It doesn't sound like she has dementia; she was normal, had knee surgery, and all of a sudden she goes wacko. Sounds like she's high as a kite on opiate based pain killers or other prescription drugs.
Crazy arsche neighbor.
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Have some respect. If she was nice and acting like a normal old lady before the surgery, then it is probably the meds or whatever it was given to her that did this. It's not her fault. Yeah, dealing with this will not be easy, but remember that you might end up even worse at this age. Calling her names and such is definitely not the way to go, even if she does it. Treat her like a 5 year old.
Ignore her and explain to your young daughter that she is sick and acting this way because of it and that people of old age may do strange things, so that she understands the sudden change of behavior. Also advice her not to engage in any sort of conversation or confrontation this lady.
Ignore her and explain to your young daughter that she is sick and acting this way because of it and that people of old age may do strange things, so that she understands the sudden change of behavior. Also advice her not to engage in any sort of conversation or confrontation this lady.
Originally Posted By: KrisZ
Have some respect. If she was nice and acting like a normal old lady before the surgery, then it is probably the meds or whatever it was given to her that did this. It's not her fault. Yeah, dealing with this will not be easy, but remember that you might end up even worse at this age. Calling her names and such is definitely not the way to go, even if she does it. Treat her like a 5 year old.
Ignore her and explain to your young daughter that she is sick and acting this way because of it and that people of old age may do strange things, so that she understands the sudden change of behavior. Also advice her not to engage in any sort of conversation or confrontation this lady.
Agreed. If you have some sort of adult protective services office in your area, it may be worth a call to them and see if there is something they can do to assist.
Originally Posted By: aquariuscsm
That tard needs to be hauled away.
That's one of the most immature comments I think I've ever read here.
Have some respect. If she was nice and acting like a normal old lady before the surgery, then it is probably the meds or whatever it was given to her that did this. It's not her fault. Yeah, dealing with this will not be easy, but remember that you might end up even worse at this age. Calling her names and such is definitely not the way to go, even if she does it. Treat her like a 5 year old.
Ignore her and explain to your young daughter that she is sick and acting this way because of it and that people of old age may do strange things, so that she understands the sudden change of behavior. Also advice her not to engage in any sort of conversation or confrontation this lady.
Agreed. If you have some sort of adult protective services office in your area, it may be worth a call to them and see if there is something they can do to assist.
Originally Posted By: aquariuscsm
That tard needs to be hauled away.
That's one of the most immature comments I think I've ever read here.
The only documentation I have is the police report. Guess I'm going to have to start doing that. Kind of sucks....going outside to your yard and wondering what the wicked witch of the west is up to or where she's at. I'm going to just ignore her the best I can, but have my camcorder handy. The property that's is disputed by her is mine. Here in a couple of weeks when the weather decides to play nice, I'm going to re-fence my backyard up to my property line, maybe back off 6 inches so there is no dispute. I'll bet she'll try and tear it down or do something to it. I'll do it on a weekend when I'm off so that I can keep an eye on it. That will close the alley way. Question: If she puts her ornaments (it's actually some stupid looking ornate chairs) on my property, do I have the right to pick them up and THROW them back in her yard? I think I'm done playing nice. The wife isn't too happy about this situation. She does have a point: We have the right to live peaceful.
Call the OK equivalent of Health/Human Services and tell them you neighbor has been acting in a erratic and aggressive manner, that her family is unable to deal with/protect her, and that you believe she presents a danger to herself or others. Depending on how busy they are they might get the ball rolling on an involuntary hospitalization or similar.
Originally Posted By: Schmoe
The only documentation I have is the police report. Guess I'm going to have to start doing that. Kind of sucks....going outside to your yard and wondering what the wicked witch of the west is up to or where she's at. I'm going to just ignore her the best I can, but have my camcorder handy. The property that's is disputed by her is mine. Here in a couple of weeks when the weather decides to play nice, I'm going to re-fence my backyard up to my property line, maybe back off 6 inches so there is no dispute. I'll bet she'll try and tear it down or do something to it. I'll do it on a weekend when I'm off so that I can keep an eye on it. That will close the alley way. Question: If she puts her ornaments (it's actually some stupid looking ornate chairs) on my property, do I have the right to pick them up and THROW them back in her yard? I think I'm done playing nice. The wife isn't too happy about this situation. She does have a point: We have the right to live peaceful.
Videotape her putting the chairs on your property, then call the police. It's all you can safely do. Don't do anything stupid but build a solid case of evidence that she is violating your rights. I would also keep a journal with times, dates, and description of incidents to present to the police about her harassment. Eventually hopefully she will be charged and the authorities will be able to do a welfare check to see she's messed up on painkillers or other drugs.
Is she doing it to claim you stole them???
The only documentation I have is the police report. Guess I'm going to have to start doing that. Kind of sucks....going outside to your yard and wondering what the wicked witch of the west is up to or where she's at. I'm going to just ignore her the best I can, but have my camcorder handy. The property that's is disputed by her is mine. Here in a couple of weeks when the weather decides to play nice, I'm going to re-fence my backyard up to my property line, maybe back off 6 inches so there is no dispute. I'll bet she'll try and tear it down or do something to it. I'll do it on a weekend when I'm off so that I can keep an eye on it. That will close the alley way. Question: If she puts her ornaments (it's actually some stupid looking ornate chairs) on my property, do I have the right to pick them up and THROW them back in her yard? I think I'm done playing nice. The wife isn't too happy about this situation. She does have a point: We have the right to live peaceful.
