Perhaps seeking advice from people one knows that actually do what you are inquiring about...professionally. A seasoned law enforcement officer that actually carries a sidearm for a living, in this case, perhaps a female. An instructor at a well established gun club.
Or if utilizing the internet, perhaps a dedicated firearms forum, of which there are many to pick from could be a better choice to start.
I agree with seeking advice from those who know what they are talking about, generally enthusiasts who want to know as much as possible and immerse oneself in the topic. Your idea of a internet gun forum is a strong suggestion, and maybe the OP has this question on gun forums. Advice on the internet, like in life, is just gathering data points.
I would rely on gun enthusiasts, over the random cop or Soldier who might not be a gun enthusiast. I would say most are not enthusiasts. When I was in the military, I was shocked at how few "gun enthusiasts" were and even met a surprisingly high number of people who were anti-2nd Amendment! Sad, but true. As for experts, their process is much like I've suggested. Go to the top 5 or 10 makers, review what they have in striker/hammer, size, caliber, and narrow it down and start with those options. This is not a novel problem. I've taught, on my own time/money, many people how to shoot guns, including women, to try to get more people involved in the hobby lifestyle. I have a very good sense of what women gravitate towards, given hand strength and size, recoil, being comfortable, etc. It's generally compact sized hammer fired guns with excellent ergonomics. The CZ75 variants (I'll include affordable clones here, like the SAR B6P), and Sig P229 (including variations like the P6 or P225) are very popular, for many many reasons. We're not solving cancer, we're picking from a fairly small selection of practical realistic options when you boil it down. There's not millions, there's maybe a few dozen realistic suggestions within a realistic criteria of probably a compact hammer fired .380 or 9mm roughly the size of the CZ75 compact.
Asking a female cop, is problematic. First, you'll have to find one. Going up to a stranger and asking, is weird, time consuming, and a data point of 1. Next, she likely does not have a choice and is probably issued a Glock, statistically. Next, she'll probably just rely on either what she was issued as a backup, or a similar smaller gun of the same design for training simplicity. Next, if she has an option it's unlikely she'll do more than ask male gun enthusiasts, or just go with the actual gun or a smaller version of her duty gun for training overlap. I dated a female cop detective, and she carried what she was issued, a Glock. She didn't know much about any other guns b/c she was a busy mom when not playing detective.
IME that's not a very good idea, for one they need not conceal, for two a good portion of them are clueless about anything except the one they are issued.
This has been my experience with most cops.
SHE needs to find what works for her.
Wonder how many answering this question are women...
Ultimately yes. But considering men designed and built probably every gun in existence, and men dominate this arena of hobby and professional use, it seems logical to get opinions from men. I've been a member of many gun forums, engaged in gun conversations thousands of times, etc. Only a few women engage in this topic. It's just not something women get enthusiastic about in general. Men are almost universally going to aid in narrowing down the choices to a handful for a woman to pick from, so as to not have an overwhelming decision. This is my overall life experience.
The worst way to go about it is for a woman novice to go pick out something b/c she'll almost always come back with a cute little mouse gun that will be a miserable experience. She'll develop a flinch from the recoil, then put it in a drawer and forget about it. I've seen that happen and had to break people of the flinching they developed from some gun store clerk advice on a mouse gun.