Online dating

Originally Posted by Donald
I had good results if 5+ years of marriage is a testament.


20 years here.
Originally Posted by jcartwright99
It can work well but it has changed the game that is for sure. First, you need to know what you are looking for. Be honest about it. If you are looking to casually date or hook up, Tinder and others like it will fit the bill. Eharmony and match have less of that.

This dating has turned things upside in a few ways.

Dating ADD: Constantly dating and checking your account for the next best thing. It happens for both sexes. I've know people checking their apps on dates. The constant churn is real and people don't take time to get to know each other before chasing the next patch of green grass.

Real Life Attention Starved= Attention Whores Online
This happens less with dudes but does happen. Women who are physically less attractive or have a less than stellar personal or financial situations can easily fall into this category.

Basically, women get 10 to 100 times more messages than guys do. So guys are just trolling sending messages to a ton of women to see if they get a response. Women in real life who normally don't get any attention suddenly have a ton. That inflates their ego and they can become very selective. Many of these women though get a few dates with one guy and then ghosted after hooking up. Why...next topic

1/3 of the guys on these sites are degenerates. Truth!
Whether it's cheating, being dishonest, or only in it for sex there are some that hide their motives. This just makes things worse for the sincere folks.

This is coming from me, friends, and coworkers over the years. YMMV



Hypergamy on steroids.

[Linked Image from i.redd.it]
 
That graphic is so true from my experience. ...I refer to the 3 guys that get all the girls "Huggy men" which much of the time take advantage of their captive audiences. The result is a lot of women with issues picking good guys. There are normal people to find you just have to work thru the wreckages to get to them.
 
The women that only target the pretty boys at the top sometimes end up without a man, or having to settle way below necessary at a later date. They need to think, the genders are roughly 50/50, so they can't all have Brad Pitt.
 
Met my wife online years ago.

Yesterday we celebrated 13 years married.

Seems there are dating and hook-up sites and they are not the same.

Contrary to conventional wisdom, I met my unfaithful ex-wife at church and my long time bride online.

Originally Posted by Garrygb
What do you think about online dating? Who has experience?
 
Originally Posted by javacontour
Met my wife online years ago.

Yesterday we celebrated 13 years married.

Seems there are dating and hook-up sites and they are not the same.

Contrary to conventional wisdom, I met my unfaithful ex-wife at church and my long time bride online.

Originally Posted by Garrygb
What do you think about online dating? Who has experience?


Some of the best, most squared away women I met were off Tinder. Corporate law careers, 10 year plans, etc.
 
Originally Posted by Ws6
Originally Posted by javacontour
Met my wife online years ago.

Yesterday we celebrated 13 years married.

Seems there are dating and hook-up sites and they are not the same.

Contrary to conventional wisdom, I met my unfaithful ex-wife at church and my long time bride online.

Originally Posted by Garrygb
What do you think about online dating? Who has experience?


Some of the best, most squared away women I met were off Tinder. Corporate law careers, 10 year plans, etc.


Hook your wagon up to a woman making big $$$.
 
Originally Posted by Mr Nice
Originally Posted by Ws6
Originally Posted by javacontour
Met my wife online years ago.

Yesterday we celebrated 13 years married.

Seems there are dating and hook-up sites and they are not the same.

Contrary to conventional wisdom, I met my unfaithful ex-wife at church and my long time bride online.

Originally Posted by Garrygb
What do you think about online dating? Who has experience?


Some of the best, most squared away women I met were off Tinder. Corporate law careers, 10 year plans, etc.


Hook your wagon up to a woman making big $$$.




Why? I'd rather be with someone who makes me happy. I have zero need for someone else's money, or to be reliant on a domestic partner. That's part of how I planned my life out. I always knew I'd be single, so I did things in a way that would allow me to 100% realize my goals on one income. Now that I'm not single, it's nice, because my partner's money never enters the equation as a concern or arguing point or anything.
 
Originally Posted by Garrygb
What do you think about online dating? Who has experience?

My brother has had bad luck with it. He now believes the desperate ones are online with issues who are looking for a sugar daddy.
 
LOL...mixes results...haven't made it to meeting anybody yet, but some messaging...

But....over analytical...the people that are inviting you to be with them are fake...it's an online persona that they have made up, and as others have said have old photos, or have had filters applied...

I can tell you that it's true, as my last few months have me questioning why, after 28 years of lies, I would start something with a liar, albeit a small one...

