In business you can't win them all. When everyone wants a money losing deal and the business have to honor it, they would go out of business. They have to come up with some way to make a profit to stay afloat, and it is just the way it is. The problem really is more of a monopoly nature of a grid, whether they are the one who sell us the electricity or buy from us.
I do think if you have micro-inverters you can gradually add more panels as you go. Whether it makes economic sense is another matter (I don't think it does). The cost of residential / roof top system are usually heavily labor intensive, and the fewer times you have to get on the roof and deal with sales and quotes, the better off you are.
About new home owners weren't getting as good a deal as before. The older ones took a lot of risk installing roof top solar when they were still new and more expensive, and things could have gone very wrong very fast, so the incentives were to make them a better deal. This wasn't something that should have gone this popular to the point of causing duck curves when they design it, and they never anticipate it to cause this much problem to the grid. I don't blame the utility for demanding battery storage for solar, and I don't blame them wanting to add emergency clause in there.
You can't run a business like that. Sometimes, you have to pay for someone else to carry the bag. If you can't triple your system size just in case and waste a lot of generation, you have to pay and let someone else do the work. Business pay others for excess capacity or supply all the time, they don't make as much as if they make everything themselves, but they don't get into problems of surplus and run into cash flow problem either, they can just let the supply deal with it. This is really more of a trade off between fix vs variable cost. I don't see buying some from PG&E leaving money on the table, I see it as letting them deal with a problem too big for myself to solve.