Schoolyard bullying - who's the bully ?

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When I was in third grade, I ended up cracking and broke the jaw of one of the bullies that had been bulling me for awhile. The school district tried to expel me, but one of the few times I ever saw my dad angry was when he threaten to sue the district if they even tried (This was in the 60s). They transferred me to another school.

When I was in middle school, I bumped into the guy that I broke his jaw. He tried to be friends but no way.

My son is 14 years old and a second degree black belt. When the kids in middle school tried to mess with him, we explained to the school that either they put a stop to it or we will back our child’s right to defend himself. They decided to push us, so I got hold of the school board and asked them if they could afford a lawsuit that they would end up losing. Things changed after that. My son has used what he’s learned twice in school and the kids stopped messing with him. One parent actually called us up and threaten to sue us because my son bloodied his son’s nose. I told him that he needs to contact the school and rethink about it doing that. I asked him if it was okay for his son to bully others, but not okay for the one being bullied to defend himself.

It also helps to have an aunt who is a very successful lawyer.

So when I saw the video, memories of what happened to me came to mind.
 
Originally Posted By: demarpaint
I asked him if he'd like his kids beaten up, or if they should defend themselves or take a beating because of school policy. His answer was he would have done exactly what I did, but rules are rules. LOL



AHHHHHH!!
mad.gif
 
Originally Posted By: ddrumman2004
One should never start a fight with someone bigger than them nor never corner anything meaner than you.

I don't agree with the suspension or suspension in general. If a child needs to be suspended, stick them in a classroom for offenders so they can still learn. Sending a child home does nothing. Now for the kid that started the fight...he needs to be suspended but not the "send home" suspension.

I'm sure I will have problems with my son who has Asperger's Disorder and will go into the 8th grade next year. He does not fight at all and there are plenty of "bullies" in his school.
Here's hoping that a couple of classmates that defend him now will do the same in high school.
If not, I'm liable to wind up incarcerated.


Middle school is a really tough time for any kid, not to mention coping with the challenges that would come along with Aspergers on top of it. My best wishes to you and your family. Here's to those classmates that have stuck up for him! It's nice to hear stuff like this, and I hope it continues.
 
Originally Posted By: tpitcher
Originally Posted By: demarpaint
I asked him if he'd like his kids beaten up, or if they should defend themselves or take a beating because of school policy. His answer was he would have done exactly what I did, but rules are rules. LOL



AHHHHHH!!
mad.gif




That's the truth, and it was another point in the discussion I had to signal my wife to CHILL!
 
Funny, I posted this same story and my thread was deleted within minutes.

So I'll say it again: the solution to bullying is to teach kids who are physically bullied to stand their ground and defend themselves with an amount of physical force required to stop the aggression. You can't negotiate or try and show overwhelming love or psychoanalyze and try and understand why certain people bully others. They're sociopaths.
 
Originally Posted By: robshelton
I'd say the kid used restraint. He could have really beaten that smaller kid! And you can be dog gone sure if I was his dad the school is going to have a really big fight from me for suspending him.


here here! That's exactly it. Casey showed so much restraint. Once he slammed the bully down, he walked away. He didn't escalate the situation any higher.
 
I almost got kicked out of middle school due to being bullied and snap.

I was always bullied when I was a kid and that day one kid try to lock me in a classroom by taking off the door knob, I tried for a while to get out and eventually snapped. I took the knob, throw at him from a few yards away, hit him in the face, and he fainted for a few minutes. He woke up in a pool of blood and started crying, ambulance came and took him to the hospital. We both got a major warning and if we ever did anything remotely similar again, we would be kicked out of school.

It is important for kid's psychological development to be able to defend him/herself. I agree with the policy of suspending both the trouble maker and the bullied, and repeated bully should be kicked out of school or arrested by police for good.

It is time to stop this "kids are just being kids" forgiveness. Kids grow up based on how they are taught and if they can get away with this, they'll try to get away with more.

What turns out if bullying is not stopped? The bullied either turns into a bully himself as a survival skill, or he becomes damaged later on in life. I later grow up to be a bully on surface, but I was damaged to some extend and have problem trusting anyone I am not familiar with.
 
