Main reason I don't go to bars is if I ever got a DUI I would lose all my licenses and my job
Being around people drinking alcohol
- Thread starter Duffyjr
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I'm a recovering alcoholic. I quit drinking while I was playing in a bar band, so I obviously was around drunks, including one of our guitarists who was really in a downward spiral. I prefer social situations where people aren't drinking, but I can deal with the more alcohol-fueled situations too.
I'd play in a band again, and I've been approached by a couple of people. However, I won't play with drunks, since I've been there.
I'd play in a band again, and I've been approached by a couple of people. However, I won't play with drunks, since I've been there.
I'm temporarily living with my brother, his wife and two small children. My brother is what I believe to be a 'functional alcoholic' and refuses to admit he has a drinking problem. He drinks bourbon every night. If there is a bottle of bourbon in the house he will drink half the bottle in one night. He can finish a handle of bourbon in 3-4 nights.
There has to be no alcohol in the house for him not to drink and when there is no alcohol in the house he tries to convince me to run down to the ABC....or he brings home a bottle after work. I've learned that there is NO reasoning with him as he refuses to listen to logic. When I confront him about his drinking he claims he can stop drinking tomorrow if he wanted. He did go a whole month without drinking after I convinced him he needed to try not drinking but after a month he went back to his old ways. He holds down a job fine and is a good father but feels the need to drink when they all go to sleep. It's sad to watch but he's a grown man and has to make his own choices. There's a fine line between having a drinking problem and being a regular every night heavy drinker IMHO.
There has to be no alcohol in the house for him not to drink and when there is no alcohol in the house he tries to convince me to run down to the ABC....or he brings home a bottle after work. I've learned that there is NO reasoning with him as he refuses to listen to logic. When I confront him about his drinking he claims he can stop drinking tomorrow if he wanted. He did go a whole month without drinking after I convinced him he needed to try not drinking but after a month he went back to his old ways. He holds down a job fine and is a good father but feels the need to drink when they all go to sleep. It's sad to watch but he's a grown man and has to make his own choices. There's a fine line between having a drinking problem and being a regular every night heavy drinker IMHO.
I agree with you man. The GF used to go out with friends all the time, she doesn't as much anymore, but she did last night and I picked her up, she was pretty drunk. A morning of hungover and puking, not my idea of fun. I never drink to that point anymore, I hate hangovers too much. I hope she gets there soon, its a bit annoying burning a Saturday just to have a few too many on Friday night.
I have a genetic abnormality where my body can't metabolize alcohol so it makes me break out into an allergic reaction and I end up feeling sick.
Never been drunk before.
Sometimes I wish I could throw back some beers and relax.
Just wanted to show that there's always the other side of the coin.
Never been drunk before.
Sometimes I wish I could throw back some beers and relax.
Just wanted to show that there's always the other side of the coin.
JHZR2
Staff member
I don't mind going to a bar with friends and getting food and beer like maybe once a year. Doing so still should be restrained to a few beers and designated drivers or a smart way home.
If I'm drinking, more than two or three beers, glasses of wine, or mixed drinks is enough from an enjoyment, calorie, cost and need perspective, personally. Usually if it's a social event I'll have two drinks, if it's just my wife, child and I, more often than not it will be zero, but occasionally it will be one.
If I'm drinking, more than two or three beers, glasses of wine, or mixed drinks is enough from an enjoyment, calorie, cost and need perspective, personally. Usually if it's a social event I'll have two drinks, if it's just my wife, child and I, more often than not it will be zero, but occasionally it will be one.
Originally Posted By: OneEyeJack
I've sometimes wondered what it would be like to go into a bar or tavern and have a drink but I've never done it. I've seen people stumble out or get thrown out and keeps me moving on.
I've wondered that too sometimes, but then I think back to what it was like when I was 15 and my best friend was struck and killed by a drunk driver. R.I.P. my friend....
I've sometimes wondered what it would be like to go into a bar or tavern and have a drink but I've never done it. I've seen people stumble out or get thrown out and keeps me moving on.
I've wondered that too sometimes, but then I think back to what it was like when I was 15 and my best friend was struck and killed by a drunk driver. R.I.P. my friend....
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I can't stand being around drunks. I absolutely HATE bars,it feels like I'm surrounded by overgrown children. Women that drink are repulsive. When I'd meet a chick and she wanted to go to a bar for a first date,I'd either try to get out of it,cut the date short,or if I had to suffer through it,there would be no second date,no way! And if you notice,people that drink on a regular basis always look soooo old. They always seem to look tired and worn out. I'll see people my age (47) that look like they're pushing 70+. THAT is what alcohol does to you.
It's only fun to be around drunks when you're drunk yourself. To everyone else, the intoxicated ones become more and more obnoxious as their inhibitions and self control decrease.
I wouldn't say you're a hypocrite. You're just able to spot bad behavior now that you aren't drinking to excess.
I wouldn't say you're a hypocrite. You're just able to spot bad behavior now that you aren't drinking to excess.
