War of 1812

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WAR OF 1812 AT WALMART Yesterday, I wore my Korea Veteran cap to Wal-Mart. There was nothing in particular that I needed at the world's largest retailer; but, since I retired, trips to "Wally World" to look at the Walmartians is always good for some comic relief. Besides, I always feel pretty normal after seeing some of the people that frequent the establishment. But, I digress, . . . enough of my psychological fixations. While standing in line to check out, the guy in front of me, probably in his early thirties, asked, "Are you a Viet Nam Vet?" "No," I replied. "Then why are you wearing that cap?" "Because I couldn't find the one from the War of 1812 . . ." I thought it was a snappy retort. "The War of 1812, huh?" the Walmartian queried, "When was that?" God forgive me, but I couldn't pass up such an opportunity. "1946," I answered as straight-faced as possible. He pondered my response for a moment and responded, "Why do they call it the War of 1812 if it was in 1946?" "It was a Black Op. No one is supposed to know about it." This was beginning to be way fun! "Dude! Really?" He exclaimed. "How did you get to do something that COOOOL?" I glanced furtively around me for effect, leaned toward the guy and in a low voice said, "I'm not sure. I was the only Caucasian on the mission." "Dude," he was really getting excited about what he was hearing, "that is seriously awesome! But, didn't you kind of stand out?" "Not really. The other guys were wearing white camouflage." The moron nodded knowingly. "Listen man," I said in a very serious tone, "You can't tell anyone about this. It's still 'top secret' and I shouldn't have said anything." "Oh yeah?" he gave me the 'don't threaten me look.' "Like, what's gonna happen if I do?" With a really hard look I said, "You have a family don't you? We wouldn't want anything to happen to them, would we?" The guy gulped, left his basket where it was and fled through the door. The lady behind me started laughing so hard I thought she was about to have a heart attack. I just grinned at her. After checking out and going to the parking lot, I saw dimwit leaning in a car window talking to a young woman. Upon catching sight of me he started pointing excitedly in my direction. Giving him another 'deadly' serious look, I made the 'I see you' gesture. He turned kind of pale, jumped in the car and sped out of the parking lot. What a great time! Tomorrow I'm going back wearing my Homeland Security cap. Whoever said retirement is boring? You just need to wear the right kind of cap! See you guys at Walmart!!
 
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600
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Earth
Next time you see Professor Walmart tell him you have a top secret recording he can watch about the war, and then hand him a low res copy of Iron Sky.
 
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27,419
Location
PNW
LoL ... he might have thought you were some kind of weird guy at Walmart. wink laugh. Yep Walmart is entertaining at times, heading there tomorrow for some fun.
 
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1,056
Location
Northern New York
I don't think you have to worry about the voting aspect. Unless they're handing out free booze n butts at the polls we've got nothing to worry about.
 
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17,897
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NH
I wonder if you guys ever look up the word "gullible" in the dictionary and find a mirror. I've read this story or any of a variant like it for decades now.
 
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3,237
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USA
That war actually started in 1811. The British attacked ahead of schedule, hoping the Americans wouldn't show up.
 
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Texas
Originally Posted by Sierra048
Originally Posted by The_Nuke
I seriously doubt that gentleman votes in any elections.
For our future and survival I hope not.
Pretty much what I was thinking !
 

CT8

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Idaho
Originally Posted by The_Nuke
I seriously doubt that gentleman votes in any elections.
I'll bet he does and obeys the TV.
 
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