If Bitog made a car commercial

[skyactiv]

Introducing the Unicorn 2000. It comes equipped with a conventional 4 speed automatic, your choice of a naturally aspirated 4 or 6 cylinder engine with multiport fuel injection, timing chain(s),
a long Fram Ultra oil filter, 5 quarts of 0W40 Pennzoil Platinum and 15" General RT43 tires.

 

[addyguy]

Yup.

 

[Oildudeny]

I don't understand?

 

[cpayne5]

Originally Posted by skyactiv
Introducing the Unicorn 2000. It comes equipped with a conventional 4 speed automatic, your choice of a naturally aspirated 4 or 6 cylinder engine with multiport fuel injection, timing chain(s),
a long Fram Ultra oil filter, 5 quarts of 0W40 Pennzoil Platinum and 15" General RT43 tires.


And if you don't like it, you're an idiot. Obviously.

 

[Leo99]

I thought it'd be a panther with V8 and rwd.

 

[supton]

Originally Posted by skyactiv
Introducing the Unicorn 2000. It comes equipped with a conventional 4 speed automatic, your choice of a naturally aspirated 4 or 6 cylinder engine with multiport fuel injection, timing chain(s),
a long Fram Ultra oil filter, 5 quarts of 0W40 Pennzoil Platinum and 15" General RT43 tires.


Meh, all wrong:
-manual transmission. Without those unproven fancy-smancy synchros that haven't been around all that long
-it's a timing chain, but being only a foot long it's unlikely to ever give problems. Better yet, it's a gear.
-15" tires? c'mon, those are expensive. Bring back 13's
-although the engine is incapable of shearing oil, the specification table would look like 5W30 for brutal cold areas (like freezing and below) while recommending 15W40 is for everything else. Except any place hot. There 20W50 is required.
-crank windows, no a/c, yadda yadda yadda. Rubber floor mat is an option (bare floor is standard).
-It's somehow magically sold without ABS, TC, VSC yet is legal on the road.
-it's sold in two versions: one that is incapable of exceeding speed limit, ever. The other incapable of going under the limit, ever.

It'd also look like an ad from the 1950's.

 

[aquariuscsm]

Originally Posted by Leo99
I thought it'd be a panther with V8 and rwd.


It'd be the all new Ford LTD Crown Victoria with Mobil 1 as the factory fill

 

[Leo99]

Originally Posted by aquariuscsm
Originally Posted by Leo99
I thought it'd be a panther with V8 and rwd.


It'd be the all new Ford LTD Crown Victoria with Mobil 1 as the factory fill

Are we sold on fuel injection or should we go back to a carburetor?

 

[supton]

Originally Posted by Leo99
Originally Posted by aquariuscsm
Originally Posted by Leo99
I thought it'd be a panther with V8 and rwd.


It'd be the all new Ford LTD Crown Victoria with Mobil 1 as the factory fill

Are we sold on fuel injection or should we go back to a carburetor?


That one's tricky. Carb can easily be taken apart and put back together, while EFI has stuff we can't poke around with. OTOH we no longer have raw gas washing down cylinder walls leading to excessive cylinder wear. And it does seem as if PFI has proven itself over time.

I think port fuel injection might be worth the gamble, although we might want to wait a few more years before fully recommending its usage across the board. We should know in another decade, two at most.

 

[maxdustington]

It would be a panther or a GM W body with a 3.8 series II (updated intake gaskets).

 

[skyactiv]

I forget to add factory applied Krown fluid film.

 

[aquariuscsm]

Originally Posted by supton
Originally Posted by Leo99
Originally Posted by aquariuscsm
Originally Posted by Leo99
I thought it'd be a panther with V8 and rwd.


It'd be the all new Ford LTD Crown Victoria with Mobil 1 as the factory fill

Are we sold on fuel injection or should we go back to a carburetor?


That one's tricky. Carb can easily be taken apart and put back together, while EFI has stuff we can't poke around with. OTOH we no longer have raw gas washing down cylinder walls leading to excessive cylinder wear. And it does seem as if PFI has proven itself over time.

I think port fuel injection might be worth the gamble, although we might want to wait a few more years before fully recommending its usage across the board. We should know in another decade, two at most.


I say carburetor,hand crank windows,manual seats,am radio,and a HUGE "Mobil 1 0W16" badge on the oil fill cap because everyone here knows that thick as molasses 10W30 can't reach all the nooks and crannies in the engine that has tight clearances and tolerances

 

[maxdustington]

Advertises OEM of brake pads as Akebono, Aisin timing set, Bando belts, Bilstein shocks
Factory spin on filter mount on the trans (autos) and power steering
Trans pan with drain plug standard (optional Fumoto)
Trans and oil and rear end(!) temp gauges
Optional bypass filtration
Magnetic drain plugs
Coated brake rotors
Transmission FF is Maxlife

Oil change plan consists of x number of oil changes worth of whatever oil is cool at that moment on BITOG + a Rockauto closeout filter but they just give you the oil and filter.

 

[Lolvoguy]

Originally Posted by supton

That one's tricky. Carb can easily be taken apart and put back together, while EFI has stuff we can't poke around with. OTOH we no longer have raw gas washing down cylinder walls leading to excessive cylinder wear. And it does seem as if PFI has proven itself over time.

I think port fuel injection might be worth the gamble, although we might want to wait a few more years before fully recommending its usage across the board. We should know in another decade, two at most.

 

[beanoil]

Only one thing to say here..

 

[eljefino]

 

[Number_35]

Originally Posted by supton
Originally Posted by skyactiv
Introducing the Unicorn 2000. It comes equipped with a conventional 4 speed automatic, your choice of a naturally aspirated 4 or 6 cylinder engine with multiport fuel injection, timing chain(s),
a long Fram Ultra oil filter, 5 quarts of 0W40 Pennzoil Platinum and 15" General RT43 tires.


Meh, all wrong:
-manual transmission. Without those unproven fancy-smancy synchros that haven't been around all that long
-it's a timing chain, but being only a foot long it's unlikely to ever give problems. Better yet, it's a gear.
-15" tires? c'mon, those are expensive. Bring back 13's
-although the engine is incapable of shearing oil, the specification table would look like 5W30 for brutal cold areas (like freezing and below) while recommending 15W40 is for everything else. Except any place hot. There 20W50 is required.
-crank windows, no a/c, yadda yadda yadda. Rubber floor mat is an option (bare floor is standard).
-It's somehow magically sold without ABS, TC, VSC yet is legal on the road.
-it's sold in two versions: one that is incapable of exceeding speed limit, ever. The other incapable of going under the limit, ever.

It'd also look like an ad from the 1950's.

Almost there ... I also want the GM breaker points from the V8s, where you can pop up the window on the cap and set the dwell while the car's running.

If it's pushrod I'm good with gears or a short timing chain, but if it's OHC I want a timing belt.

Someone must have mentioned that it's got to be RWD with a north-south engine, right?

 

[spk2000]

"any color so long as it is black"

 

[StevieC]

It has 2 oil sumps, one for 0w20 that it automatically switches to when the engine is cold and the other full of straight 30 weight it switches to when it's warm. There is also a button for on the fly TAN/TBN testing.

 

[eljefino]

^ You joke but I wish they made a car with a 1 gal reserve tank you could put premium in that it could tap automatically for when you really got on it.