I don't mind the occasional happy hour. Prob Bar Louie since it's a nice upscale atmosphere. Don't like some of the neighborhood watering holes since it's the same people there every time, regulars. Bar Louie has dollar burger night, I get the turkey burger, half price apps during HH, $3 craft beers etc. Business people go there and other professionals, good mix of people. Get in and get out instead of lingering all night at the same place. Very low turnover among staff and other nightly specials like dollar beer night on domestic bottles. A fair amount of people that go there don't get alcohol. Lots of scenery there too.
The worst feeling is the next day when you're a little groggy or dopey...no thanks.
The worst feeling is the next day when you're a little groggy or dopey...no thanks.
Duffy, I think the real issue here was your decision to begin drinking again. You obviously felt your control was insufficient 6 years ago which led you quit completely, and were dry for 6 years. What changed now? Why do you believe that you can control it? What made you reverse course and begin to drink?
I think the difficulty you have being around others who drink excessively perhaps comes from the part of you that can identify with that behavior, it's your mind's way of saying "NO!" to yourself. That would suggest you're not totally comfortable drinking again..that you don't really have confidence in your ability to be a "Moderate" drinker. If you haven't done the work....gone into good therapy to understand your limitations...then there's a real risk here in your wishful thinking that "Just" a beer is OK. I bet that's the rationale you used when you began drinking long ago, too. How'd that turn out?
I think the difficulty you have being around others who drink excessively perhaps comes from the part of you that can identify with that behavior, it's your mind's way of saying "NO!" to yourself. That would suggest you're not totally comfortable drinking again..that you don't really have confidence in your ability to be a "Moderate" drinker. If you haven't done the work....gone into good therapy to understand your limitations...then there's a real risk here in your wishful thinking that "Just" a beer is OK. I bet that's the rationale you used when you began drinking long ago, too. How'd that turn out?
Do you think that if "drinking" was not such a cash cow for business from the sale and merchandising of liquor to the legal system and all the various aspects of healthcare that is would be tolerated like it is, today? Oh, and don't forget liquor's partner, tobacco.
Combine these two and you have quite an economic machine that is completely immersed within our culture. Taking God, self determination, families and parenting out of our culture is a walk in the park compared with messing around with booze and tobacco.
Combine these two and you have quite an economic machine that is completely immersed within our culture. Taking God, self determination, families and parenting out of our culture is a walk in the park compared with messing around with booze and tobacco.
Doesn't bother me too much.
But there's a curious smug pleasure to see otherwise decent folk come through in all their glory at 'society' functions after a few belts. Shocking, actually.
Makes me proud of my sobriety.
But there's a curious smug pleasure to see otherwise decent folk come through in all their glory at 'society' functions after a few belts. Shocking, actually.
Makes me proud of my sobriety.
You're right, and not a hypocrite. I never noticed how obnoxious intoxicated people were until I was sober in their presence.
Originally Posted By: OneEyeJack
Do you think that if "drinking" was not such a cash cow for business from the sale and merchandising of liquor to the legal system and all the various aspects of healthcare that is would be tolerated like it is, today? Oh, and don't forget liquor's partner, tobacco.
Combine these two and you have quite an economic machine that is completely immersed within our culture. Taking God, self determination, families and parenting out of our culture is a walk in the park compared with messing around with booze and tobacco.
It's best not to even start drinking. For the record I drink zero alcohol.
Do you think that if "drinking" was not such a cash cow for business from the sale and merchandising of liquor to the legal system and all the various aspects of healthcare that is would be tolerated like it is, today? Oh, and don't forget liquor's partner, tobacco.
Combine these two and you have quite an economic machine that is completely immersed within our culture. Taking God, self determination, families and parenting out of our culture is a walk in the park compared with messing around with booze and tobacco.
It's best not to even start drinking. For the record I drink zero alcohol.
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I drank socially in bars in my late 20's,had alot of fun,did ALOT of stupid things,lived it up with no regrets.
Now that I'm older,drinking does nothing for me.I do not drink alcohol at all now. I've got more of a healthy lifestyle now and thats a choice that I value every day.
Now that I'm older,drinking does nothing for me.I do not drink alcohol at all now. I've got more of a healthy lifestyle now and thats a choice that I value every day.
Originally Posted By: Noey
Duffy, I think the real issue here was your decision to begin drinking again. You obviously felt your control was insufficient 6 years ago which led you quit completely, and were dry for 6 years. What changed now? Why do you believe that you can control it? What made you reverse course and begin to drink?
I think the difficulty you have being around others who drink excessively perhaps comes from the part of you that can identify with that behavior, it's your mind's way of saying "NO!" to yourself. That would suggest you're not totally comfortable drinking again..that you don't really have confidence in your ability to be a "Moderate" drinker. If you haven't done the work....gone into good therapy to understand your limitations...then there's a real risk here in your wishful thinking that "Just" a beer is OK. I bet that's the rationale you used when you began drinking long ago, too. How'd that turn out?
