How to deal with family member that drinks heavily

[FranklinJL]

Best to avoid this person. Alcoholics never get better only worse. Most never recover. Ive been around several in my life, and its best just to cut them off. They are never worth the time. You didnt cause it, cant control it, cant cure it.....

 

[snarl]

Every time he drives intoxicated call the cops.

 

[Urshurak776]

My wife has a Nephew that is the same way. Disappears for months at a time. Homeless. Anytime anyone has tried to help him it blows up in their face. He's mid-30's now. It's very sad. My wife feels awful as she used to babysit him when he was little. Has a place in her heart.

Straight up though, he's a drunk. Even his parents feel awful, but it's a lost cause and everyone knows it. His Dad told me a couple months ago his biggest fear is when he gets that phone call where he is found dead....

Advice about your sister, have a conversation with her about it. If she doesn't understand your perspective, that's her issue. May hurt you, but you deserve better than that. You may need to move on from both of them unfortunately.

 

[97prizm]

I have an in-law that has a habit of excessive alcohol consumption coupled with a propensity to engage in alcohol induced rage. Suffice it to say that he has said some horrific things about me and my family members while under the influence.

I recently had another less than desirable interaction with him while he was intoxicated and decided to put an end to it.

I once tried explaining his drunken behavior to my sister and she became highly defensive and told me to "take it up with him". Many suspect he has some type of alcohol use disorder, but it is a sensitive topic to bring up. My sister resented my mother for scolding her about his drunken behavior.

I would like to communicate to my sister that my tolerance threshold from his drunken antics has been exceeded and l never again want to be in his presence if he has been drinking or any possibility exists that he will be drinking. But she will most likely defend him and accuse me of being the problem as in the past.

Is there a tactful way of approaching the subject without offending anyone?

My dad had an uncle like that. They distanced themselves from him for many years. Eventually he came around stopped drinking and became a completely different person.