I just spent a couple of hours driving to a half-dozen AutoZone stores around my town, and cleaning up on $2/qt synthetic oils (M-1, Castrol Edge, P-P, and MaxLife Full Syn) in various useful viscosities. The stash is still in the back seat of my car, uncounted, but I think I spent less than $100 for the 40 or so quarts. My wife may want to know if there's help available for me, or if there's a support group for affected relatives . . .