Renegotiating salary offer, should be done or not?

MoneyJohn

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Would the parking cost be a tax write off?
AFAIK, No. It is a commuting expense. You can write it off only if you are traveling between offices, or you are a remote worker and going to the office for job related activity.
 

MoneyJohn

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Being the only person who has ever worked I'd be psyched if my wife worked just to fully fund retirement accounts.
My point exactly.

Agreed that our life had been not what we expected for the last decade due to our son's medical issues and expenses. Crossing fingers that all seems well now, and we can focus on building the retirement nest. Of course, it would be great if she can bring in a few grands, but that is not our necessity. We get by just fine with my salary alone, so her compensation is a supplement, an extra 401K would go a long way in the next 20 years.
But that didn't quite appease her, so I posted here, expecting most unbiased opinions.

I liked @Donald 's suggestion. I think that's much better than starting on a wrong foot. She can prove herself by then (I have no doubt that she will), and then offer concrete reasons why she should be given the raise.
 

MoneyJohn

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She should do it. And you should help her prep for the conversation. By in large women have a tougher time asking for more money than men. Not all women just generalizing. I have to pester my wife before she’ll even think about a raise. While I’m always looking for an opportunity to negotiate raise.

The way I figure it businesses have no issues increasing prices. Why should I?
I do like your suggestion, but as I said, she has been out of work for a decade and have been trying for a good times with no offer. I even understand why she didn't counter and just took what she offered (Her confidence is really shot). I understand where she is coming from with renegotiation, but it really concerns me if she would be starting on a wrong foot.
 
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In today's job market I think she could ask for more money. If they say no, she could always find a new job.

just my $0.02
 
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I've hired in a few people. Some negotiate their salary and some accept our first offer. Nothing wrong with negotiating. Especially in this job market. The business would rather make you happy and keep you than underpay you and have you leave after a year. The offer has not been accepted in writing. Contact the employer and tell them the parking costs are a lot more expensive than what you anticipated and the offer is not sufficient. Then tell them what you want. Give them a number. They might easily be able to meet it. You don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate.

My old boss was involved in a negotiations seminar some years back. They divided the people into two teams. One buyer team and one seller team. Very eye opening to see how much lower the seller could go and how much higher the buyer could go.
 
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This is the key point to me... she made a promise... set aside whether papers were signed, legal recourse, the job market, etc. ... she made a promise.

Absent material misrepresentation on the part of the employer, she failed to do her due diligence and rushed into a decision she now regrets... but she made a promise. Sure the employer cannot legally require her to keep her word, but it should not have to... character is driven internally, not by employment law externalities.

In today's world there is little loyalty either way between employers and employees, but a man (or woman's) word has to mean something does it not? She made a deal, she made a promise... she should honor her word.

I find in most of these cases the situation is not "tricky" the correct course is usually patently obvious... it is just hard, or not what one wants to do, and folks are seeking "permission" or "confirmation" from strangers to take a path they know is wrong...

I am not criticizing anyone's choices, I am not their priest or their father... but you asked for input, so there it is...
I employ 24 people and feel the same way you do although more often than not it means I live up to each and every promise I make and staff do not. Whether it's what have you done for me lately or the idea that I owe them certain things I do not, I'm constantly disappointed with people, but I sleep well at night.
 
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I do like your suggestion, but as I said, she has been out of work for a decade and have been trying for a good times with no offer. I even understand why she didn't counter and just took what she offered (Her confidence is really shot). I understand where she is coming from with renegotiation, but it really concerns me if she would be starting on a wrong foot.
I hear you. That’s why she needs your help.

I wouldn’t listen to hardliners saying she should just gut it out cause a deal is a deal. This isn’t buying a used lawnmower from your neighbor. It’s a career and business decision. Anyone who advocates willingly staying in a disadvantageous business position is outside of their mind IMO. If she is locked in under contract or just flat out loves the job and doesn’t care about the money that is one thing. But if neither then negotiations are open.

Changes orders, contract amendments, courts appeals, etc all exist for a reason.
 