Looking at my post again my time line might not of been clear.
Summer 2000 and prior, heavy drinking mainly on week nights right after work up until dinner, two or more. Most Friday nights were spent in a local tavern from right after work until 9ish, once in a while Id close it down. I was a mason for over 20 years and most all the bricklayers I worked with drank. Pier pressure?
Summer 2000 - 2005ish, not a drop. Got sick and tired of waking up sick and tired. I was 43.
2005ish - 2008ish maybe six a year socially, again one or two at a time. I also went back to college to learn a new trade during this time so drinking would of been a distraction.
2008is - present, I'll buy a six pack and have one a night then I might go a few days/weeks with out until I buy more. But I am like the poster that talked about his brother, if its in the house I'll drink it but I have enough control to only have one. I have confidence I will never return to being a drunk.
I've was never told I was an alcoholic but I knew I was, runs in the family. I quit cold turkey on my own, woke up one morning and said that's it I'm done. I feel very fortunate I never hurt anyone but myself, oh and my wife never left me.
I started again because I really like the taste of a good beer. Moose Head from my days going to Canada on fishing trips with my father in-law, St Paulie Girl from my days stationed in Germany. Nothing like a Nebraska corn feed rib eye/new yorker with a stout beer.
Thanks everyone for sharing.
Duffy, I think the real issue here was your decision to begin drinking again. You obviously felt your control was insufficient 6 years ago which led you quit completely, and were dry for 6 years. What changed now? Why do you believe that you can control it? What made you reverse course and begin to drink?
I think the difficulty you have being around others who drink excessively perhaps comes from the part of you that can identify with that behavior, it's your mind's way of saying "NO!" to yourself. That would suggest you're not totally comfortable drinking again..that you don't really have confidence in your ability to be a "Moderate" drinker. If you haven't done the work....gone into good therapy to understand your limitations...then there's a real risk here in your wishful thinking that "Just" a beer is OK. I bet that's the rationale you used when you began drinking long ago, too. How'd that turn out?
Looking at my post again my time line might not of been clear.
Summer 2000 and prior, heavy drinking mainly on week nights right after work up until dinner, two or more. Most Friday nights were spent in a local tavern from right after work until 9ish, once in a while Id close it down. I was a mason for over 20 years and most all the bricklayers I worked with drank. Pier pressure?
Summer 2000 - 2005ish, not a drop. Got sick and tired of waking up sick and tired. I was 43.
2005ish - 2008ish maybe six a year socially, again one or two at a time. I also went back to college to learn a new trade during this time so drinking would of been a distraction.
2008is - present, I'll buy a six pack and have one a night then I might go a few days/weeks with out until I buy more. But I am like the poster that talked about his brother, if its in the house I'll drink it but I have enough control to only have one. I have confidence I will never return to being a drunk.
I've was never told I was an alcoholic but I knew I was, runs in the family. I quit cold turkey on my own, woke up one morning and said that's it I'm done. I feel very fortunate I never hurt anyone but myself, oh and my wife never left me.
I started again because I really like the taste of a good beer. Moose Head from my days going to Canada on fishing trips with my father in-law, St Paulie Girl from my days stationed in Germany. Nothing like a Nebraska corn feed rib eye/new yorker with a stout beer.
Thanks everyone for sharing.
I can see your finger wagging through the screen.
Originally Posted By: Noey
Duffy, I think the real issue here was your decision to begin drinking again. You obviously felt your control was insufficient 6 years ago which led you quit completely, and were dry for 6 years. What changed now? Why do you believe that you can control it? What made you reverse course and begin to drink?
I think the difficulty you have being around others who drink excessively perhaps comes from the part of you that can identify with that behavior, it's your mind's way of saying "NO!" to yourself. That would suggest you're not totally comfortable drinking again..that you don't really have confidence in your ability to be a "Moderate" drinker. If you haven't done the work....gone into good therapy to understand your limitations...then there's a real risk here in your wishful thinking that "Just" a beer is OK. I bet that's the rationale you used when you began drinking long ago, too. How'd that turn out?
Originally Posted By: Noey
Duffy, I think the real issue here was your decision to begin drinking again. You obviously felt your control was insufficient 6 years ago which led you quit completely, and were dry for 6 years. What changed now? Why do you believe that you can control it? What made you reverse course and begin to drink?
I think the difficulty you have being around others who drink excessively perhaps comes from the part of you that can identify with that behavior, it's your mind's way of saying "NO!" to yourself. That would suggest you're not totally comfortable drinking again..that you don't really have confidence in your ability to be a "Moderate" drinker. If you haven't done the work....gone into good therapy to understand your limitations...then there's a real risk here in your wishful thinking that "Just" a beer is OK. I bet that's the rationale you used when you began drinking long ago, too. How'd that turn out?
Nick1994
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I've never been drunk before. Actually I've never drinken before (I'm 21). Have no desire to drink and have absolutely no desire to go to a bar and hang out with drunk people. I just don't see the point in drinking.
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