Thinner atfs are there for less parasitic drag to increase fuel economy.
If it is too thick the valve body will have a hard time shifting and so fourth, because atf is also not only a lubricant but also used as a hydraulic fluid to shift gears.
Im quite sure Aisin recommends using a slightly higher viscosity in their automatics for better protection and less breakdown of the ATF.
As to why some transmissions are picky on what they run, some designs I believe in the valve body need that specific viscosity in order to achieve their goals such as shift points and limited slippage of the clutch packs (friction modifiers)