How does one vanish from society?

SC Maintenance

SC Maintenance

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Lowcountry South Carolina
I had a friend I worked with years ago. When I left that company we stayed in touch - would talk maybe once a month, etc, see each other a few times a year when I was in his city, etc. He was a very likeable guy, we had lots of mutual friends.

He left and went to work for a customer of mine, and we had several mutual acquaintances at that place. One day he called to tell me he was quitting that place, said he had some personal things to deal with but was living same place and we should get together my next trip there. A month later he wouldn't respond to my emails and his phone was disconnected.

A number of mutual friends have called me over the years to see if I have ever heard from him - so obviously he wasn't just avoiding me. He has a unique name, I have tried google and all his info for places he lived to that point are still there, but nothing after that point.

So I wonder how someone disappears in todays society by choice or other. I can think of a few.

1) Death, although I think an obituary would end up on the web?
2) long term illness - end up on disability - obviously never have a residence in your name.
3) incarceration or commitment to some sort of institution? Not sure how that ends up working but I assume they would suppress that information?
4) Leave the country for whatever reason?

Thoughts? I am not really looking to reach him - my number and email have not changed and I am easy to find if he wanted although I hope he is OK. I just find it odd. Many others who ask me about him do as well.

I hope he is serving cocktails on a tropical beach somewhere, but unfortunately I doubt that is true.
 
These days deleting your FB account might count...

Have to figure, move a few states over, mail forwarding runs out (or was never set up), ditch any cell plan and change phone numbers with a new burner phone, now it becomes hard to get in touch with. Email is easy to ignore, or even change addresses again.
 
You're tracked until your last breath on this earth. No, it's not like in the movies.

Why would you want to disappear? This seems like the wrong place to ask such a question. If you're facing serious issues, seeking professional help or talking to someone you trust might be a better first step.
 
Invisible said:
You're tracked until your last breath on this earth. No, it's not like in the movies.
Click to expand...
Sure, but I think the OP isn't asking about getting away from the authorities, it's more like, not being able to be (easily) found by friends and family.
 
Invisible said:
You're tracked until your last breath on this earth. No, it's not like in the movies.

Why would you want to disappear? This seems like the wrong place to ask such a question. If you're facing serious issues, seeking professional help or talking to someone you trust might be a better first step.
Click to expand...
You should read my post before commenting.
 
RooflessVW said:
If I deleted social media, got a new phone number, and moved... And I didn't tell anyone...

How would anyone know?
Click to expand...
If your name is not unique or you never put an actual address in your name - ie sign up for utilities - then I suppose that is true.

My friends was very unique. Like I said google shows all his addresses up to that point.

I suppose its not such a great question. I more wonder why someone would decide to vanish from everyone you know assuming it wasn't nefarious? Maybe there is no reason and it was?
 
There is a place in Calif called "slab city". People go there to live off the grid and our out view of normal society. It's a bunch of old cement slab that all that is left from old army barracks (I think). No water or power. People camp there for months or years. I think there is cell phone service from a cell tower somewhere. They can go into a town to buy necessities. But I'll bet if one has a heart attack they rejoin society and go to an ER.

There was an episode of Seinfeld where Kramer went to the post office and said he wanted to give up his mailing address since with fax and email he no longer needed to get mail. They brought him in the back and grilled him that you cannot give up your mailing address and they did not want anyone telling people that mail was no longer needed.
 
SC Maintenance said:
You should read my post before commenting.
Click to expand...
I did, and it seemed like a waled question. You know when someone says: "just asking for a friend?" Something similar to that.

Social media was created for profit, and then it evolved into mapping how people network (six degrees of separation type of stuff), how they communicate, and to keep them lazy. And I mean lazy in that as long as people have a platform, they won't try to create their own. However, unless someone wants to be found on social media, they can stay out of it.

However, it's not possible to hide from the authorities. If your friend wanted to start fresh and live his old life behind, he could have done so without a leaving a trace. If you're concerned about what happened to him, you can always place your inquiry with the authorities. The most you'll be able to find out if there is a record of him having passed or being incarcerated.

Conclusively, it is possible to disappear from your friends, coworkers, even family. It is nearly impossible to hide from the authorities, even if he left the country.

ripcord said:
Not sure I would want to pay someone to "make me disappear."
Click to expand...
Like in "Breaking Bad":

1716145040734.jpg
 
Last edited:
Invisible said:
I did, and it seemed like a waled question. You know when someone says: "just asking for a friend?" Something similar to that.

Social media was created for profit, and then it evolved into mapping how people network (six degrees of separation type of stuff), how they communicate, and to keep them lazy. And I mean lazy in that as long as people have a platform, they won't try to create their own. However, unless someone wants to be found on social media, they can stay out of it.

However, it's not possible to hide from the authorities. If your friend wanted to start fresh and live his old life behind, he could have done so without a leaving a trace. If you're concerned about what happened to him, you can always place your inquiry with the authorities. The most you'll be able to find out if there is a record of him having passed or being incarcerated.

Conclusively, it is possible to disappear from your friends, coworkers, even family. It is nearly impossible to hide from the authorities, even if he left the country.


Like in "Breaking Bad":

View attachment 220083
Click to expand...
Whatever dude. You clearly didn't read my post. Three of my thoughts were death, incarceration or long term illness. Clearly not trying to hide.

This is BITOG not the conspiracy board on Reddit.
 
Death is still a highly possible option, as not everyone has an obituary after they pass.
I had a childhood friend who died several years ago. My family was close with his for decades.
He never had kids/wife etc. and just went about his business by himself.

He committed suicide and was found several weeks later by his landlord.
His sister was given the task of dealing with his belongings (which mostly went to charity).
No obituary was published and no service was held.
 
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