Originally Posted By: NHHEMI
Originally Posted By: Pop_Rivit
While everyone has the right to live their lives as they see fit, I couldn't imagine making this life journey without my wife.
Marriage is the only way to fully experience the 4 types of love-friendship (philia), passion (eros), everyday familiarity (storge), and above all, a self sacrificing love (agape) where we each put the other's needs above our own. I have to feel a certain amount of pity for someone who will never know the fruits of cultivating a lifelong marital friendship with another person.
Originally Posted By: Stelth
I'm pretty much a "live and let live" kind of guy, so while I don't desire your lifestyle, it makes no difference to me if you do.
I'm a happily married guy, 31 years so far. I don't ask you to approve or disapprove, just as you don't need my approval or disapproval.
BTW, to you bachelors out there, I recommend the Joe Jackson song, "Happy Loving Couples," from the Look Sharp album. Great album in any case.
Pop_Rivit - When did you get married( I believe many years ago ). Stelth - by your quote you have been married for over 30 years( that is great btw ).
The vast majority of the pro marriage folks here at BITOG have been married a long time. I think it skews your perspective on what faces single men THESE days.
It is a different world and a very different woman( how they think and act )out there now. It's a real [censored] shoot these days.
I wonder if you would have the same fortune if you were young and got married now vs back when you did?
A valid question, and one I of course can't answer. I have one married daughter, and a son who is getting pretty serious with a girl. My best recommendation to anyone considering marriage is to get pre-marital counseling. A good counselor can ferret out some of the future problems that may come up, and at least get a good idea if two people are capable of commitment. My wife and I didn't get any pre-marital counseling, but it probably would have helped us understand how to deal with the kinds of things that come up in relationships.
After 31 years of marriage, I can honestly say that I'm pretty familiar with my wife's strengths and weaknesses, and I've certainly had a good look at my own. I don't worship her, but I love her more deeply than I would have thought possible. Just as an aside, if dogs are capable of worship, our dogs do worship my wife. She's definitely the alpha as far as they're concerned.
But I do think that there are women out there who are looking for a life-long commitment, and are capable of it. Yes, it's harder, since divorce becomes more acceptable every day, and more people feel entitled, but I would certainly hope that my kids are capable of the necessary commitment, and I do see what appear to be pretty good marriages among young people.