General Dating Rant. Calm cool reasoning.

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She could be the string along type. You know the type guys... keeps the lines of communication open "just" enough to string you along. These type of women do this until the next "best" thing comes along.

NOT saying she is this type, just mentioning it. Nobody is SO busy that they can't send a text. Morning time is perfect for banging out a few texts.
 
Originally Posted By: asiancivicmaniac
I think a lot of guys on here want women who fit the traditional gender role where they have kids and stay at home to clean, cook, and look after the kids. There are definitely women like that out there, but in this day and age there shouldn't be a negative stigma associated with women who want to be independent and do something with their lives. I mean, why should the woman in a relationship be obligated to postpone her life to raise the kids?

The woman makes the milk. Thats why she is obligated to raise the kids lol
 
My story is similar to yours. Moved to a new city at 29, decided I was sick of the bar scene so went online. Dated quite a few women that way (incidently one was a Cardiologist), and eventually met my wife.

In my experience, a decent proportion of the women there seemed to be serial daters. There are a lot of fish in that sea, and the male fish are consantly throwing themselves in the female's boat. It's pretty easy to pop from one date to the next, they have a lot of fun and no consequences. Which is all fine and good if everyone is on the same page. She wants to have fun, you want to have fun, all is good
wink.gif


Not to be a downer, it worked great for me in the end. That dynamic seemed to be more prevalant there. Maybe it's just an age group thing too...
 
She's a very busy person. Just play it by ear. If you get pushy, you'll just push yourself out of her life. There's no hurry. If it's meant to be, it will.
 
The whole "game" of attracting women is tricky. I think if you backed off a bit so she can pursue would be wise ... you've shown interest, any more and she'll think you don't have any better prospects. Keep looking.
 
Originally Posted By: Jeepster_nut
Originally Posted By: asiancivicmaniac
I think a lot of guys on here want women who fit the traditional gender role where they have kids and stay at home to clean, cook, and look after the kids. There are definitely women like that out there, but in this day and age there shouldn't be a negative stigma associated with women who want to be independent and do something with their lives. I mean, why should the woman in a relationship be obligated to postpone her life to raise the kids?

The woman makes the milk. Thats why she is obligated to raise the kids lol


+1. It amazes me how shortsighted some commentary is with respect to the natural processes (reproduction and nurturing) and what things that are done in society are not natural.

Send your kid to day care at 13 weeks to feed off of bottles? Not natural.

Cant afford it otherwise? Dont breed.

Its not sexist, its not mean, its just what nature is. Im all for mommy going and doing a great job at her job and making tons of money, AFTER the kid is old enough to be in school. But there are practical realities that coincide with that, which just are what they are...

As for this situation? Nothing wrong with the girl working 80 hour days to make herself a surgeon. Its all good. Good for her, I wish her success. But you have to take that situation and lifestyle at face value. Some aspects of it may be tough to make a relationship work, it is what it is. But all relationships take work.
 
Originally Posted By: needsducktape
UPDATE:

Just got this in my email:

"Hi hi!
I apologize for being MIA the last couple of days.... such a crazy week! 2 days of OR and coming home around 9 and 7 and passing out! We've been on a surgical whirlwind lately. Two days with the department chairman.

I am seriously craving green tea ice cream since Sunday!
Danger danger.

Still in the OR now, but not scrubbed in, so am sneaking you a quick email.

Hope you're having a great week!!
A
Sent from Android "



OK so maybe I went all paranoid too quick?? Hopefully, I will play my cards right. Personal thanks to everyone - I got a lot out of reading your opinions

By the way, I am a Modeling (yes, HOT girls) & Acting agent that is transitioning into owning my own business -high end hiking and mountaineering clothing line and personal outfitting. (Its a big jump from managing models, but I love outfitting people who are about to adventure travel)


OK, just saw this. The fact that you got that, AND the fact that she mentioned that a hike would be nice when that is your new line of work (Im sure you told her that), makes the comment a thoughtful one and means youre on the right track, IMO. Just give her time and space. But keep coming up with things to do and after a few times together, you can have a more serious talk.
 
Originally Posted By: JHZR2
Originally Posted By: needsducktape
UPDATE:

Just got this in my email:

"Hi hi!
I apologize for being MIA the last couple of days.... such a crazy week! 2 days of OR and coming home around 9 and 7 and passing out! We've been on a surgical whirlwind lately. Two days with the department chairman.

