Divorce

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stockrex

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I never thought it would happen to me, wife took the kids and left the house and served me with divorce papers while I was out at work,
it is been less than week so emotional about it.

I want to hear from your about dos and don't, what would you have done differently, things to watch out for.

I will still love my wife and kids and asked her to see if she wants to reconcile and come back home, but she said no, she wants me to leave the house.

Pray for us please!
 
Number one don't leave. The minute you do you will not be able to come back.

Number 2 consult a lawyer ASAP. Some specialize in men's side of things.

Good luck, I will pray for you. You'll need it.
 
Sorry to hear it-you need to get your assets frozen NOW, and put a legal notice in your local paper ASAP stating that you will not be responsible for any debts she signs your name to from now on. A good lawyer is also worth his/her weight in gold!
 
You should also make an inventory, preferably with serial numbers and pictures, of anything you own that could be taken and "given away" or sold by either spouse. My brother made this mistake, lost ALL of his automotive & household tools, "stolen" from their home & property that he didn't live at anymore (but was still paying half the mortgage & property taxes on, with an agreement that he could keep his stuff there until it was sold.
 
If she has an attorney already then get one yourself. She probably does since you were served with papers. Contact local bar assocication by email or phone for recommendations. Get at least 3 recommendations from them. Consult with each one before you choose one. Not only your comfort level with them but cost.

When I went thru a tough time listening to Joel Osteen really helped me stay positive and no I'm not the religious type at all. Usually on at 8pm sunday nights.
 
She enlisted one of the more expensive lawyers in town from what I gather.

How much can I ask to see the kids?
 
Originally Posted By: stockrex
She enlisted one of the more expensive lawyers in town from what I gather.

How much can I ask to see the kids?


Your wife cannot just take the kids.

You need to contact an attorney to help.

Sorry about this all. Keep in mind the most important thing are your kids above all.
 
Having seen many friends go through this - do not leave the house, unless you want to lose it forever.

She has an advantage, since she filed first. I have no idea what that is, but it's been a consistant theme I've heard before. Get youself a good lawyer ASAP. If you sit back and are passive and only try to reconcile - her and her lawyer are going to out game plan you and you will pay in the end.

Immediately print out bank statements for all your accounts that she has access to. Freezing the account is preferable. If you have the statements, and she drains one odds are good that you might be able to get that considered in the settlement.

Get your attorney going now. The system is ablolutely slanted to the favor of the mother who takes the kids, I don't care what anyone says. You need to get someone can take the dad's side.
 
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I will pray that you can work out a solution for everyone involved.

Google Grand Rapids Divorce Support Groups to find someone to help you legally and emotionally. There is lots of help out there.

Take a deep breath. Best wishes to you with your struggles.
 
Blindsided, I feel for you. But did you not see it coming?. Always keep in mind the kids, keep you composure for you kids. When you see the kids, don't get them involved in this problem, there already will be damaged enough from this. Get a Lawyer, see what can be settled between you too. Perhaps you can convince her to counseling to at least understand WHY this happened. God Bless You, be strong from you kids, I know it hurts big time. As for leaving your home, good advice from prior posts. She left the house and took the kids, perhaps if I was feeling in the mood, I use that against her. As she basically kidnapped the kids without consent. Don't wait a second longer, get a lawyer and get a Custody Order. This will at least give you the ability to set up visitation and stop here from leaving the state.

Read Link: http://www.divorcesupport.com/divorce/Do-Your-Fear-Your-Spouse-will-Take-the-Children--133.html
 
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I'm afraid I don't have legal advice to offer, but I will say I feel your pain, although my dissolution was much less stressful and we remained friends. Peaceful dissolution or messy divorce, it still stinks. Praying for you and your family, and that you will find the help you need.
 
The best advise posted so far is "Get a lawyer".

Freezing assets. Can you do that if they are held jointly? Don't know, thus the question.
 
Sad to hear about it. It pains my heart.
Any reasons why she left? She love somebody else?
Who is at fault here?

Just like any other negotiation, be ready to walk away from your wife and kids. It ain't worth it if she ain't worth it.
 
no signs that I saw, stay home mum but worked before, youngest is 2,
looks like she entisted lawyers few months back.
 
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