And the longer the statement, the less likely it is to mean anything. At all. But you can bet the person who gave that speech got a nice Christmas bonus, just after the annual layoffs to make that bonus possible.
Corporate word salad
- Thread starter dogememe
- Start date
"Mad Libs" was a game where words were omitted from a complete paragraph. They were published in paperback form as many puzzle books still are.
The leader would say, "Give me a noun" and he'd write it down. Then, "Give me a verb" and he'd write it down; etc.
When 20 or so random words were listed, the leader would read the paragraph with the odd words plugged in. It was great fun.
Sonny Fox (RIP) would do this on the original, "Wonderama", a locally produced children's show in NYC.
It was corporatespeak then.
The leader would say, "Give me a noun" and he'd write it down. Then, "Give me a verb" and he'd write it down; etc.
When 20 or so random words were listed, the leader would read the paragraph with the odd words plugged in. It was great fun.
Sonny Fox (RIP) would do this on the original, "Wonderama", a locally produced children's show in NYC.
It was corporatespeak then.
Typically, technical expertise is inversely proportional to the amount of text needed to describe something. I would bet whoever wrote that couldn't tell you the difference between a torque converter and a clutch plate.
It's probably AI barf, but the use of "thoughtfully curated" is just...no. No. The use of that phrase is entirely improper in that context. Gross.
You might get something resembling:
“at every moment in time, and certainly this one, to see the moment in time in which we exist and are present, and to be able to contextualize it, to understand where we exist in the history and in the moment as it relates not only to the past, but the future"
That's funny because, yeah, the "curated" part made me think something was really amiss. It's not a high dollar resort composing a fancy vacation menu for you -- it's a transmission rebuild!!
People believe their Tv news.
I couldn'ta said it better myself.
And they're often stupid and feel the need to sound like the TV news.
Again, we've been trained to regard questions as a weakness.
Always just say things....the angrier, the more sweeping, the better.
Ever hear an old timer condense The Great Depression or World War II into one sentence? It's infuriating.
Owen Lucas
$100 Site Donor 2023
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2021
- Messages
- 2,585
You have the younger generations thinking its okay to use slang in email. "hi friend"??? Some businesses want to seem hip most of the population, I presume, most of us just want old fashioned formalities and common terminology like customer service not customer success. It just sounds corny.
I could make a point of the older generations putting the body of the email in the subject line, or in all caps. Some of the younger generations who have just joined the career force may not have ever been exposed to the required professionalism and could be taught the proper way.
In either cases, any emails that I get that contain "could you kindly" or "friend" is usually created from some center over seas. I don't blame them though, the message they're conveying gets through.
Did you deal with the general public? The lady friend worked at a dental office and she'd get those type of emails/texts from everyone. We don't deal with the public so I've never been exposed to emails like that - all our clients/vendors always start off professional but depending on the work relationship, we may converse with relaxed words. I assume it's also in a case-by-case basis. Some things like (for example) if I got an email from a want-to-be vendor containing 'ain't' versus 'isn't' then it's going straight into the trash.
But if I was say, working at AMS Performance, I would totally expect those types of emails left and right.
Not exactly sure that the subjunctive mood does that.
Yes. That business had nothing to do with Amsoil. Motorized bike accessories - https://www.ebay.com/usr/brook45izy - customers ranged from the very young, the stoned, the drunk, the old the infirmed, the retired, the lost DL, mostly male, lots of very knowledgeable DIY gear heads to complete hacks. Some could only pay Paypal. Some only could buy if we used Facebook. Some lived by phone only. Sales were 65% CC, 30% PP, remainder check, cash, money transfer of some sort.
Actually never received one (message in subject) in Amsoil correspondence.
No thanks, I'd probably go crazy if I was in your shoes reading those emails. The worst emails I get are "call me".
The synergistic flow of your synthetic lubricant and synergy with your robust metal alloys within the core of your engine will reward you with unprecedented joy where you can extract future funds from the time you will save from the lubricant life where accountability will flow downstream through profits where the exuberant costs of cheap Chinese goods will be stopped dead on arrival to ensure the future of man maintains a robust balance in a controlled fashion through progressive team building skills.
Most of today's corp speech is not to make you happy, but to make sure you have no way to sue them if you are angry.
Similar to the message given on a New York City subway car that is not moving: "We are sorry for the delay, but will be moving just as soon as congestion ahead is gone"
Well that always made me feel better as it would be kind of silly of them to not start up just as soon as the congestion ahead is gone
Well that always made me feel better as it would be kind of silly of them to not start up just as soon as the congestion ahead is gone
