What Constitutes a true BITOGer

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I have come up with a list. Others can add as they see fit.

To be a true BITOGER you must have at least TWO of the following.

1) specific tool - oil filter cutter
2) specific tool - UOA sample pump
3) more than 10 cases of oil in stash (motor or gear oil)
4) more than 2 grease guns for Zerk fittings

Extra credit if your wife knows you bought either #1 or #2 OR if #3 is kept in your bedroom.
What if we have all these things, is there some like higher grade BITOG nirvana status?
 
Buy a 10 year old beater with unknown maintenance, worn out suspension, barely passing emissions, but all you’re interested in is “what’s the best oil for it”.
Recommends 500, 1000, 2500 miles break in oil changes and 5K OCI’s on all new vehicles for maximum reliability. Buys only used cars from grannies with 10K OCI, all short trips, and no break in change.
 
By the time a true bitog’er gets a new car, it’s more than double the last one, and more than a year’s tuition at the most prestigious colleges in the USA. He/she doesn’t worry about it, but can’t stop wondering why the $1.39 any size fries 1x/day has disappeared from the McD’s mobile app
 
I dunno. I feel like I see lots of posts along the lines of:

-What oil should I tell my mechanic to use?
-I gathered all these good oil/filter/parts for my mechanic to put in this weekend. Is it the best?
-Amsoil recommendation = certification but my $22 LED headlight toys from Amazon certainly aren't blinding to oncoming drivers.
-Think that positive displacement oil pumps flow linearly with RPM and absolutely not as a function of backpressure.
-Nightmares of an oil filter bypass valve leaking/opening.
 
A real bitog’er wholeheartedly believes that the need for both HP and lbs ft, is directly proportional to age. He gets something in 2025 with 460, knowing this can’t possibly take him to retirement, as it won’t be enough, but is ok for now
 
You ask a salesperson for the rear axle ratio and want them to verify they didn’t somehow delete the mechanical limited slip and make it electronic
 
They believe that oil and additives can fix poor engineering and proceed to go down the Hoodoo Voodoo route by employing secret elixirs and flushes to amuse themselves with rather mystical results. 😁
When that fails they watch a Lake Speed video and share it here.
 
If you have watched a video of a oil change on a car your considering buying just to make sure it's a user friendly car to service and take this into consideration on the purchase decision.

Bonus points if you have then done research on what filter and oil you would use before even buying the car.
 
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