Elderly driving, taking away their keys.

Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
2,600
Location
california
It has become exceedingly obvious that my mother should not pilot a vehicle anymore.

She's always been a car person.

Wants to go out 3 or more times a day, even when there is no reason to go out, just to get out of the house.

I told her she could no longer drive, and she ignored me.

Angered at being dismissed, I told her the state was revoking her driver's license,( untrue, as of yet) and this was like a slap across her face.

She's crushed, laying in bed sobbing.

This is Not a good feeling.
 
I went through the same thing with my Dad. I got him to agree to meet with his Doctor for an evaluation, which they will do.
She told him it was not his age; many people his age are OK to drive. Of course he failed the test.
On the way home Dad told me he was gonna keep driving, "She's young; what does she know?"
I hid the keys. Ultimately we got a live-in home care giver.

Good luck. We will all be there one day.
 
Have her evaluated; her liability, her well-being, ethical responsibility to other drivers....

I was once hit head on by an 88 y/o on a rainy night; the road curved, she didn't. Apparently, she had had a few incidents and this one was the icing on the cake, the local PD informed the registry and that was the end of her license. Sad, difficult, but necessary.
 
Saturday she had pole position, ignored a left red arrow. Drove off with the cars going straight. Turned into opposing lane of cars going straight.

Car is totalled.
All airbags deployed.
What do you mean, pole position? Was she racing somebody? Otherwise it sounds like an accident that could have happened to someone of any age. Has this occurred before? If not, maybe make sure she gets a small car so there is less chance of others getting injured or killed or one with lots of automatic driver assistance systems like automatic braking and lane keeping.
 
Last edited:
My Dad had a fit when we took his keys, pushing 85 years, gave him back his keys and the first thing he did was rear-end another car, took him to his Doctor, was not happy when the Doc grounded him. :LOL:
 
She made a mistake and is okay.

I would see what transpires next before jumping to loss of license by forcing potentially damaging your relationship.
I agree with this. My grandmother backed into a crane truck at a local business causing severe damage to her car and pulled out in front of another vehicle on a state highway totaling the other vehicle all in the same year. She was in her upper 70's and had never had an accident, ticket, anything. She drove for several more years without the slightest issue. When I say drove, she was behind the wheel of a 3/4 ton farm truck with a hay bed for several hours a day at times. She ran her cattle operation all by herself up until her early 80s.
 
What do you mean, pole position? Was she racing somebody? Otherwise it sounds like an accident that could have happened to someone of any age. Has this occurred before? If not, maybe make sure she gets a small car so there is less chance of others getting injured or killed.
That's a ridiculous solution for someone who is losing cognitive/motor skills abilities.
 
I had to take my dad's keys when he started showing signs of Alzheimer's.
One of the most difficult things I had to do was take the keys away from my 87 year old father. He had the body of a healthy 60 year old but was losing it cognitively. He was a car guy for his entire life, tri-power Pontiacs, SS Chevys, the whole deal. His last car was a MINT 1999 Buick Regal GS with the supercharged 3800 V6. He still hand washed that car until the last couple of years of his life. I still feel sad about the situation.

Scott
 
Fortunately I did not have to pursue anything WRT my parents as others have had to do.

Unfortunately, the entire situation would appear to me to be fraught with legal pitfalls and ripe for abuse; that being said, it probably should be pursued if necessary.

Licensed fully skilled drivers cause accidents too; who is really qualified to indicate skills are diminished unless an accident occurs. Can children legally prevent parents from driving?

Wouldn't it be convenient for kids with s-boxes suddenly have access to an unused grand marquis. Just an example.... Not every kid is driven by noble intentions.
 
Saturday she had pole position, ignored a left red arrow. Drove off with the cars going straight. Turned into opposing lane of cars going straight.

Car is totalled.
All airbags deployed.
My grandma did something similar.

If you saw pics of the 1997? 1998? Toyota Avalon, you'd be amazed nobody died including her. The front of the car was gone...
 
That's a ridiculous solution for someone who is losing cognitive/motor skills abilities.
Yeah, I agree.

Reminds me of when someone suggested having a firearm on them suggested that wouldn't even the odds of defense against someone else approaching them with a firearm or something like that.

Now, staying on topic..
 
  • Like
Reactions: CKN
Back
Top