Wife 1.0 (for win98, winME, win2000 & winXP)

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Aug 13, 2002
Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity.

Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, Racing 3.6, and Pubbing 6.0 can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!


A Troubled User.


Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that our male users complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING. It is impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is also impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0.

WARNING! DO NOT, under any circumstance, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the computer.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

[This E-mail was scanned for viruses]
I love it!

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0. and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?


Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: "http: I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background, that will eventually seize control of all your system resources). Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support
Moving from Wife 1.0 to Wife 2.0 is an expensive upgrade due to mandatory de-install charges for Wife 1.0.

Too bad it is not practical to just reformat your hard drive and start over. I am sure many would do that if it were possible.

Originally posted by k1xv:
Too bad it is not practical to just reformat your hard drive and start over. I am sure many would do that if it were possible.

I am getting ready to upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0

Currently the only problems I am running into is with an applcation called Wedding 9.0. This Wedding 9.0 is a royal PITA and is costing me mega $$$ to maintain. I realize that the programers of Girlfriend 7.0 usually cover the cost of these problems with Wedding 9.0, but they have gone out of business, leaving me with the bill. On top of having these problems with Wedding 9.0, I am also having a problem with upgrading Apartment.exe to House 1.01. I am really looking forward to installing Wife 1.0, but I need to fix Wedding 9.0 and Apartment.exe before I can install Wife 1.0

Please help as I am begining to go insane
Hmmm. Wife 1.0 should be able to reside in harmony with Apartment.exe OR House 1.01. If Wife 1.0 requires House 1.01 as a prerequisite and Apartment.exe will not work with her, you may want to take back Wife 1.0 for a full refund. (Make sure you have the receipt, disks, and original packaging!
I am not willing to return Wife 1.0 because it is the best operating system I have ever bought. I have already confirmed that it will run with other programs which I enjoy such as Pubbing 6.0, Poker Night 10.3 etc..., however I will not be able to use these programs as often because Wife 1.0 will take up some of the available memory. I think this is a decent trade for an improved OS.

The problem is that Apartment.exe only has room for one OS and the version of Wife 1.0 that I purchased (actually fiancee 1.5 which is easly upgraded to Wife 1.0) came with a bonus OS called Daughter 1.0

Unlike many big city stores, my local store has an abundance of House 1.01 available for rent at decent prices. My problem is that I am too picky and am looking for the very best version of House 1.01 which isn't as readily available.

[ April 27, 2005, 09:43 PM: Message edited by: medic ]
Ahh, I see! The motherboard may be of standard size, but it you need the additional room in your case to allow room for the daughterboard. Looks like you need the "midtower" model which offers room for further expansion.
What ever you do, NEVER install any shareware version of Girlfriend, especial ver. 1.0!! It is loaded with viruses and other junk.

I did enjoy the purchase of Girlfriend 19.9 except it shut everything down unless I kept paying.

Originally posted by 1 FMF:
there is a hack by this author, called woodchipper, that will uninstall any vresion of the wife OS I believe:

As larry the cable guy would say, Lord I apologize for that one.

If you ever used that program, it would result in massive fragmentation of the hard drive. If anyone found out about it, all your operating licenses would be revoked.
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