MSDS for Wimen

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MolaKule

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Iowegia - USA
Material Safety Data Sheet | Woman

Element Name: Woman

Symbol: WO2

Discoverer: Adam

Atomic Mass: Accepted at 118lb but known to vary from 100 to 550 lb

Occurrence: Copious quantities in urban areas

Physical properties:
1. Surface usually covered with painted film
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states

Chemical properties:
1. Has a great affinity for gold, silver, platinum and precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason
4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased in saturation in alcohol
5. Most powerful money-reducing agent known

Common uses:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be great aid to relaxation

Tests:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside better specimen

Hazards:
Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
 
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Then there was the man who came to work with 2 black eyes. When a co-worker asked what happened the man replied, "I thought my wife said 'stand up' when she actually said 'shut up'!"
 
Originally Posted By: MolaKule
Then there was the man who came to work with 2 black eyes. When a co-worker asked what happened the man replied, "I thought my wife said 'stand up' when she actually said 'shut up'!"

HA! My sweet diminutive Grandma said that all the time.
 
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Love it! Some possible additions:

Common Names: Babe, Bird, Broad, Chick, Dame, Dish, Filly, Gal, Girl, Lassie, Mama, Sheila, Skirt, Ball & Chain

Flash point below test threshold
Extremely volatile
Easily converts to an excited state
Powerful reducing agent for wealth
Changes form, color, and appearance frequently
Softens when combined with chocolate
Reproduces spontaneously at will
Relieves tension when treated gently
Should only be handled by those skilled in the art
Rapidly absorbs wallets and bank accounts

Tom NJ
 
verbotten and legislated against in Oz workplaces...i.e. it is an offence to place the MSDS on a bulletin board in the workplace.
 
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