How about a friend's driveway, preferably out in the country a bit, or otherwise not so constrained by HOA rules?
A Firestone card works too, and Pennzoil & Quaker State seem to have rebate and / or discount coupons year round for having your oil changed somewhere using their products.
I agree what was done was very wrong. There's really no reason not to recycle automotive fluids like motor oil, transmission fluids, and gear oils and their associated filters these days.
Here, WM TLE accepts used motor oil, used motor oil filters, and used transmission filters for free to be recycled. They're the only shop accepting transmission filters for recycling in this area.
O'Reilly accepts used motor oil and used motor oil filters for free for recycling.
Autozone accepts used motor oil, transmission fluids, and gear oils free for recycling, but no filyters.
AAP only accepts used motor oil free for recycling here.
Plus, the county HHW Days in the warmer months of the year here accept all these materials plus used automotive coolant for recycling for free, one day a month.