These were E-mailed to me so I won't claim them to be accurate but I thought they were funny enough to share.
Great literary taunts
"I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here."
-Stephen Bishop
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
- Winston Churchill
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
- Irvin S. Cobb
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
- Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."
-Samuel Johnson
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -Groucho Marx
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."
- Thomas Brackett Reed
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
- Forrest Tucker
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I
approved of it."
- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."
-Oscar Wilde
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -Oscar
Wilde
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
- Billy Wilder
Great literary taunts
"I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here."
-Stephen Bishop
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
- Winston Churchill
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
- Irvin S. Cobb
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
- Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."
-Samuel Johnson
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -Groucho Marx
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."
- Thomas Brackett Reed
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
- Forrest Tucker
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I
approved of it."
- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."
-Oscar Wilde
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -Oscar
Wilde
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
- Billy Wilder