* Your co-worker tells you he/she has 8 body piercings...and none are visible. * You make over $250,000 and still can't afford a house. * Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze. * You can't remember ... is pot illegal? * You've been to more than one baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor. * A really great parking space can move you to tears. * A low-speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast. * You assume every company offers domestic partner benefits, a fab exercise facility, and tofu takeout. * You're thinking of taking an adult class but you can't decide between aromatherapy and conversational Mandarin. * Your best friends just named their twins after her acting coach and his personal trainer. * It's sprinkling and there's a report on every news station about "STORM WATCH '99." * The three-hour traffic jam you just sat through wasn't caused by a horrific 9 car pile-up, but by everyone slowing to rubberneck at a lost shoe laying on the shoulder.