My dad always taught me to stand up to bullies.

What he didn't teach me was that if a kid is a bully because he is abused by a parent, run like [heck].

That kid can take a punch from a grown man. Your little 4th grader punches aren't going to even register on his pain tolerance scale.

That was a tough lesson to learn. Don't know how I'm going to teach my kid that one. Hope he doesn't have to learn the way I did.
 
i was always a big kid,but quiet.usually reading in school.there were a few people who messed with me,but not often.i usually ignored them,once in a great while i'd have to put somebody on the ground.
i never started anything.i did finish things once or twice.
don't start any thing and there won't be anything.
bullies need to learn that.
 
Quote:
an overweight kid who'd been bullied for 4 years solid


Did the kid report the continuous bullying to the state run school, and what did said school with a "no touch" policy do to prevent this?
 
All of the people who bullied me in elementary school are either dead, in jail, single parents or a religious minister.
 
Our government is now monitoring Facebook and other social media sites to "prevent" bullying and provide "training or other interventions" to the families and the "larger school community".

Of course, the Department of Education is defining what amounts to bullying.
 
Originally Posted By: Drew99GT
Funny, I posted this same story and my thread was deleted within minutes.

So I'll say it again: the solution to bullying is to teach kids who are physically bullied to stand their ground and defend themselves with an amount of physical force required to stop the aggression. You can't negotiate or try and show overwhelming love or psychoanalyze and try and understand why certain people bully others. They're sociopaths.


I agree with this. I was lucky. I was an average to bigger than average guy with an average personality. Because of this, I was never singled out by a bully.

On the other hand, it is my observation that a bully doesn't want any hassle when bullying. He wants subservience and humiliation (from the person he is bullying). A person that stands up to the bullying is in my experience too much trouble and more conflict than the bully wants. Plus they don't feed the bully's needs. They want someone to cower, and they will go back to the person that cowers. The bully will be reluctant to go back to a person that defiant, resists/stands up to them, because they can always find someone that will cover, which feeds their sociopathic needs.

What is needed is for everyone to stand up to the bully and make it clear to them that they will be an outcast by being a bully and that their bullying will be stood up to in every instance. I will teach my kids to try to stand up to every bully, whether they are the one being bullied or not. Short term pain for long term gain. After all, a bully is in each instance performing a job interview to determine whether the victim will make a good repeat-doormat.

Easy to say, I know.
 
Originally Posted By: Tempest
Quote:
an overweight kid who'd been bullied for 4 years solid


Did the kid report the continuous bullying to the state run school, and what did said school with a "no touch" policy do to prevent this?


And private school has no bullies, right.
 
That video was disturbing but I'm glad the bully got what he deserved. Judging from the video, I think he broke his right ankle/shin/knee bones by slamming his foot into the ledge.
 
Seems like after the bully got slammed, another bully that's bigger is coming to revenge. It seems like it is a gang and if it is not because the girl stopped him, there might be another fight.

If I were the principle I'd expel both of the bullies.

Why is there a camera and why aren't the 2 girls early in the video calling for teachers?
 
Last edited:
Originally Posted By: PandaBear
Seems like after the bully got slammed, another bully that's bigger is coming to revenge. It seems like it is a gang and if it is not because the girl stopped him, there might be another fight.

...

Bigger bully stepped up but he didn't attack. He's scared of the overweight kid now. Classic bully.
 
Originally Posted By: Tempest
Quote:
an overweight kid who'd been bullied for 4 years solid


Did the kid report the continuous bullying to the state run school, and what did said school with a "no touch" policy do to prevent this?


From what I've read, this school has a recent history of a lot of fighting amongst kids. Seems to be that way in many schools these days. These PC no touch polices simply allow sociopath bullies to gang up and torment their victims.

Funny; when I was in school and victims of bullying defended themselves, they usually became more popular, the bullying stopped, and many times the bully and his/her victim became friends! And in the end, bullying wasn't that big of a problem because kids were able to work out their problems.

I do understand the no touch policies though. It has WAY more to do with lawsuits then it does about the problem of bullying.

Yawn. Just another sign of the decline of our society.
 
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