Considering a radical change...
- Thread starter Jarlaxle
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Too much stress getting to you?
Unless your whole system of values has changed "rebooting your life" is the wrong answer. Disappear for a day or two. Relax. Come back and fix a few things that are are giving you the most trouble but keep what's good.
Unless your whole system of values has changed "rebooting your life" is the wrong answer. Disappear for a day or two. Relax. Come back and fix a few things that are are giving you the most trouble but keep what's good.
Originally Posted By: yonyon
Too much stress getting to you?
Unless your whole system of values has changed "rebooting your life" is the wrong answer. Disappear for a day or two. Relax. Come back and fix a few things that are are giving you the most trouble but keep what's good.
My values have nothing to do with it. I just realized quite some time ago that I have the Midas Septic Service touch and the best possible thing I could do for anyone I care about is get out of their lives forever.
Too much stress getting to you?
Unless your whole system of values has changed "rebooting your life" is the wrong answer. Disappear for a day or two. Relax. Come back and fix a few things that are are giving you the most trouble but keep what's good.
My values have nothing to do with it. I just realized quite some time ago that I have the Midas Septic Service touch and the best possible thing I could do for anyone I care about is get out of their lives forever.
Why?
A radical change no doubt. While it may benefit you, it may well not.
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it. If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
There's also the chance that you'll never get a solid start where you end up. Especially if you're talking about only bringing the clothes on your back. Then what? I'm not suggesting that you stay rooted where you're at, but if you're itching for a change, make a planned change... Heck, even a semi planned one.
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it. If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
There's also the chance that you'll never get a solid start where you end up. Especially if you're talking about only bringing the clothes on your back. Then what? I'm not suggesting that you stay rooted where you're at, but if you're itching for a change, make a planned change... Heck, even a semi planned one.
Originally Posted By: The_Eric
A radical change no doubt. While it may benefit you, it may well not.
I don't really expect it to.
Quote:
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it.
No, she is no part of the problem. The problem is-entirely-me.
Quote:
If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
She can handle it...she'll probably be happier when I'm gone a while. As for the rest...not sure I care anymore.
Quote:
There's also the chance that you'll never get a solid start where you end up. Especially if you're talking about only bringing the clothes on your back. Then what?
If I flip burgers for minimum wage the rest of my life...so be it.
Quote:
I'm not suggesting that you stay rooted where you're at, but if you're itching for a change, make a planned change... Heck, even a semi planned one.
Everything and everyone I touch turns to sewage. (The board's filter will not allow the more-appropriate word.) I'm not really "itching for change", I just realized that the best thing I could possibly do for anyone I care about is to never enter their lives again.
A radical change no doubt. While it may benefit you, it may well not.
I don't really expect it to.
Quote:
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it.
No, she is no part of the problem. The problem is-entirely-me.
Quote:
If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
She can handle it...she'll probably be happier when I'm gone a while. As for the rest...not sure I care anymore.
Quote:
There's also the chance that you'll never get a solid start where you end up. Especially if you're talking about only bringing the clothes on your back. Then what?
If I flip burgers for minimum wage the rest of my life...so be it.
Quote:
I'm not suggesting that you stay rooted where you're at, but if you're itching for a change, make a planned change... Heck, even a semi planned one.
Everything and everyone I touch turns to sewage. (The board's filter will not allow the more-appropriate word.) I'm not really "itching for change", I just realized that the best thing I could possibly do for anyone I care about is to never enter their lives again.
A very bad move in my opinion. See a counselor.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
My values have nothing to do with it. I just realized quite some time ago that I have the Midas Septic Service touch and the best possible thing I could do for anyone I care about is get out of their lives forever.
I don't know you or your situation, but I highly doubt that is an accurate statement. Whatever difficulties you are going through cannot be made better by simply abandoning the people you care about. The "running away to start a new life" drama only works on TV; in real life it only makes things worse and doesn't solve the problem. Short term I recommend taking a step back and not making any irrevocable changes to your situation or relationship with those around you. You are obviously reaching out to folks in BITOG-land. Is there anyone close by you can discuss your situation with?
My values have nothing to do with it. I just realized quite some time ago that I have the Midas Septic Service touch and the best possible thing I could do for anyone I care about is get out of their lives forever.
I don't know you or your situation, but I highly doubt that is an accurate statement. Whatever difficulties you are going through cannot be made better by simply abandoning the people you care about. The "running away to start a new life" drama only works on TV; in real life it only makes things worse and doesn't solve the problem. Short term I recommend taking a step back and not making any irrevocable changes to your situation or relationship with those around you. You are obviously reaching out to folks in BITOG-land. Is there anyone close by you can discuss your situation with?
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
Originally Posted By: The_Eric
A radical change no doubt. While it may benefit you, it may well not.
I don't really expect it to.
Quote:
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it.
No, she is no part of the problem. The problem is-entirely-me.
Quote:
If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
She can handle it...she'll probably be happier when I'm gone a while. As for the rest...not sure I care anymore.
Quote:
There's also the chance that you'll never get a solid start where you end up. Especially if you're talking about only bringing the clothes on your back. Then what?
If I flip burgers for minimum wage the rest of my life...so be it.
Quote:
I'm not suggesting that you stay rooted where you're at, but if you're itching for a change, make a planned change... Heck, even a semi planned one.
Everything and everyone I touch turns to sewage. (The board's filter will not allow the more-appropriate word.) I'm not really "itching for change", I just realized that the best thing I could possibly do for anyone I care about is to never enter their lives again.
If it's happiness you're searching for, then would you really be happy flipping burgers? Pretty hard to enjoy life on that limited income.
Originally Posted By: The_Eric
A radical change no doubt. While it may benefit you, it may well not.
