Lost another military friend

[53' Stude]

Was talking to my old senior chief from the US NAVY today. We lost my old boss due to heroin and pills. Great guy when I was serving with him. He was almost 52. Was so strung out last I heard he was breaking and entering and staying with his grandma that is in not so good health. I tried to reach out to him 4 months ago but he played it off. I’m lost to be honest but I just wonder what happened when we were serving til when he got out. I’m glad I never, ever did drugs.

 

[53' Stude]

To be honest some people not just in USA but everywhere need to step the heck up and at least try to stop this

 

[Chris142]

I had a neighbor that was a tweeker. He was always riding a bike and digging through people's stuff looking for anything recyclable to get his next fix.

He was a couple years younger than me. Had no teeth, blood on his face from constantly scratching it etc.

He finally got cleaned up and got a job. About 2 months later he blew a tire on his van and got killed.

 

[SubieRubyRoo]

Adam, thank you for trying to step up and save your shipmate. It’s a shame when the people who deploy our military into combat zones don’t take any responsibility for the life-changing circumstances they so flippantly put our armed forces into. While I wish the VA could/would do more to help, I truly believe the best programs are ones run by veterans who’ve suffered and conquered PTSD.

Vets in this situation need their buddies. They need their buddies to be persistent & patient. They need the system they gave their lives & sanity to to support them medically, physically, emotionally and spiritually. If any of those things are missing, tragedies like losing your friend is the terrible result. I’m sorry for your loss, and pray every day that our elected officials finally start taking this seriously!!

 

[Braapdaddy]

Sorry to hear this brother......I have a friend the same no military but we have been on big commerical jobsites since we were teens and now 45 lost touch about 5 years ago he is still alive..... I really think about the guy in the 100+ days in the streets

 

[53' Stude]

Sorry to hear this brother......I have a friend the same no military but we have been on big commerical jobsites since we were teens and now 45 lost touch about 5 years ago he is still alive..... I really think about the guy in the 100+ days in the streets

I hear you. I think that todays works there are too many evils devices, places etc that folks get sucked into.

I guess to sum it up it’s like the old saying “some gave all but all gave some”

I do feel the VA needs to do way more also.

 

[Braapdaddy]

I hear you. I think that todays works there are too many evils devices, places etc that folks get sucked into.

I guess to sum it up it’s like the old saying “some gave all but all gave some”

I do feel the VA needs to do way more also.

Agreed there have been out of state jobs living in hotels/apartments working just to sleep and start over took a toll on my bud and me as well there aren't many happy stories from on the road electricians unless there is ample family support and a understanding wife..... my sons have been spoiled rotten and I admit to overcompensating with dirtbikes when was able to be home

My buds demise was the divorce and loss of his children in said divorce nobody is perfect both sides to blame

Like you said today's society enjoys everyone else's downfall it's like a meme or tic tok video dictates people's morals over just asking a person who is struggling what do you need to help you thru this

 

[PWMDMD]

I went to residency with a guy who was a general dentist in the army training to be a pediatric dentist. We became fast friends and we were like brothers. The nicest, kindest, most sincere human I've ever met. Fun doesn't adequately describe him. He was chronically happy, knew everyone's name in the room within the first 3 mins, was unbelievably outgoing, a dedicated father of 4, and always super positive about everything. His son had a very rare disease that required him to go to a university hospital halfway across the US for 6 months mid-residency. This was the first time I saw evidence of the cracks starting to form. When he returned he was obviously behind everyone and he needed to stay some additional time to finish his residency. He started showing up having downed cough medicine and then he was drinking or doing drugs. He converted to Mormonism at 19 (which made our friendship even less likely being an atheist) but it's now clear he did that because he was having problems with drugs/EtOH then too. I left residency and stayed in touch and he graduated and went back to the army where he was supposed to be assigned to a base where he'd be the pediatric dentist. I guess he continued to fracture and he was diagnosed with bipolar and bumped around the VA system for a few years but they could never get his meds right and he was discharged for medical reasons. It's also clear now that he was such a force of nature when I met him because he was hypomanic. He got divorced and then remarried his high school sweetheart and went into private practice. I thought he was doing well and then at the age of 35 woke up one morning at his lake house, walked down to the water, and killed himself with a gun. I had just spoken to him the week before and I had no idea. I'm pretty perceptive and to this day (12 years later) I still can't believe he's gone and that I had no idea he wasn't doing well. I cried more at his funeral than at my father's or my sister's funeral. People can be VERY good at hiding things.

It's hard when we lose people to this kind of stuff...

 

[Passport1]

For your friends, Taps

 

[wpod]

To be honest some people not just in USA but everywhere need to step the heck up and at least try to stop this

I am a very anti drugs or alcohol type of person. Using drugs or Alcohol like walking on a fence and it is easy to fall off the fence and have the drugs/ alcohol control you instead of you controlling them. Sorry for your loss and I have had some friends die way too young from drugs and alcohol. It seems the older we become the more friends we lose. What can we do? Most people will not get help until they hit bottom.. Drugs are mostly illegal already , would making them double illegal stop people from choosing to use them. Some of us are in mental and or physical pain and turn to drugs and alcohol for an escape for a while.

