The taxidermist.

[3for3]

A guy on a business trip walks into a bar in a small farm town and orders a shandy. All the patrons sitting around the bar look up, expecting to see a foreign visitor.

The barman says, “You ain’t from around here, are ya?”

The guy says, “No, I’m from the West Coast.”

The bartender says, “What do you do in the West Coast?”

The guy says, “I’m a taxidermist.”

The bartender says, “A tixidermist? What the world is a tixidermist? Do you drive a tixi?”

“No, a taxidermist doesn’t drive a taxi. I mount animals.”

The bartender grins and yells, “He’s okay boys. He’s one of us

 

[spasm3]

Ohhhhh thats baaadd.

 

[Nate1979]

Too funny.

 

[Cristobal]

A wealthy man came into a taxidermist's studio.

Taxidermist:

"May I be of assistance?"

Wealthy customer: "I just got back from a safari."

Taxidemist: "What did you shoot?"

Customer: "Mostly hoofed mammals. We donated most of those to the local towns and used part of the meat for food. I did shoot two baboons and brought them back in this refrigerated crate."

Taxidemist: "Do you want them mounted?"

Customer: "I thought of that, but it's better to just have them shaking hands."

 

[Shannow]

If I decided to become a veterinarian, I'd open up a garage business as a taxidermist.

"You'll always get your pet back in one piece" would be my slogan.