It's a community around here of around 30,000 extended over a handfull of separate towns...as you walk around them, you see the use of filters and porcelain smooth skin....8 or 9, I've recognised, and as the sites state, discretion is paramount, but definitely not as advertised.

Exemplified by two apps which advised me of a new person that I matched to in my area....my ex...apparently got a baelor's degree in the last 12 months, and likes all the things that she disliked when I suggested them...
 
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My story funny with online dating........


10 years ago while attending college in San Francisco, I had no problems dating/Hooking up (I was still a young, in shape, 6FT tall rascal in my mid 20's)
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. But I still put up a profile on match(to open more doors) and was mostly looking for something serious getting tired of hooking up and goofing around.


Well the "looking for serious GF/LTR plan" didn't work for me. Thanks to Match.com I ended up hooking up with several women various ages, ethnicity's (mostly Asian lol), backgrounds. My craziest was a nice redhead, new in California from Massachusetts, mid 40's mom(Yes a M1LF), Double D's, fresh from divorce. Boy did I get to know the back of her 2001 Camry
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That lasted a few months until she wanted to try and work things out with here Ex-husband lol (He cheated on her with a co-worker) and as they say once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater.


Dave
 
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I tired online dating a few time. Once thing I learned is that women are master at making them appear much more attractive than they are. I think they use "filters" and all sorts of other tricks. I am in my 40's and would rather just have women be honest with their pics. I wouldn't recommend but met a few ladies in AA meetings. Those relationships were nightmares.
 
Originally Posted by Hyperscn64
I tired online dating a few time. Once thing I learned is that women are master at making them appear much more attractive than they are. I think they use "filters" and all sorts of other tricks. I am in my 40's and would rather just have women be honest with their pics. I wouldn't recommend but met a few ladies in AA meetings. Those relationships were nightmares.



Many females(no matter age) online use filters now a days whether it be random FB pics or online dating, I feel its stupid and misleading. It's okay for them to manipulate their pics online for dating, But for a guy, Don't you DARE put up a pic with sunglasses or hat
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Dave
 
Originally Posted by Hyperscn64
I tired online dating a few time. Once thing I learned is that women are master at making them appear much more attractive than they are. I think they use "filters" and all sorts of other tricks. I am in my 40's and would rather just have women be honest with their pics. I wouldn't recommend but met a few ladies in AA meetings. Those relationships were nightmares.


Sometimes people look much different in photos than in person.
 
Here's my story-

I'm 32 years old, never been married(won't be able to say that for long) and had never really seen anyone seriously up into my late 20s.

I signed up for eHarmony. It was expensive, but at the same time I figured that anyone who would pay the money was serious. I also liked that the site doled out a few matches for you every day rather than just having everything to browse.

Pretty much within a couple of days, I'd "matched" with someone who seemed amazing. She and I hit it off immediately and the conversation flowed naturally. We also dug into a lot of things like nit-picky stuff in Christianity and where we each believed certain things, and were both decently matched up there as well as just enjoyed the conversations on that. We made plans to meet up(she lived an hour and a half away) and that also was absolutely amazing. Still, though, about a month and a half in, she just abruptly ended things because she didn't feel "right" about it. About a week later, we picked back up, only to have her do the same thing a month later.

I spent a lot of time chatting with other people on there, but never really hit it off with anyone else. I constantly changed my match parameters, and everything else to try and "broaden the net" a bit.

Finally, a few months in, a co-worker introduced me to one of her high school friends. Funny enough, that all came about because I was showing this particular co-worker(who was and still is a good friend of mine) my recent matches, and a different one of her high school friends popped up as a match. She advised me to stay away, but said "I think you and (other friend) would get along really well-let me see what I can make happen." Long story short, that friend and I did hit it off well, and 3 months from now, she will be my wife.

I'd say overall eHarmony was a good experience for me, although there are upsides and downsides. On one hand, all the potential "big deal" things(kids/no kids current and want to have, drinking, smoking, religion, age) are laid out for you plainly, and their profile gives you some insight. You can also set preferences on all of those things for your matches, and there's an option to look through "close but not quite" matches(the girl I mentioned above that I hit it off with was one of those because she was a little outside the distance I'd specified) On the other hand, you risk marking someone off just because you see one potential red flag when it really could be something that's not a deal killer after you talked it out.

Still, though, my story is that I did have better luck one of the old fashioned ways-introduction through a mutual friend.
 
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