To each his own on this sort of thing,
Of you top three, we were between two of them...actually had money down on a Lexus RX 350, similar to a Highlander.
Drove downstate 3-4 hours to drive some vehicles and went with the Acura RDX...hands down for us.
The deciding factors were:
1) Seats - the Acura has 16 way adjustable on both driver and passenger...including lumbar inn and out, lumbar up and down, bolster, and seat extension.
2) Transmission - the Lexus seemed “indecisive”, seemed to always want to always upshift...and had a delay when you accelerated to pass.
3) All wheel drive system - we live in a snow belt region and had always considered Subaru and Audi as having the top AWD drive systems...as I read up on it, the Acura SH-AWD System is top notch...putting the power to the wheel with traction.
4) Price - the Lexus RDX 350 was seven to nine grand more...