I'd do every 2 years or so. 3 years isn't the kiss of death--witness the vast number of 10+ year old cars motoring happily along with 10+ year old fluid.
I bought a Mityvac, and I like it. Vacuum out the master cylinder, refill, then do each wheel. IMO I'm not sure that order matters if you do something like once/year--seems like the worst fluid is at the wheel cylinders. Only downside to the Mityvac is all the air bubbles in the line while it's doing its job--but it's less risky than using an untrained helper.
*
I'm not clear yet on the impact of ABS. I'd think fluid would circulate through just fine without cycling the pump, 'cept whatever is in the ABS unit may stay there. Which I'm not sure is all that much to worry about. It's well sealed, and lightly used, so I'd think its fluid is not massively degraded.
I did the Mityvac thing on my fleet this fall. Jetta and Camry seemed to go ok, but my Tundra seemed to not like it. Slow flow and the pedal did not firm up quite like it did in the others.
*
I might buy some of those speed bleeders. The original bleeders on my vehicles aren't going to stay looking nice forever.