RAV4 with third row is kinda hard to find. Some people didn't like them, as you lose some cubby holes in the trunk; and access to the rear is tight. The rearmost seats are also very small, so I'm not sure if 10 years old and up might mind the seats too small. But you can drop one of the seats in the third row, and retain *some* cargo space.
The I4 is "sufficent", the V6 is noticably more powerful; but more thirsty in the city. Third row does add more stiff rear springs, so it won't sag as much; but only the V6 can have tow prep package (not all V6's get tow prep, and none of the I4's get tow prep).
I did see some company that sells an add-in rear seat. Like $1,200 for a third row that you could add to a non-third row RAV4. That might be a possibility.
One thing we run into is that it is tough to get three booster seats across a back row (normal 2nd row). My Jetta won't do it. Wife's Camry just fits three. We did not measure the RAV4 for width (doah!), since we assumed we'd only get one with third row. Our two kids are close in age, and thus they share friends of similar age, and thus it's not too hard to have to bring two extra kids around at times...
Older V6 models did have a transmission issue, which didn't seem to impact reliability--but there was a recall. Also the water pumps can fail early, and for at least the V6 you drop the engine to replace (nothing cheap!). Beyond that, I do beleive it's typical Toyota reliability.
Oh: RAV4 still has the swing out gate. If you are in Chicago that might be a nuisance, as it swings towards the curb, not away.
Minivans have their uses... I'm not enamored with them, as they are hard on automatic transmissions (I think only Sienna has escaped that issue). The electric sliding doors are slow, and known to have issues at high miles. Thirsty in the city. But, easy to get into and out of.
What else... Been a while since I looked at Mazada5. Forget if that has third row. And never looked at Suburban/etc.
We make do (currently) with our Camry. Will fit 5 persons. We have a smaller inflatable booster for when the load is mom and four kids. But we often take two cars instead of putting 5 into the Camry, if we can. Had to measure the back seat width first (before buying the Camry) to make sure it was wide enough--I'd take a tape measure and measure between armrests if you test drive anything. I forget the required width measurement, the seats are like 16 inches wide, but for some reason I'm thinking you need more width than that.