North vs. South

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1,835
Location
Ky
North vs South By now I'm sure that you have heard all the Redneck jokes. Now here are some takes on how Southern folks look at their Northern cousins: YOU JUST MIGHT BE A YANKEE IF: 1. You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside." 2. You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY! 3. You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly. 4. For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes au gratin to grits. 5. You don't know what a moon pie is. 6. You've never had an RC cola. 7. You've never, ever, eaten okra, fried or boiled. 8. You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork. 9. You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips. 10. You have no idea what a polecat is. 11. You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle. 12. You don't have bangs. 13. You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags. 14. More than two generations of your family have been kicked out of the same prep school in Connecticut. 15. You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show. 16. Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women. 17. You don't think Ted Kennedy has an accent. 18. You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-n-knife show. 19. You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach. 20. You don't have at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house. 21. The last time you smiled was when you prevented someone from getting on an on-ramp to the highway. 22. You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores. 23. The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus. 24. You call binoculars opera glasses. 25. You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping. 26. You would never wear pink or an applique sweatshirt. 27. You don't know what applique is. 28. You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice). 29. You don't have doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make one. 30. You've never been to a craft show. 31. You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you. 32. You can do your laundry without quarters. 33. None of your fur coats are homemade.
 
Messages
1,979
Location
Houston
It's easy to spot the yanks here in Houston. They're the ones trying to sell a black on black Saab without AC..... ..keep looking for the basement in their house. ..stop to take pictures of the oil wells. ("Well, look at that, Buffy, what can that be?") ..don't like Dr Pepper. ..put KETCHUP on hamburgers....(git a rope, boys) ..put sauce on a steak. before, during or after it's grilled. .."Fry" a steak... ..think they need to drain the lawnmower's gas each fall. Or buy fuel stabilizer. ..tries to sell tire chains at their garage sale. ..thinks a package of sweet-n-lo makes it sweet tea... ..think Taco Bell is Mexican food. and is amazed that enchiladas are common at the Chinese buffet. kenw- 5th generation native Texian and Son of the Republic of Texas. I can visit anywhere, I live in Texas.
 
Messages
7,409
Location
Austin, TX
Excellent kenw. I forgot to mention that the one and only window sticker I put on any of my cars read, "I wasn't born in Texas, but I got here as soon as I could!" [Cheers!]
 
Messages
12,385
Location
Northern CA
quote:
Originally posted by 427Z06: Excellent kenw. I forgot to mention that the one and only window sticker I put on any of my cars read, "I wasn't born in Texas, but I got here as soon as I could!" [Cheers!]
[Cheers!] [Patriot]
 
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