the Corolla SE with a manual transmission, assuming you can find one. Hope it works out for you. Let us know which one you choose