Lost my mom yesterday.

[Chris142]

She was 84. It started last wednesday. She wanted to get a hair cut. She called Uber for a ride as my wife and I were working that day.

She somehow contacted a stomach flue that led to dehydration. She came home on hospice. The hospital gave her fluids with a bag and we tried at home to get her to drink but it was too late I guess. The dehydration caused her heart to not pump correctly.

She died at home 3:24 yesterday afternoon.

I feel like it's my fault. If I had taken her to get a hair cut maybe she would still be here.

She was watching tv and feeding the cats a week ago.

 

[The motor guy]

You can't blame yourself, how do those two things even correlate? I lost my mom 3 years ago at 57

 

[paulri]

Chris, I'm sorry for your loss.

Sounds like you had a very legit reason for not taking her. Easy for me to say but ya gotta let that one go. No point in second guessing yourself.

 

[THafeez]

I'm very sorry for your loss.

 

[zrxkawboy]

So sorry, Chris. Prayers to you.

 

[SZR48207]

Sorry Chris. You have my condolences.

 

[Rock_Hudstone]

Very sorry to hear about your mom. Not your fault at all and it sounds like she was healthy and active.

No consolation I know, but believe me there are far worse ways to go.

People get very fragile at that age at it doesn't take much sometimes.

 

[E150GT]

Im sorry. Don't blame yourself although I know that can be easy to do. My grandfather just passed away at 92. He was healthy as a horse other than dementia, and one day he just started declining. Took a week. Same for my grandmother. She went to the hospital for pneumonia and was scheduled to be released and that same day something happened and she just slipped into a coma and passed away. Talking and coherent one minute, dead the next. These things just happen and its nobodies fault.

 

[daves87rs]

So sorry Chris....sending prayers to you and the fam.

 

[WobblyElvis]

There are no words I can say to make you feel better and I know your pain. I too have watched a parent die. The pain will be with you the rest of your life. All I can say is it will lessen. The simple fact that you feel guilty is proof you were a good son. You have nothing to be ashamed of. The elderly don't want to be coddled. They want to live as you and I do, independently. This is why your mother went out, when she wanted to, and as she wanted to. This is the way it is, the circle of life.

 

[aquariuscsm]

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom

It was definitely not your fault. God called her home,he was ready for her. When it's our time,there's nothing that can change it. He calls all of us back home when He is ready for us,it's completely out of our hands. I lost my mom when I was 18. I still miss her every single day.

 

[barkingspider]

I'm so sorry for your lost. When the time comes for my parents, I don't know if I can handle the loss

 

[ls1mike]

Chris I am really sorry to hears this. Prayers for you and your family.

 

[Brybo86]

Hang in there Chris.

 

[L_Sludger]

My honest apologies to you Chris, I hope you can find peace during this difficult time.

 

[MONKEYMAN]

Sorry for your loss, prayers sent.

I lost my Mom 5 years ago when she was 79. She suffered for years before her death after she stopped producing enough blood. The Chemo led to shingles. Affib led to a stroke. She suffered immensely. You are fortunate your Mom did not need to suffer much.

RE: Guilt. At 16 I had a fender bender. Juvenile judge pulled my driver's license. My Dad flipped out. Two days later he killed himself. It took another 16 years to understand it was not anything I did. He was in the front lines of Korea in a Machine Gun Nest when he was 18. That was the beginning of the end. Don't be too hard on yourself. I hope you are grateful for the time you had with your Mom. I know I am.

 

[CarbonSteel]

Sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers with you and the family during this difficult time. You cannot second guess yourself and you must not feel guilty.

 

[Nyogtha]

Sorry for your loss Chris. Try not to blame yourself.

I lost my dad 31 years ago after performing CPR on him after he was taken into the ambulance. It's not easy to not feel some degree of responsibility at such times.

 

[bbhero]

It is not your fault at all Chris. Almost all older people do not drink enough water on a daily basis. This on combination with lack of appetite is a very common phenomenon of older people. This was in no way your fault at all.

My thoughts and prayers are with you during this very, very hard time.

 

[bbhero]

Holy cow that is very, very tough Nygotha. That is brutally tough. My friend had to do that for his wife. That is quite a very hard thing to go through. Bless your heart.