Help with my girlfriends ex

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Chris142

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My girlfriend is divorced. Long story short. About 15 years ago her and her husband were part of the same Jeep club I was in.

We wern't really buddies but we all knew each other.

I got a different job which didn't allow me any Jeep time so I stopped going out with the Jeep club.

10 years ago her husband got stupid. He started cheating on her and finally divorced her. She was just an innocent bystander, she tried to get him to go to counseling, church etc but he wouldn't have it.

He married the girl he was cheating on her with.

After my ex and him had been divorced 8 or so years me and her ran into each other, exchanged numbers and began dating.

She ran into a good friend of her ex's yesterday and he told her that he was mad at me for "going after her" and that reciently he has been following us.

Why would a guy that divorced a girl nearly 10 years ago care who she's dating now?

I have not noticed anybody following us. If he is it's in town as I would see dust and another car when out in the desert.

For example we took a 300m trip yesterday and I doubt he followed us since we were out in the desert on a paved hwy and there wasn't any other cars around.

He must be following us if he see's us in town?

I guess I will be paying more attn to my surroundings now.

Can't do a restraining order since we have no proof of this yet.
 
I don't believe you actually need proof of anything for a restraining order, but I wouldn't go there quite yet. 1st I would wonder how credable this person was that says he follows you?

Just becareful there are some serious wack jobs in this world. Keep an eye on your back bud and be safe
 
Wow, that's the height of intelligence. I don't want her, but you can't have her.

Somebody has issues he needs to work out.
 
Find a large long object that serves a double purpose, like my 36inch torque wrench, I keep it in the back seat for "checking the lug nuts."

I would find what the guy looks like, and keep an eye out...
 
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Honestly, the very first thing you should do is look over her car to see if there might be a tracking device under it somewhere.

Then, just find out if he lives near either of your places and sees if you are coming and going, or if he lives near someplace that the two of you frequent, so he sees you there.

Honestly, until he actually says something to the two of you directly, ignore any messages delivered by third parties. He might actually be the one who is mad you are dating her, as he didn't get his chance to do so.

BC.
 
Quote:

Why would a guy that divorced a girl nearly 10 years ago care who she's dating now?


Its a Jeep thing...

My impression is he may see her as belonging to him...like a possession. You are moving in on his territory. The way he treated her was discarding her when he found something he wanted more. It sounds like his maturity level is not matching his age. My advice would be to not sink to his level. Sounds like you are treating his ex-wife right. Good luck!
 
What does "following you" mean? Stalking? keeping an eye out? or is it more benign just asking, inquiring, acting mad, etc?

Do the two of you live together? Do you know what he drives? can you ID him?

Ripping people in half is an immature response, and it does not seem that going into full defensive mode complete with moat and bodyguard is necessary just yet.

Id probably try to be situationally aware first. Find where he lives and determine a way to ID his cars, etc. Try to find where he works, how might you cross paths, etc.

I'd make sure that you had a smartphone or other means of capturing pictures and video to document any situation.

And then be vigilant because there are crazy folks out there, so use any chance you have to identify and log/report any funny business. Realize that it may come to a head abruptly with the two of you together, or either one individually, so it may be smart to play "war games" and run the scenarios together.
 
So what, the guy does not like you, because your dating his ex-wife. Its a case of sour grapes. I hope you realize, you never were goinbg to be drinking buddies with this guy. If your bigger than him, taunt him, otherwise stay away and let him grumble. Your girlfriend is apparently hot and a catch or he wouldnt be so concerned. His loss, your gain. Be content with your prize and dont concern yourself with his drama. I know there are alot of nut cases, but this is probably being exaggeated by the friend, who is bored. Dont be sucked into the drama.
 
Originally Posted By: LS2JSTS
Frankly...I'd just move on...thats just me. But crazy or just plain stupid "ex husband baggage" is too much for me to deal with. Plenty of fish in the sea.


^^Best advice. Dont get involved with chicks that have baggage.
 
We do not live together. We have been dating almost 2 years so I'm not going to boot her just yet. This is the first time we have heard about him doing this. And as I said I'd notice a car following us everywhere except maybe on a busy street.

I'm going to keep a better watch on my tail but untill I see some strange activity I won't know any more. He was known for his tall tails.

I never had a problem with their past. He divorced her and I came along years later. It's not like I stole her from him.

I Used to know what he drove and I could I.D. him.
 
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Originally Posted By: aquariuscsm
If I were in your place I'd find the guy and rip him in half.


+1

You are dealing with a serious wacko based on the situation and length of time described. Best to meet him head on rather than think twice about being followed.

Or, make a police report. At least they will know who to look for when you go missing.
 
In NY you can try for an order of protection. Usually a crime has to have been committed to get it immediately. But if you don't get it immediately then they usually set a court date.

Also you can talk to the police about stalking or harassment charges.

Or call no neck Vito.
 
Don't forget what OJ Simpson did to Ronald Goldman when he found him with Nicole. You know the rest of the story.

Make sure your Glock is loaded and ready to go when he shows up unexpectedly ..... and I'm not kidding.
 
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