The Lawyer's Cigars

Messages
13,132
Location
By Detroit
A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against fire. Within a month of having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost "In a series of small fires." The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued... and won! In delivering the ruling the judge agreed with the insurance company that the claim was frivolous. The judge stated nevertheless, that the lawyer held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire, without defining what is considered to be unacceptable fire, and was obligated to pay the claim. Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000.00 to the lawyer for his loss of the rare cigars lost in the "fires." After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of arson. With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000.00 fine.
 
Messages
8,041
Location
MI
Tall Paul, Given the way things are now-a-days, nobody has replied to this "joke" because we are too embarassed to admit that we are all trying to figure out if this is a true story. One never knows about the U.S judicial system.
 
Messages
43,670
Location
'Stralia
One day an engineer dies and finds himself in **** . The engineer wasn't a big fan of hot weather, so he decided to build himself an air conditioner. After that project was done, the engineer figured it would be nice to put a pool in too. That one took a while, but eventually that project got done too. So God calls the devil and says..."How's **** these days?" "Not bad, actually", says the devil. " I'm heading down to the tennis court to play a few sets." "Oh, really?" says God. "Where'd you get a tennis court?" "Well, a few months back I got an engineer down here, and he really spruced the place up." "Really!", says God. "After the swimming pool and waterfall went in, he went to work on a home theater and a wet bar. The bowling alley and skeet range were a nice touch.....and of course the gym, and...." "Whoa, whoa, hold up a second!" objected God. "You can't have all that stuff in **** ! You rip all that stuff out and return it to firey pits of unceasing damnation. Right now!" "I don't think so big G" retorted the devil. "You return **** back to the way you found it or.....or....or else!" commanded God. "Or else, what? Come on, what else could you posibly do to me that's worse than cursing me to an eternity of damnation down here?" "Well. Ah, well........hmm..." After a moment, God says....."I know, I'm going to get a lawyer and sue your tail off!" "Right..." says the devil...."and where are YOU gonna get a lawyer?"
 
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