What is really important

[Barkleymut]

I lost a friend today. Not a close friend, heck I have not seen her in over 20 years. But man, she sure was a special person. She was the kind of person that would light up any room and make 20 people laugh. She was a great sister and friend.

Over this past weekend she decided to take her own life. Like I said, I have not seen her in many many years. It seems she had become very depressed and while family thought she would pull out of it, she did not.

If you know anyone that has problems, take time out and talk to them. Even if you just bumped into them at the store. Find out what is going on in their life and tell them how much you like them. Don't sound creepy, but tell them you think they are a great person. I have 2 people in my immediate family that have battled serious mental problems and it is no joke, these people need your help. I can proudly say that I have helped both of them, helped them when no one else wanted to because they saw them as losers, or a lost cause. Both of them are great people, they just needed some darn attention and to know that they are loved.

I will miss ya D.

 

[Rolla07]

Well said. My condolences.

 

[morepwr]

I am sorry for your loss. I had one of best friends brother take himself out and the impact that has on the family is horrible. I have seen people go threw a depressed period and your right in saying all it sometimes takes is showing you care. We all hit rough patches in life and some cant deal with it as well as others and can really use a friend to help them threw it.

 

[daves87rs]

So sorry to hear. Caring is so important....the help it offers is huge...

 

[Shannow]

Have seen it in friends and family...and coincidentally, today downunder is RUOK day.

https://www.ruokday.com/

I don't know whether it's more discussible these days, or there's more of it, but last 12 months, I've been exposed to people threatening it, unknowingly helped out someone who was days away from doing it

 

[crinkles]

Sorry for your loss.

Have been close myself in the past, and also my wife recently.

I go in cycles, and mercifully they are becoming more widely spaced and less intense. Maybe its just aging.

 

[Falken]

I think today in life there is a lot of pressure on people.

And everyone's life is for all to see in today's modern world.

I was browsing for a completely unrelated video, and noticed in the recommended links a special on Suicide Mountain in Japan...

When you have massive social and class issues, and high expectation and high unemployment, it pushes people to take their own life.

Over in Japan, this is seen as an easy way out.

Was such a sad video to see all the people that go there to hang themselves in the woods. Bones in Timberland boots with Toyota car keys resting by the victim.

Modern life, I believe, is partly to blame. A human can only take so much change in one generation.

All the people committing suicide from Facebook bullying, these are 17 year old kids.

Then you have nuts pushing for us to go to war in Syria when a lot of people just want a job.

Society needs to take a massive step back.

I am very sorry for your friend, it is really sad how final it is.

 

[Donald]

People should not be afraid to seek help, and or take medicine to stabilize their mood.

 

[supton]

Sad to hear that.

Whenever those thoughts pile up on me, and won't go away, I mull over the impact it'd have on others. That kills the desire before long. Whatever problems I might be having pales compared to the problems I'd hoist onto others.

 

[GreeCguy]

So sorry to hear of your loss, may God receive her with open and loving arms into heaven. You are so right as well, it's so easy to get caught up in our own routine and schedules that we forget or overlook the needs of others.

 

[doitmyself]

Barkleymut,

Thank you for sharing this very important reminder.

 

[Whitewolf]

Originally Posted By: supton
Whenever those thoughts pile up on me, and won't go away, I mull over the impact it'd have on others. That kills the desire before long. Whatever problems I might be having pales compared to the problems I'd hoist onto others.


That's the way I think too.

Still sad about the friend though and it's right that sometimes we fail to notice when someone is in that much distress.

 

[Barkleymut]

I went to the funeral yesterday, at least 300 people were there crying like little kids. Like I said in my OP she was an awesome loving friend to a lot of people. I really wish she would have reached out to someone, anyone of those 300 people would have hugged her and done anything they could to help. But having known others with bi-polar I understand that the lows can be unbearable and I guess that was where she was. She was on medication and was actually in the medical profession with a Very important job. She had to know that the medication was not working and she knew she had options other than suicide. But sometimes mental illness is that awful. Anyways, thanks for your kind words. This event has really inspired me to talk more to old friends that just don't seem right. It sure would be nice for someone going through tough times to receive an email text call or smile from someone that they have not heard from in a long time. Trust me, some of these people think that no one cares about them.

 

[JHZR2]

A guy at work just lost his daughter very recently as well inthe same timeframe. Was in VA - not sure if the same person, but so very sorry to hear of his and your loss. I cannot begin to imagine the sadness.

 

[andyd]

Ive gotten pretty close to it at times. I was a depressive held in check by self medication for most of my adult life. When they diagnosed me with breast cancer, I asked for an antidepressant. I have been taking Celexa for 4 yrs. I'm lucky, the meds work almost too well. I was even luckier that my 5 brother's and sisters gathered together and wished me well. Now, I dont dwell on negativity, I consider it a waste of time.Being told that I had cancer was a reality check. And a major dope slap. I wish it had happened 30 yrs ago. I was stressing out about day to day stuff that was meaningless compared to sharing life with my family and friends. Not any more. I beat the cancer. I am humbly grateful for that. Its the back side of the serenity prayer. Dont waste precious time moaning about mortality. Don't waste time wishing ill of things or people. Live your life and enjoy what you have. Gather your family to yourself and live while you can.

 

[yonyon]

Originally Posted By: Falken

Over in Japan, this is seen as an easy way out.


Maybe that's a good thing about their culture. Sometimes there are no better alternatives.

Barkleymut's friend suffering from depression most certainly would have been better served with medical treatment. Some other people are harmed just as much because we as a society shame them for considering a sensible solution to other problems and pressure them into extended suffering.

 

[Clevy]

Making a permanent decision based on temporary feelings never works out well.
Sorry for your loss

 

[JHZR2]

Originally Posted By: yonyon
Originally Posted By: Falken

Over in Japan, this is seen as an easy way out.


Maybe that's a good thing about their culture. Sometimes there are no better alternatives.

Barkleymut's friend suffering from depression most certainly would have been better served with medical treatment. Some other people are harmed just as much because we as a society shame them for considering a sensible solution to other problems and pressure them into extended suffering.


OP mentioned bipolar, which can be exceedingly difficult to deal with in terms of getting them on/staying on meds, etc.