I doubt the max ram is 2gb, thats probably the installed ram. Laptops usually only have 2 dimm slots. If you bought 2x2gb dimms then you could get 4gb. Or you could buy 1x2gb and 1x1gb dimm.
Vista has a lot more services running than XP did. Vista is no where near as slim as XP was even if you trim the services to the minimum needed. Are all those necessary? I dunno.
That said, every OS has had higher system requirements than the previous one, so I doubt anyone can really complain about higher system requirements. If you want something that starts up really fast, try out Windows 98, it was blazing - especially if you used it on today's hardware.
That said, a lot goes into the "performance" of a computer. Laptops generally have 5400rpm drives, which can make boot times pretty horrid, and it would be even more horrid on an OS that has more services to load.
I don't want to sound like am an avid Vista defender. I've been using it on my home PC since it came out, X64 edition. Its definately had its problems and I 100% agree its slower than XP is.