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You never asked for a raise and/or changed jobs in your entire life? Worked the same job for the same pay your whole life? If not then you went back on your word.
I never made promises I could not keep... I know it is strange, but when I give my word, I keep it.
 
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@LegalEagles - How can this even be something asked for and agreed on? She agreed to this so she can never leave?
I did not say it was legally enforceable of course it is not... that pesky 13th amendment and all... but the original poster did not ask if she COULD leave or renegotiate of course she can... he asked if she SHOULD... big difference in my mind... if I verbally promise to sell a piece of land to someone, that verbal promise if not legally enforceable (statute of frauds), so I COULD back out... but I made a promise and gave my word, so legal enforceability aside, I follow through.

Life would be pretty horrible if we all operated on the moral level of "well it is not legally enforceable"...
 
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So you stayed at the same job for the same wage your entire career? I feel as though you are conflating two separate things.
I never promised an employer: "I will stay here for 5 years." I never made that promise because I would not want to be so constrained. But if I did make such a promise, I would make darn sure I understood and complied with the terms. It is not that she took the job... it is that she made a promise... but as I said, I am no one's priest... do what you want...

Now if after a year of good performance she wanted to ask for a raise, go ahead and test the waters, but for now, a deal is a deal...
 
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You never asked for a raise and/or changed jobs in your entire life? Worked the same job for the same pay your whole life? If not then you went back on your word.
There is a difference between asking for a raise during your annual performance review (which should actually be based on your performance) and asking for a raise after a week (because you failed in your due diligence). When I'm dealing with staff more often than not they are conflating two ideas that of course make them believe they have justification for their decision - ex. People ask for raises all the time so it's totally cool to ask for a raise after 1 month or every 3 months.
 
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There is something else going on here that we don't know about.
Given today's job/employment market, for a person to have no luck finding a job after 7-8 months of looking doesn't make sense, particularly in the healthcare industry.
Another thing that doesn't make sense is the prospective employer's having her make a verbal commitment to stay 5 years. I didn't hear anything about them making the same commitment to her. Personally, I would NEVER make that kind of a promise to a prospective employer.
IMO she should keep looking. She should just respectfully decline their offer because it doesn't make economic sense, and that is what she should tell them. This won't look bad on her job record because she did not actually work there.
 
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She should just respectfully decline their offer because it doesn't make economic sense, and that is what she should tell them.
She should have done this before accepting the offer... you cannot decline an offer you already accepted... that is not negotiation, that is buyer's remorse... offer + acceptance = deal.

I admit, I may be seeing this as a black and white issue, but by god, they had a deal...

Now if there was a serious reason she could not perform, like illness or death in the family, relocation, or a new baby, I would be more willing to excuse non-performance... in this case however she wants to renegotiate because she will be making less profit than she initially anticipated... never ever sacrifice principles for lucre.

This is a very interesting discussion... I am enjoying the different points of view...
 
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There is a difference between asking for a raise during your annual performance review (which should actually be based on your performance) and asking for a raise after a week (because you failed in your due diligence).
I tend to agree. However it sounds as though the lady did not have the skills required to negotiate properly. I would never let my wife or family remain in disadvantageous financial position if I could help it nor would I advocate someone else do so. I would protect mine to a fault.
 
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If she hasnt signed on with HR etc yet she isnt hired. I wouldnt have a problem asking for a parking allowance if its that high. esp if it wasnt mentioned up front. of course you give no idea of salary..
is this 25k, 40k, 75k, 125k(know plenty of RN over 100k) makes a difference.
 
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I tend to agree. However it sounds as though the lady did not have the skills required to negotiate properly. I would never let my wife or family remain in disadvantageous financial position if I could help it nor would I advocate someone else do so. I would protect mine to a fault.
Well as I said, I tend to be a sucker and as the more savvy employer would probably give in and renegotiate only to have her leave 6 months later because someone else offered her $1.00 more per hour even though they pay less of her health insurance which will cost her an additional $2.00 per hour. Yes, that was an actual example in which she left but then wanted to come back because the other employer was mean but now she wanted $3.00/hr more. It's a game for everyone other than the employers who need staff to make money to you know pay the staff.
 
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