Leather Seats vs Dating

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While this is funny, in hindsight (no pun intended), it is also a true incident! In my late 50's, divorced, and spending weeks on these matching sites (like e-harmony), I finally landed a date with a lady. My vehicle is an 07 Ford Ranger with leather bucket seats. With her in the truck, I leaned over to take something out of the glove box - and accidentally ripped a big one. The leather amplified the sound considerably. She said sometime like %#@**$%$ and got out and walked away. I'm not going to date anymore.
 
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That's too bad. Reminds me of a friend's girlfriend. I was dating her sister, we went to one of her college volleyball games out of town. On the way back she decided that the clothes were too gross from the sweat so she took her pants, underwear and all off and did what you did on the leather BMW seat. It was one of the grossest sounding things I've ever heard.
 
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A match that wasn't meant to be! Hey, I wonder if you can get a blues song out of that one: I was on a date and feeling rotten, but it felt good when I let it rip. I was on a date and feeling rotten, but it felt good when I let it rip. Now my date who I'd just gotten, decided to give me the big slip
 
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I have to agree with the majority here. One little toot and she bails??? Heck, if she had any real class, she'd have made a funny face, and laughed her buns off. (Though she'd probably never let you forget it, ever. Don't ask me how I know ) Hey, lady! Guess what? Women toot too!!!! REALLY! I just figured it out. She was afraid of being outdone, and couldn't handle the shame of losing to you in the future. ;\)
 
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I'm reminded of Jerry Seinfeld's nose scratch, which was mistaken by his date for a pick. "I am NOT an ANIMAL!"
 
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I think it was George Carlin who said relationships are a [censored]-free zone for the first 6 months. Can you believe it censors F-A-R-T! John
 
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If she can't accept the two of you are no longer in your 20's, then having her move on is a blessing in disguise for you. Date someone with a sense of humor, but at least go out and date...
 
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 Originally Posted By: John_K
I think it was George Carlin who said relationships are a [censored]-free zone for the first 6 months. Can you believe it censors F-A-R-T! John
Or Bill Engvall talking about the subject and saying you wouldn't be caught dead [censored] in front of your new wife, but after 20 years of marriage, you're sitting there on the toilet with the door open saying "get a whiff of that one honey!"
 
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 Originally Posted By: ToyotaNSaturn
If she can't accept the two of you are no longer in your 20's, then having her move on is a blessing in disguise for you. Date someone with a sense of humor, but at least go out and date...
I don't think he quoted her age, so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume that he was dating a 20 years old hottie! Amen to the "at least go out and date" part. BTW Shamus, if you can't find a hottie with a sense of humor, at least find one with lots of money! (J/K!)
 
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My wife tells me that when she has to use a public restroom,the womens restrooms are very nasty.Women just pretend they have no gas or underarm stink.
 
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Hilarious, man. Don't let it get you down. She wasn't a keeper anyway. Me, personally - I won't be seen around town with a girl that is scared of a loud [censored]. That's a sure sign of a woman who takes herself too seriously and that's the last thing a man needs.
 
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 Originally Posted By: BuickGN
That's too bad. Reminds me of a friend's girlfriend. I was dating her sister, we went to one of her college volleyball games out of town. On the way back she decided that the clothes were too gross from the sweat so she took her pants, underwear and all off and did what you did on the leather BMW seat. It was one of the grossest sounding things I've ever heard.
Not to mention the "lettuce in the morning effect"
 

SHAMUS

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20 year old??? Lord, man, my youngest daughter is 31! Can you guess what she would do to me if I brought over my date and she's in her 20's?? My daughter would call me a pedifile (sic).
 
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