1 . Only in America......can a pizza get to
your house faster than an ambulance
>2. Only in America.....are there
handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.
>3. Only in America.....do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
>4. Only in America......do people order
double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.
>5. Only in America......do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.
>6. Only in America......do we leave cars
worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the
garage.
>7. Only in America.......do we use
answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a
call from someone we didn't want
to talk to in the first place.
>8. Only in America.......do we buy hot
dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
>9. Only in America......do we use the
word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
>10. Only in America.......do they have
drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering..
EVER WONDER
>Why the sun lightens our hair, but
darkens our skin?
>Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
>Why don't you ever see the headline !
"Psychic Wins Lottery"?
>Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
>Why is it that doctors call what they do
"practice"?
>Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you
have to click on "Start"?
>Why is lemon juice made with artificial
flavor, and dish washing liquid made
with real lemons?
>Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
>Why is the time of day with the slowest
traffic called rush hour?
>Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
>When dog food is new and improved
tasting, who tests it?
>Why didn't Noah swat those two
mosquitoes?
>Why do they sterilize the needle for
lethal injections?
>You know that indestructible black box
that is used on airplanes? Why don't
they make the whole plane out of that
stuff?
>Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
>Why are they called apartments when
they are all stuck together?
>If con is the opposite of pro, is
Congress the opposite of progress?
>If flying is so safe, why do they call
the airport the terminal?
your house faster than an ambulance
>2. Only in America.....are there
handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.
>3. Only in America.....do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
>4. Only in America......do people order
double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.
>5. Only in America......do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.
>6. Only in America......do we leave cars
worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the
garage.
>7. Only in America.......do we use
answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a
call from someone we didn't want
to talk to in the first place.
>8. Only in America.......do we buy hot
dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
>9. Only in America......do we use the
word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
>10. Only in America.......do they have
drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering..
EVER WONDER
>Why the sun lightens our hair, but
darkens our skin?
>Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
>Why don't you ever see the headline !
"Psychic Wins Lottery"?
>Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
>Why is it that doctors call what they do
"practice"?
>Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you
have to click on "Start"?
>Why is lemon juice made with artificial
flavor, and dish washing liquid made
with real lemons?
>Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
>Why is the time of day with the slowest
traffic called rush hour?
>Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
>When dog food is new and improved
tasting, who tests it?
>Why didn't Noah swat those two
mosquitoes?
>Why do they sterilize the needle for
lethal injections?
>You know that indestructible black box
that is used on airplanes? Why don't
they make the whole plane out of that
stuff?
>Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
>Why are they called apartments when
they are all stuck together?
>If con is the opposite of pro, is
Congress the opposite of progress?
>If flying is so safe, why do they call
the airport the terminal?