 

[SammyChevelleTypeS3]

Was talking to my old senior chief from the US NAVY today. We lost my old boss due to heroin and pills. Great guy when I was serving with him. He was almost 52. Was so strung out last I heard he was breaking and entering and staying with his grandma that is in not so good health. I tried to reach out to him 4 months ago but he played it off. I’m lost to be honest but I just wonder what happened when we were serving til when he got out. I’m glad I never, ever did drugs.

truly sorry for you and his family.... I can only imagine what that type of loss feels like. A buddy and I are well into over 30 years trying to help one of them. We are 65 years old and went thru 1st thru 12 grade with the guy. So kind of hard to give up after knowing someone so long. He is still surviving some how but has turned his back on all of us. Family + friends. Even a short jail stint could not "scare him straight" like we prayed it would.

 

[Creekside]

Lost my cousin just over a year ago. The things going on in his mind slowly overcame him. Took his life in his back yard. I'll attach his obituary as it recounts his service better than I could.

Obituary information for Stephen Todd Harper

View Stephen Todd Harper's obituary, contribute to their memorial, see their funeral service details, and more.

www.greenfieldfuneralchapel.com

 

[GON]

Lost my cousin just over a year ago. The things going on in his mind slowly overcame him. Took his life in his back yard. I'll attach his obituary as it recounts his service better than I could.

Obituary information for Stephen Todd Harper

View Stephen Todd Harper's obituary, contribute to their memorial, see their funeral service details, and more.

www.greenfieldfuneralchapel.com

Creekside,

Thanks for posting the obituary. Very tragic story. And to leave a spouse behind. Very sorry for your and the families loss.

 

[SammyChevelleTypeS3]

yes. Reading that obit really enforces the fact that it can happen to anyone. Sounded like a very accomplished guy who was capable of anything and I am certain a great loss to all whose lives he was a part of.

 

[Creekside]

I went to residency with a guy who was a general dentist in the army training to be a pediatric dentist. We became fast friends and we were like brothers. The nicest, kindest, most sincere human I've ever met. Fun doesn't adequately describe him. He was chronically happy, knew everyone's name in the room within the first 3 mins, was unbelievably outgoing, a dedicated father of 4, and always super positive about everything. His son had a very rare disease that required him to go to a university hospital halfway across the US for 6 months mid-residency. This was the first time I saw evidence of the cracks starting to form. When he returned he was obviously behind everyone and he needed to stay some additional time to finish his residency. He started showing up having downed cough medicine and then he was drinking or doing drugs. He converted to Mormonism at 19 (which made our friendship even less likely being an atheist) but it's now clear he did that because he was having problems with drugs/EtOH then too. I left residency and stayed in touch and he graduated and went back to the army where he was supposed to be assigned to a base where he'd be the pediatric dentist. I guess he continued to fracture and he was diagnosed with bipolar and bumped around the VA system for a few years but they could never get his meds right and he was discharged for medical reasons. It's also clear now that he was such a force of nature when I met him because he was hypomanic. He got divorced and then remarried his high school sweetheart and went into private practice. I thought he was doing well and then at the age of 35 woke up one morning at his lake house, walked down to the water, and killed himself with a gun. I had just spoken to him the week before and I had no idea. I'm pretty perceptive and to this day (12 years later) I still can't believe he's gone and that I had no idea he wasn't doing well. I cried more at his funeral than at my father's or my sister's funeral. People can be VERY good at hiding things.

It's hard when we lose people to this kind of stuff...

This sounds almost identical to my cousin's story. Discharged for "medical" reasons, blown off by the VA until one VA doc decided that all of the others were wrong and took him off his meds cold turkey. He had already surrendered his firearms to his parents as there were some other issues and he was having suicidal thoughts. 2 days after being pulled off his meds he shot himself through the heart with his crossbow. He was living a somewhat normal life up until that one doctor visit, except for periods where the meds needed to be adjusted here and there.

 

[Astro14]

I’m so very sorry for the losses posted here. Veteran suicide is an epidemic. 20 per day is what I’ve read, an enormous number when even one leaves such a hole in people’s lives.

 

[GON]

I’m so very sorry for the losses posted here. Veteran suicide is an epidemic. 20 per day is what I’ve read, an enormous number when even one leaves such a hole in people’s lives.

Astro,

Yes many publications print 20 deaths by suicide per day. Here is a link to one statistic, but it it two years old. I receive daily emails on suicide by service members, it is so very tragic.

Also, here is a study about veteran sucides from the Watson Institute at Browns University

2021 - Paper - High Suicide Rates | Costs of War

The Costs of War Project is a team of 35 scholars, legal experts, human rights practitioners, and physicians, which began its work in 2011. We use research and a public website to facilitate debate about the costs of the post-9/11 wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Pakistan.

watson.brown.edu

Army's 'Captain America' dies by suicide after nearly a dozen combat tours

The enemy could never break him, but what this decorated Green Beret eventually found was that his enemy was within.

www.foxnews.com