Quit asking. You are supposed to be life partners, not a mother - child relationship.
I will discuss anything and everything with my wife, and I expect the same from her, but I will never, ever "ask permission". Ain't gonna happen.
Advice on making the old lady see reason. RE vehicle shopping
- Thread starter mattd
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Quit asking. You are supposed to be life partners, not a mother - child relationship.
I will discuss anything and everything with my wife, and I expect the same from her, but I will never, ever "ask permission". Ain't gonna happen.
Grow a set sir.
Matt, there are a few options based on what you said:
1) Finance over a longer term so the payment is still $350 a month, this will likely be better these days (low interest) but still it is a debt, with gap insurance cost being higher and interest payment being higher. I am not sure if your wife likes that but it is an option.
2) Wait till you save up enough to reduce the payment to $350, it may take some time and rent a truck to haul the camper for a few trips but it will work. You'll have to find a way for other pickup duty but maybe you will realize you don't need it.
3) If you use your truck for work, are you able to reimburse or expense it (running your own business? or just doing it for your boss for free)? It may justify it if you do some "financial engineering" that way.
4) Alternative trips, or have trip expense budget moved to truck to pay for it (at least on the accounting side) to convince your wife
5) Just try a different kind of trucks so they will be affordable. I know you are a Ford guy and a diesel mechanic but maybe there are cheaper ways of doing things. If a new truck only last 11 years where you are then it is not a bad idea to get a cheap truck when it is expensive the upgrade when it is cheap. They all don't last forever anyways.
1) Finance over a longer term so the payment is still $350 a month, this will likely be better these days (low interest) but still it is a debt, with gap insurance cost being higher and interest payment being higher. I am not sure if your wife likes that but it is an option.
2) Wait till you save up enough to reduce the payment to $350, it may take some time and rent a truck to haul the camper for a few trips but it will work. You'll have to find a way for other pickup duty but maybe you will realize you don't need it.
3) If you use your truck for work, are you able to reimburse or expense it (running your own business? or just doing it for your boss for free)? It may justify it if you do some "financial engineering" that way.
4) Alternative trips, or have trip expense budget moved to truck to pay for it (at least on the accounting side) to convince your wife
5) Just try a different kind of trucks so they will be affordable. I know you are a Ford guy and a diesel mechanic but maybe there are cheaper ways of doing things. If a new truck only last 11 years where you are then it is not a bad idea to get a cheap truck when it is expensive the upgrade when it is cheap. They all don't last forever anyways.
Now it all makes sense - to me at least.
Your wife is scared she's going to lose you due to a recent brush with no income. She realizes you will not live forever and the more debt you acquire, the more burden on your family (especially her) if you should injure yourself again - or God forbid should you perish early.
You need to give her time to understand that life is worth living and nothing lasts forever.
In that time you can get in shape, start frequenting the gym, eat better and save money.
Being a heavy duty mechanic is horribly detrimental to your body...she understands this too.
Once you can show her that you are doing your best to mitigate the risks, I'm almost certain she'll come around. At which point you'll have restored your health, built up a nice deposit in your bank account and most importantly given her reason to trust your decision for a new(er) truck to enjoy with the family.
I LOVE cheap debt. Under 3% and lets go!
We were able to find a compromise and found a vehicle with more mileage than I orignally wanted but still is a later model. Thanks for everyone’s input. It is about 30% less than what I originally posted as a number. I have to travel over 2 hours to get it, nothing was more local. It has most of the options I orignally wanted. It’s a fully loaded XLT vs a lariat.
My plan is now to set a side X number of dollars each pay check to put aside for any major unforeseen repairs or “modifcations” I want to do to the truck as time goes on.
My plan is now to set a side X number of dollars each pay check to put aside for any major unforeseen repairs or “modifcations” I want to do to the truck as time goes on.
Can I ask what kind of work you do that needs a truck? Secondly, if you need a truck for your job, do they reimburse you for the miles? I ask because I have seen that comment before and I wonder, unless your self employed, how can your employer expect you to have such a large vehicle and not compensate you for it. I found a way around a truck for home projects. I have a small trailer. Carries everything I need and I could pull it with a small size sedan, in my case, a RAV4.
I realize this is off topic since you are towing a heavy travel trailer and looking to go larger. Another question is, why are you pulling such a large travel trailer. At some point, these monster trailers are just impractical.
