Having spend around 20 grand getting my own gums sorted out over several years by a top-notch periodontist in San Diego, I'll give you my $.02. I think your dentist has your best interests in mind. You need to nip this problem in the bud before it becomes a much bigger problem and your dentist has to refer you to a specialist. 4mm pockets are not the end of the world but the bone is not going to grow back quickly and anything you can do to help is worth it. The next steps are cutting the gums down and grafting on tissue to the sides to provide support.
I would suggest avoiding the mouth wash as I've been told several times it slows down the healing. Brushing, flossing and gum massage should be all you need to do. I also use a water pic device but I've never been able to get a dentist or periodontist to comment on it's effectiveness - but I think it helps. I would also avoid colas and any soft drinks if possible - stick to water and beer.