I am seriously craving green tea ice cream since Sunday!
Danger danger.

Still in the OR now, but not scrubbed in, so am sneaking you a quick email.

Hope you're having a great week!!
A
Sent from Android "



OK so maybe I went all paranoid too quick?? Hopefully, I will play my cards right. Personal thanks to everyone - I got a lot out of reading your opinions

By the way, I am a Modeling (yes, HOT girls) & Acting agent that is transitioning into owning my own business -high end hiking and mountaineering clothing line and personal outfitting. (Its a big jump from managing models, but I love outfitting people who are about to adventure travel)


OK, just saw this. The fact that you got that, AND the fact that she mentioned that a hike would be nice when that is your new line of work (Im sure you told her that), makes the comment a thoughtful one and means youre on the right track, IMO. Just give her time and space. But keep coming up with things to do and after a few times together, you can have a more serious talk.


Thanks much - I haven't even got back to her yet- I have been a twisted train wreck of nerves. (Not normally like this, with ANY girl regardless of career or looks or whatever...)

I think waiting a couple days between replies may be best- and shows that I have a life... Which is actually true, my business EXPLODED with sales this week and I have just not had a chance. (On top of other matters with other friends)I'm thinking Friday I will give a call or drop an email. -Maybe try and set something up for Saturday or Sunday...

Wish me luck.

PS to those asking for a picture - I would, but I think (since there are plenty of Pittsburgh BITOG members) it may be best to keep her id private. (I'll post when we wind up together
smile.gif
)
 
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Stop with the pictures and the games. Good night, just reply to her if you actually have time- you would want her to do the same. No wonder why so many marriages fail, we play games to figure out if we like each other. Just be honest from the get go. And stop the high school picture thing. This is a personal relationship between you and her not you, her and the thousand people on this website.

ref
 
I have an extensive dating career. Being busy is just an excuse. I've dated women who were extremely busy (they work 30 hrs a week plus are full-time college students), and they'll find time to return my calls if they're interested.

If she's as attractive as you say she is, then she's dating other people now and deciding where you fit in the list of guys she has available. I'm 101% sure of this

If you get a call back, it means she was disappointed with the other guys and wants to give you a chance. If not, then she found someone else. But don't dispair; she may call in a few months, saying she was "busy" but really what that means is she was dating someone, it didn't work out, and she's resorting to her backup option.

This is how the dating game works, like it or not.
 
Originally Posted By: JHZR2
The woman makes the milk. Thats why she is obligated to raise the kids lol

+1. It amazes me how shortsighted some commentary is with respect to the natural processes (reproduction and nurturing) and what things that are done in society are not natural.

Send your kid to day care at 13 weeks to feed off of bottles? Not natural.

Cant afford it otherwise? Dont breed.

Its not sexist, its not mean, its just what nature is. Im all for mommy going and doing a great job at her job and making tons of money, AFTER the kid is old enough to be in school. But there are practical realities that coincide with that, which just are what they are...

As for this situation? Nothing wrong with the girl working 80 hour days to make herself a surgeon. Its all good. Good for her, I wish her success. But you have to take that situation and lifestyle at face value. Some aspects of it may be tough to make a relationship work, it is what it is. But all relationships take work.




Amazing! Someone gets it. Good job on pointing out the facts regarding reproduction. A Mom is a woman, a Dad is a man. It seems so simple (and it is) but our ridiculous quest for perfect equality has tainted the whole business, and the children it produces.

And it is true that relationships require constant quality input to work. Has everyone read about 'love languages'? You must know your partner's expectations if you intend to stay married very long.

I live with a medical professional. She's not a full Doctor but she writes prescriptions and provides services to people in their homes and the hospitals. We have to carefully carve out time for ourselves from her busy schedule.
 
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Don't wait a few days to return her call/messages. That's doing exactly what you were complaining about to her...plus she may need the extra days to plan since she is so busy. You do not want to miss out on the opportunity to see her again just because you were playing the game to make her think you're not desperate. There is a fine line there. Return her call atleast by the following day. DOn't change yourself, she may like you for your promptness and availabilty...change that and you'll be just like the other guys.

Just my opinion, but I'm usually pretty good at this stuff
smile.gif
 
Oh and if she is in the medical field, she probably already deals with men who are busy like her and she therefore gets little or no dates/attention. YOU, on the other hand are more readily available and most women like a man they can depend on to be there for them....know what I am getting at here?
 
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