Pharmaceutical Namer

[MolaKule]

In my next life I want to be the Chemist who give names to Pharmaceuticals and do the Marketing:

1. MercyViberzi - Makes you a running athlete as it scours your bowels,

2. SpaSma - Calms you down before you become a spaz,

3. Nozium - Cures acid reflux while making you nauseous

4. Hestor - Reduces cholesterol while making you think you're a Greek God,

5. KillRCure - as the name implies. If you don't die, you sure wish you had,

6. SPiralOutaControl - An inhaler for those times when you're getting outa control,

7. Riagra - For those moments when you and your honey are sitting in separate bathtubs,

8. NasoBleed - when you want to clear your sinuses and bleed at the same time,

9. Vilify - a drug that will allow you to blame anyone-anytme,

10. Annanol - when you want to become anonymous on any website,

11. Harmoni - when you want to become part of a quartet but it just doesn't work out,

12. OhmyPraZile - for those times when you want to burp in public but can't,

13. MotorProlol - when your engine doesn't start and the kids are in the car; keeps you from saying "bad words,"

14. PregnantZone - what you take when your wife smiles and says the strip has turned a certain color,

15. AttentionAll - what you take before the big staff meeting,

16. Fluoxytine - don't get this near a fire or open flame,

17. MoxyClavin - when you need to regain your moxy,

18. TammmySolin, she's cute but knows Martial Arts,

19. ZoldtotheHihestBidder - what you take before an auction

20. BITOGohlaZine - what you take before you log in to BITOG.

 

[ls1mike]

Nice!

 

[Kuato]

Good one!!

You forgot DAMITOL...for those moms that have had enough.

 

[AZjeff]

So you're the guy who comes up with those stupid names on all the TV drug ads. They probably spend millions and you just made that list in 20 minutes!

 

[beanoil]

I only need one pill.
The heavy duty version of dangitall.
Starts with an Eff.

I do think most crabby people on diets could use a Steak-Alm or two.

 

[OneEyeJack]

I've often wondered if there is a service that will for a fee supply you with a name for your next drug. It appears that they are having more and more difficulty coming up with names.

I'd be willing to bet that people inside the drug industry have internal names for their next new drug that would not be politically or socially acceptable to the outside world.

I can imagine the conversations that go on while developing and testing a new drug. Imagine the chemist with what became Viagra. It was supposed to be a heart drug. I can hear the board room conversation now. Well it's not doing anything for the heart but boy, these patients are developing wood like you won't believe. Response? To heck with the heart, we now have a better product. Developing good hard wood will make a lot more money than one more heart drug. Call in the marketing and lets get ready to have a party.

 

[MolaKule]

Originally Posted By: OneEyeJack


...I can imagine the conversations that go on while developing and testing a new drug. Imagine the chemist with what became Viagra. It was supposed to be a heart drug. I can hear the board room conversation now. Well it's not doing anything for the heart but boy, these patients are developing wood like you won't believe. Response? To heck with the heart, we now have a better product. Developing good hard wood will make a lot more money than one more heart drug. Call in the marketing and lets get ready to have a party.

 

[Sam_Julier]

Originally Posted By: OneEyeJack
I've often wondered if there is a service that will for a fee supply you with a name for your next drug. It appears that they are having more and more difficulty coming up with names.

I'd be willing to bet that people inside the drug industry have internal names for their next new drug that would not be politically or socially acceptable to the outside world.

I can imagine the conversations that go on while developing and testing a new drug. Imagine the chemist with what became Viagra. It was supposed to be a heart drug. I can hear the board room conversation now. Well it's not doing anything for the heart but boy, these patients are developing wood like you won't believe. Response? To heck with the heart, we now have a better product. Developing good hard wood will make a lot more money than one more heart drug. Call in the marketing and lets get ready to have a party.


Years ago my wife and I were at one of my daughters many school suppers and sat at the table with the lead Pfizer research MD PhD who ran the clinical trials on what became Sildenafil Citrate. His description of the "ah-ha" moment left most of us laughing so hard were couldn't eat. Basically it goes like this: The test participants kept rolling over from their backs making it difficult to get accurate readings from the heart monitoring leads. There was a long row of participants. The nurses and Docs were spending alot of time keeping every one still and on their backs. Finally one dude motions to the lead Doc and whispers to him that he has "the most intense erection in his life." The Doc surveyed the men and noticed "alot of tee-pees" as he called it. "That's when I knew we were onto something BIG he said." Hilarious. I'll never forget that dinner as long as l live.

Sam

 

[pandus13]

Originally Posted By: beanoil
I only need one pill.
The heavy duty version of dangitall.

Nope, that is the pill to use to find a certain disappearing tool.... after it went airborne

 

[MolaKule]

Speaking of new drugs:

The FDA has just released a new drug for those easily offended, can't take a joke, or understand sarcasm:


It is called, "GrowacetTM (Testicular Fortitude Capsules)."

 

[4WD]

In Houston - some of the 2500/3500 trucks even grow them