Got any funny one-liners?

[wavinwayne]

I'll start.

A skeleton walks into a bar and says "Give me a drink and a mop."

...I'll see myself out.

 

[levi]

I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know

 

[Boomer]

A guy walks into a bar. Boy, did his head hurt!

 

[FartSquirrel]

Yes Dear....

 

[Opelman]

Have you heard the one about the fence?
No?
You'll get over it.

 

[Snagglefoot]

A Roman solder walks into a bar and orders a martinus. The bartender says, don’t you mean a martini? The soldier says, if I wanted a double I would tell you.

 

[SammyChevelleTypeS3]

1 _________________________

 

[dubber09]

Karma La.

 

[Number_35]

A termite walks into a pub and asks "Where is the bar tender?".