Everyone has been in it least once, and I think I'm in it now.
I worked for my dad for the past few years, a construction job, working 6 days a week, but I've only received 1 paycheck, but slowly, he forgets his wallets here and there and borrows money and never pays me back, now I'm out and he expects room & board weekly from me. And he does make quite a bit a cash. His health is declining too, and he seems to have anger problems, one minute he is a nightmare, the next minute he is fine.
There have been a lot of family problems too, my aunt is homeless, and has a drug problem. Her 16 year old son lives in the car with her. She beats him too, once in font of me when she was delusional. You can call the police as often as you want, they just let her go, or drop her off at our house. She follows me sometimes, and keyed my car because it is parked outside. My sister has 3 kids, the state thankfully took them away because of her absence of parenting. The state told her if she fixes the house problem, she could get them back. So she calls me asking for $100 here and there to have the rodent infestation problem taken care of. I always hang up. I've imagined myself to be a neat uncle, sending neat things for Christmas, but they are gone with another family. My brother has died. It was a long time ago, and no one will tell me why or how. All I know is where his grave is. My mom divorced and was remarried months later, a few states away. I try to see her once a year.
My dad's has dating problems too, he goes to homeless shelters to give a helping hand, and finds woman to bring home. It doesn't matter if I am home, they are loud so to speak. Some of them have stolen money and medicine from drawers. My dad in return has bought personal door locks for our bedrooms (another sister lives at home.) Sometimes he drives hours to find woman, and other times they are dropped off by people we don't know. Due to something that had happened today he may be kicking me out. I warned my sister of another woman he brought home, she texted my dad and I could here both of them downstairs, he sounded a bit angry.
We don't get along much anymore, He doesn't even like it when I bring my car into the garage for maintenance. And then things turn dark in an instant, He makes death threats when I hand him something and its dropped, like a screw or tool. Sometimes in my most declined of moments, he urges me to kill myself. I wish he would make the call in my self harming episodes. I don't have any money to bring myself in, and I don't have insurance.
I have an appointment tomorrow at a temp agency for a new job. I may live in my car for a bit if it ever came to another fight, but it is hard to think to start from nothing and try to get a apartment, maintain my car, then try to go back to school and restart life. He reminds me this
"My dad did it to me, and now your going to get the same treatment."
But then maybe I should have taken more careful consideration of my dad's words, I should have killed myself a long time ago. I'm sorry if this was a bit dark, but someone here must have been in the deepest of voids and got themselves out.
I worked for my dad for the past few years, a construction job, working 6 days a week, but I've only received 1 paycheck, but slowly, he forgets his wallets here and there and borrows money and never pays me back, now I'm out and he expects room & board weekly from me. And he does make quite a bit a cash. His health is declining too, and he seems to have anger problems, one minute he is a nightmare, the next minute he is fine.
There have been a lot of family problems too, my aunt is homeless, and has a drug problem. Her 16 year old son lives in the car with her. She beats him too, once in font of me when she was delusional. You can call the police as often as you want, they just let her go, or drop her off at our house. She follows me sometimes, and keyed my car because it is parked outside. My sister has 3 kids, the state thankfully took them away because of her absence of parenting. The state told her if she fixes the house problem, she could get them back. So she calls me asking for $100 here and there to have the rodent infestation problem taken care of. I always hang up. I've imagined myself to be a neat uncle, sending neat things for Christmas, but they are gone with another family. My brother has died. It was a long time ago, and no one will tell me why or how. All I know is where his grave is. My mom divorced and was remarried months later, a few states away. I try to see her once a year.
My dad's has dating problems too, he goes to homeless shelters to give a helping hand, and finds woman to bring home. It doesn't matter if I am home, they are loud so to speak. Some of them have stolen money and medicine from drawers. My dad in return has bought personal door locks for our bedrooms (another sister lives at home.) Sometimes he drives hours to find woman, and other times they are dropped off by people we don't know. Due to something that had happened today he may be kicking me out. I warned my sister of another woman he brought home, she texted my dad and I could here both of them downstairs, he sounded a bit angry.
We don't get along much anymore, He doesn't even like it when I bring my car into the garage for maintenance. And then things turn dark in an instant, He makes death threats when I hand him something and its dropped, like a screw or tool. Sometimes in my most declined of moments, he urges me to kill myself. I wish he would make the call in my self harming episodes. I don't have any money to bring myself in, and I don't have insurance.
I have an appointment tomorrow at a temp agency for a new job. I may live in my car for a bit if it ever came to another fight, but it is hard to think to start from nothing and try to get a apartment, maintain my car, then try to go back to school and restart life. He reminds me this
"My dad did it to me, and now your going to get the same treatment."
But then maybe I should have taken more careful consideration of my dad's words, I should have killed myself a long time ago. I'm sorry if this was a bit dark, but someone here must have been in the deepest of voids and got themselves out.
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