Chuck Norris Passes Away

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Also, here's another tribute to Chuck.
http://www.4q.cc/chuck/ Hit the orange "New Fact" button to get more. Some of the facts are slightly not safe for work. Internet fads are the best!

The most important facts about Chuck Norris are:

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris invented the spoon because using knives to kill people was just too easy.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
 
It never ends. http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

Chuck Norris can never die. Every thirty years Chuck Norris gives birth to himself. A fully adult, fully clothed, fully bearded Chuck Norris, equipped with all the skills and knowledge of the previous Chuck Norris. Including round house kicking skills, black magic, and the timeless art of seduction.

Chuck Norris is so lethal; his ***** has biceps instead of testicles and deadly venom instead of sperm. It is for this very reason that he is known only as "La Cobra" in many South American countries, and is worshiped by tribal people living off the coast of New Zealand.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Chuck Norris doesn't need to use email or a cell phone. He only communicates through pain.

Chuck Norris can peel oranges with his eyelids.

It's not delivery. It's Chuck Norris.
 
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck Norris giveth, and the good Chuck Norris, he taketh away.

Gravity only exists because Chuck Norris allows it to.

If at first you don't succeed, you're obviously not Chuck Norris.
 
Chuck Norris can ejaculate through solid steel.

Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom

Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.

Chuck Norris is the only male to give birth. His only child; Vin Diesel.
 
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