Lost my mom yesterday.

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I lost my dad when i was 16 to cancer and my step-dad 2 years ago to hospital contracted infections.
It was really not easy to see both of them not be the big guys and just a shadow of themselfs.....

I suffer guilt both times (for not being able to do anything the first time, and finding out way too late the second time)

My wife lost her mom at 22 to cancer....

She raised a good son and she will always be a part of you. You will keep her alive by remembering her. But it is NOT your fault. You cannot control time.

But, We only live once, so I need you to go and hug your wife. She choose to be with you for the travel to the unknown end.

My sincere condolences
 
Originally Posted By: Chris142
She was 84. It started last wednesday. She wanted to get a hair cut. She called Uber for a ride as my wife and I were working that day.

She somehow contacted a stomach flue that led to dehydration. She came home on hospice. The hospital gave her fluids with a bag and we tried at home to get her to drink but it was too late I guess. The dehydration caused her heart to not pump correctly.

She died at home 3:24 yesterday afternoon.

I feel like it's my fault. If I had taken her to get a hair cut maybe she would still be here.
frown.gif


She was watching tv and feeding the cats a week ago.


What difference does it make - as to who took your mother for that haircut?
Also... Did the stomach flu symptoms arrive a few days after her haircut?

Sorry to hear that your mom passed and from reading your words, your involvement instead of Uber's, probably changes nothing. Sounds like her Life Clock was ending, regardless. Be thankful that her ending was quick and not a long, very expensive, drawn-out affair of prolonged suffering.
 
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Sorry for your loss. Its not your fault.

I Moved my Mother up here last year from FLA as she fell and broke her hip (2nd time). She contracted UTI in a nursing home and then fever. Lost her in Decemeber. I said to myself: $9500.00 a month for what kind of constant care and they didn't even notice a 103 fever?

For your mother, The bagged ringers L probably led to the cardiac arrest. I was cautioned about that by the head nurse at the nursing home. Congestive failure, water in the paracardium.

Hospital big mistake.

You have to let it go though. Its Not your fault.
 
So sorry Chris.
I have been taking care of my Mom for 4 months by myself.
Her insurance only gave her 28 days in a nursing home. She was forced out well before she was able.
I lost my father last year so I fully understand. lets face it- it's very tough to deal with. If you took her she would still get the flu. So you just have to let it go. no one is to blame. Be kind to yourself!
 
Sorry for your loss, and like everyone else has already stated, don't be hard on yourself. At 84, it is very easy for these things to happen since the immune system is not as strong. You can always look back and think "what if" but the reality is there is nothing you could've done, so do not blame yourself. I'm sure she had a wonderful life and is now watching over you.
 
Celebrate your mother's life. Her passing will sadden you. Eventually, you will stop thinking about your loss and life will become bearable again.
 
Losing a parent is so hard. I am very sorry for your loss Chris. It's not your fault at all, so try not to blame yourself. Praying for you and your family. --- Tony
 
So sorry to hear that your mom passed. My sympathy to you and your family.
My dad died 16 years ago so I know you WILL heal in time.

Do not blame yourself for her getting the flu though. You had nothing to do with it. She could have contracted that anywhere, maybe even before she left the house.

Be grateful you had her for such a long time and that she lived a full life. A lot of people don't make it that far. The last few years I've lost several people close to me at ages 52,53,64 and 19. So keep it in perspective Chris. Keep it in perspective.
 
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