Wheels:
Tire Rack has 16" steelies for $62 apiece -- or, for $87 apiece, you can get some alloys that'd save you 6 lbs per corner. That is a BIG difference for a manageable amount of money. I'd STRONGLY recommend the alloys.
I've never cared about looks, especially in a winter wheel (you're running it less than half the year and your car will be filthy most of the time anyway), so I'm probably the wrong guy to ask about that.
Don't worry about strength in a wheel that won't see a heck of a lot of miles or fast driving. If you hit something and it bends your rim, at least that's one impact your suspension didn't have to take. Bent wheels are annoying, but a lot less annoying than bent suspension parts.
Tires:
This is the hard part. It's going to be tough to get close to the stock overall diameter with a narrower tire. I've played with a few different sizes and, of the ones that actually exist, 205/65/16 looks like the best option. Good winter tire selection, too; can't go wrong with any of the options on Tire Rack. I'd go with the Michelin X-Ice Xi3, no question -- unless you're willing to pick up a lot of NVH for deep snow/slush traction, in which case the Bridgestone Blizzak WS80 might be worth a look (per edyvw).
Hope that helps.