I don't really expect it to.
Quote:
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it.
No, she is no part of the problem. The problem is-entirely-me.
Quote:
If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
She can handle it...she'll probably be happier when I'm gone a while. As for the rest...not sure I care anymore.
Quote:
There's also the chance that you'll never get a solid start where you end up. Especially if you're talking about only bringing the clothes on your back. Then what?
If I flip burgers for minimum wage the rest of my life...so be it.
Quote:
I'm not suggesting that you stay rooted where you're at, but if you're itching for a change, make a planned change... Heck, even a semi planned one.
Everything and everyone I touch turns to sewage. (The board's filter will not allow the more-appropriate word.) I'm not really "itching for change", I just realized that the best thing I could possibly do for anyone I care about is to never enter their lives again.
If it's happiness you're searching for, then would you really be happy flipping burgers? Pretty hard to enjoy life on that limited income.
Originally Posted By: R80RS
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
My values have nothing to do with it. I just realized quite some time ago that I have the Midas Septic Service touch and the best possible thing I could do for anyone I care about is get out of their lives forever.
I don't know you or your situation, but I highly doubt that is an accurate statement. Whatever difficulties you are going through cannot be made better by simply abandoning the people you care about. The "running away to start a new life" drama only works on TV; in real life it only makes things worse and doesn't solve the problem. Short term I recommend taking a step back and not making any irrevocable changes to your situation or relationship with those around you. You are obviously reaching out to folks in BITOG-land. Is there anyone close by you can discuss your situation with?
Agreed and better put than I said it.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
My values have nothing to do with it. I just realized quite some time ago that I have the Midas Septic Service touch and the best possible thing I could do for anyone I care about is get out of their lives forever.
I don't know you or your situation, but I highly doubt that is an accurate statement. Whatever difficulties you are going through cannot be made better by simply abandoning the people you care about. The "running away to start a new life" drama only works on TV; in real life it only makes things worse and doesn't solve the problem. Short term I recommend taking a step back and not making any irrevocable changes to your situation or relationship with those around you. You are obviously reaching out to folks in BITOG-land. Is there anyone close by you can discuss your situation with?
Agreed and better put than I said it.
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Cold and hard advice here; but that is the easy way out. Up and leave and take the martyr roll. Takes mental toughness to stay; to fix whatever the issue(s) are; and move forward with 2 feet solidly planted on the ground. If you run it will catch up too you again sooner or later. The chip on that shoulder may subside but will rear it's ugly head until YOU take the steps to fix it.
Life aint easy!
Life aint easy!
Take a couple of days off from everything. Go do something you enjoy no matter how simple. I would think the whole holiday season may be a part of it. Lots of people dont enjoy the holiday season and find it depressing.
ls1mike
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Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
I'm considering...basically rebooting my life. Just walk away from everyone and everything...hitch-hike someplace (don't know--or care--where)...just start from scratch.
I think almost everyone has a day or two like that.
The key is trying to figure out what is important to you on daily basis and make it stick.
I'm considering...basically rebooting my life. Just walk away from everyone and everything...hitch-hike someplace (don't know--or care--where)...just start from scratch.
I think almost everyone has a day or two like that.
The key is trying to figure out what is important to you on daily basis and make it stick.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
I accepted a long time ago that happiness is something I will certainly never find.
Happiness is a choice, not a place or destination. Those periods in life when we are less than happy are almost always of our own choosing. Life moves on, and we gain experience and wisdom. Things that look insurmountable now will appear in in their proper perspective for you in the future. That's why making sudden or irrevocable changes is never a good idea. Don't doubt me on this.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
R80: no.
Then I strongly recommend finding someone who is objective to speak to. Finding clergy or a counselor would be a good place to start.
I accepted a long time ago that happiness is something I will certainly never find.
Happiness is a choice, not a place or destination. Those periods in life when we are less than happy are almost always of our own choosing. Life moves on, and we gain experience and wisdom. Things that look insurmountable now will appear in in their proper perspective for you in the future. That's why making sudden or irrevocable changes is never a good idea. Don't doubt me on this.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
R80: no.
Then I strongly recommend finding someone who is objective to speak to. Finding clergy or a counselor would be a good place to start.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
I accepted a long time ago that happiness is something I will certainly never find.
R80: no.
If I may ask, what is your age?
I accepted a long time ago that happiness is something I will certainly never find.
R80: no.
If I may ask, what is your age?
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
I accepted a long time ago that happiness is something I will certainly never find.
Same here, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have a decent life.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
Quote:
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it.
No, she is no part of the problem. The problem is-entirely-me.
Quote:
If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
She can handle it...she'll probably be happier when I'm gone a while. As for the rest...not sure I care anymore.
If she cares about you enough to have kept you around this long she's not going to be happy when you run away. Just because you're an ogre doesn't mean nobody loves you. Go attack someone's livestock for fun or something and then go home where you belong.
If you're really that awful try to make a list of what specifically is so bad about your behaviour and make small changes as you can manage.
I accepted a long time ago that happiness is something I will certainly never find.
Same here, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have a decent life.
Originally Posted By: Jarlaxle
Quote:
Also consider the ramifications. What about Liz? If she's part of the problem, you should deal with it.
No, she is no part of the problem. The problem is-entirely-me.
Quote:
If not, what would that do to her? What about friends and family?
She can handle it...she'll probably be happier when I'm gone a while. As for the rest...not sure I care anymore.
If she cares about you enough to have kept you around this long she's not going to be happy when you run away. Just because you're an ogre doesn't mean nobody loves you. Go attack someone's livestock for fun or something and then go home where you belong.
If you're really that awful try to make a list of what specifically is so bad about your behaviour and make small changes as you can manage.
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