I realize this is off topic since you are towing a heavy travel trailer and looking to go larger. Another question is, why are you pulling such a large travel trailer. At some point, these monster trailers are just impractical.
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Another way to look at this is to analyze how much debt you are carrying and your age. You claim you have $2700 a month extra each month. Is that really accurate? Because that is huge, thats about $30 k a year. Not many people in the US are in that situation. If so, I cannot understand what her fears are.
You put your dogs under a bed cover?
A cap. A bed cap. As in a Leer, ARE, Jericho
Got it. Amazing how costy those can get.
Glad you found something.
We are both in mid 30s. We have a line of credit we pay for on the house, as well as the mortgage. And a very small camper payment. Other than that it is revolving expenses that will never go away. I agree it is huge. And yes, with no car payment for me we have 2700$ a month left over after all expenses. Zero credit card debt and no car payments (other than new vehicle). Together we net close to 8000$/month.
The basis for her fear is that if god forbid we had to send the kids to daycare we would be too tight for her comfort. My issue is, with my work schedule, it won’t happen. I don’t see any way it can and it’s just a fear she simply cannot get past. She also threw out that she might want a different vehicle because she has trouble fitting the double stroller in her trunk
I found a 2017 with twice the mileage I initially wanted. I really wanted the aluminum bodied truck to avoid any more body rot. That has killed all my ford trucks in the past.
As far as the trailer goes, having 2 adults, 2 kids, and 2 dogs in a small trailer is chaotic. Some breathing room is necessary.
As far as work goes, they do not require me to have a truck. But I do need to get to work when needed reguadless of weather conditions, whether that be 3 feet of snow or flooding rains. I tow utility trailers around for myself and family members locally as well 16-20 foot flat bed trailers for tractors, UTVs etc
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Your clarification helps quite a bit. I wonder if there are other possible scenrios. While the RV's you mention clearly would be heavy enough to warrant a diesel, what range of weights are involved in your other towing needs/trailers? If they are lighter, might a light duty pickup or an SUV with good tow ratings help in the rest of your towing needs ( not counting the RV/s) ? I don't assume to have answers but maybe questions to consider.
I guess what I'm imagining is
1. Renting a tow vehicle for the RVs
2. Light Duty pickup for other towing needs (Ford's got some serious torque gassers now)
3. SUV's with good tow ratings can be an alternative choice IF you had a lightweight cargo trailer.( Or, would you find cargo trailers inconvenient?)
Ford just took the Explorer back to RWD in the new redesign
4. Does her awareness of your skills as a Diesel mechanic influence her thinking that you could fix anything that might break on an older option?
5. I recently asked a friend who is pondering purchasing an RV if she had considered renting one on site or staying in an RV a la AirBnB. Told her she would not have to worry about towing ratings and of course, the towing itself. Driving without towing is at least more convenient?
6. I have not compared gas vs. diesel with tow capable vehicles, but would the price difference there help in getting to her payment goals?
I guess what I'm imagining is
1. Renting a tow vehicle for the RVs
2. Light Duty pickup for other towing needs (Ford's got some serious torque gassers now)
3. SUV's with good tow ratings can be an alternative choice IF you had a lightweight cargo trailer.( Or, would you find cargo trailers inconvenient?)
Ford just took the Explorer back to RWD in the new redesign
4. Does her awareness of your skills as a Diesel mechanic influence her thinking that you could fix anything that might break on an older option?
5. I recently asked a friend who is pondering purchasing an RV if she had considered renting one on site or staying in an RV a la AirBnB. Told her she would not have to worry about towing ratings and of course, the towing itself. Driving without towing is at least more convenient?
6. I have not compared gas vs. diesel with tow capable vehicles, but would the price difference there help in getting to her payment goals?
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I can understand the draw to the aluminum bodies. I admire Ford's gutsy move taking their trucks to aluminum bodies. If you end up getting to go that route, do they offer oil spraying in RI? Up here in Ontario, it's quite common to spray underneath even for the aluminum bodied Fords since the frame/chassis will still rust like crazy here. They lay salt down here like crazy. If anyone up here doesn't get their car oil sprayed, they have about 5 years before the rot sets in. Yeah, salt is just evil!!