Videotape her putting the chairs on your property, then call the police. It's all you can safely do. Don't do anything stupid but build a solid case of evidence that she is violating your rights. I would also keep a journal with times, dates, and description of incidents to present to the police about her harassment. Eventually hopefully she will be charged and the authorities will be able to do a welfare check to see she's messed up on painkillers or other drugs.
Is she doing it to claim you stole them???
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I'd consider the suggestion to call the local health department or social/human services, and document it. At the least, perhaps some record can be established outside of LEO. And, maybe they would have some suggestions.
Originally Posted By: Schmoe
All we have done is given and shown nothing but RESPECT to her. I don't call her names or anything, just within this forum as my trusted brethren that have offered me nothing but sound advice on all things in the past.
I doesn't matter how nice you have been, or how nice she used to be. For whatever reason, be it age related or prescription drug induced, she now has mental issues.
As already mentioned, call Social Services and get the ball rolling to get her some help.
All we have done is given and shown nothing but RESPECT to her. I don't call her names or anything, just within this forum as my trusted brethren that have offered me nothing but sound advice on all things in the past.
I doesn't matter how nice you have been, or how nice she used to be. For whatever reason, be it age related or prescription drug induced, she now has mental issues.
As already mentioned, call Social Services and get the ball rolling to get her some help.
Kestas
Staff member
Video documentation is good, but you can't always be ready for it. Keep a log. Written documentation has a lot of respect from authorities... dates, times, what happened. Don't underestimate written documentation. Once they see a lengthy history of incidents, they may take some action.
Regardless of the cause, this behavior is menacing. It's unfortunate that she's changed so much, and although you can speculate on the reasons why in an attempt to understand or sympathize with her current impairment, the point is, she's different as a result.
I'd first send her and her husband a nice letter describing her current behaviors and these incidents in a very observatory, matter of fact description...and your concerns, cc the police. Then, I'd document and video as much as I can. You might also need to get your attorney involved.
This is a very serious matter (above and beyond the inconvenience) as she can and most probably will either lash out or accuse you of doing so, and unfortunately, the police tend to believe little old ladys. You MUST protect yourself here with documentation and calls to the police before it gets much more out of hand.
Most police dept's don't want to make arrests on these calls, especially in neighbor disputes, but if laws are clearly violated AND there's an increase or exacerbation of tensions, AND a chance of violence, they will. Just make sure it isn't you.
I'd first send her and her husband a nice letter describing her current behaviors and these incidents in a very observatory, matter of fact description...and your concerns, cc the police. Then, I'd document and video as much as I can. You might also need to get your attorney involved.
This is a very serious matter (above and beyond the inconvenience) as she can and most probably will either lash out or accuse you of doing so, and unfortunately, the police tend to believe little old ladys. You MUST protect yourself here with documentation and calls to the police before it gets much more out of hand.
Most police dept's don't want to make arrests on these calls, especially in neighbor disputes, but if laws are clearly violated AND there's an increase or exacerbation of tensions, AND a chance of violence, they will. Just make sure it isn't you.
@Schmoe:
It sounds to me like her extended family will be of no help in solving the situation...I would call social services and explain the situation to them, make sure to have the police speak to them as well and hand them any copies of complaints you have. I would mention to the social service folks that the neighbor had recent surgery and that is when it appeared she became problematic and her personality changed greatly.
They are probably going to do a medical / psychological evaluation and if she is found to be mentally incompetent they might commit her, since the husband clearly cannot control her either.
It sounds to me like her extended family will be of no help in solving the situation...I would call social services and explain the situation to them, make sure to have the police speak to them as well and hand them any copies of complaints you have. I would mention to the social service folks that the neighbor had recent surgery and that is when it appeared she became problematic and her personality changed greatly.
They are probably going to do a medical / psychological evaluation and if she is found to be mentally incompetent they might commit her, since the husband clearly cannot control her either.
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Talk to her adult children.
reddit has a free legal advice section. I would be extremely cautious taking any advice that wasnt from a lawyer. https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
This is why I plan to off myself on my 60th birthday.
I really hope this is not your plan! please confirm you are just kidding
This is why I plan to off myself on my 60th birthday.
I really hope this is not your plan! please confirm you are just kidding
Install your own video cameras so just in case you have to protect yourself and she happens to get a severe case of lead poisining you have a silent witness which could prove self defence. I am lucky we have very nice neighbors that know better..lol
Originally Posted By: crazyoildude
Install your own video cameras so just in case you have a silent witness. I am lucky we have very nice neighbors that know better..lol
This. Just keep the area where the incidents usually occur under surveillance. Then you have a visual record.
Install your own video cameras so just in case you have a silent witness. I am lucky we have very nice neighbors that know better..lol
This. Just keep the area where the incidents usually occur under surveillance. Then you have a visual record.
I feel for you, Schmoe. The lady may have had a minor stroke and that is what happens. Or has been said, a conflict in her meds. My sibs and I went through this with my 95 yr old mother. Two of her meds were clashing, giving her hallucinations. My BIL, wife's brother had a minor stroke and it just makes him more irascible. This is on top of, several minor head injuries and bad genes. Is there a Council on Aging ?Social Services, Ladies Auxiliary or health agency? HOA?
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